Private House Parties - Interview before attending, what will they ask?

mde 4764 · 10-08-2003, 07:47 PM

Dee and I have noticed that some of the private house parties require an interview before granting and invitation to attend one of their parties. We have been wondering what kind of questions might be asked in this type of interview. Anyone have any idea?

LadyCleo · 10-08-2003, 10:31 PM

My guess is that interview may be partly for fact-finding, and partly to see what you look like. And maybe it's to see if you are for real.

Questions:
STD-free?
Drug-free?
Committed relationship?

LC

naughty A · 10-09-2003, 03:08 AM

other possibile questions that might be asked...

what type of activities are you into swing-wise
straight/bi, fetish, soft swing, full swing

smoker/non
alcohol...
how long you've been swinging, if at all...
what you think your reaction would be to certain situations... just to see if you've thought things through

They also want to see if you are BOTH on the same page. That BOTH partners are willing participants and one of you isn't kind of ... well... reluctant...

but it also gives YOU a chance to find out what you are getting it to, for them to explain any ground rules and that sort of thing. and for YOU to ask questions.

Have FUN!

OhioCouple · 10-09-2003, 05:03 AM

We have only been to one house party, however we were never 'interviewed' to attend. I do believe the invites were based on our advert tho. The house party we attended had many folks just like us (singles and couples) and no one ever stepped out of line in any way shape or form.

Personally, if I had to be interviewed for a house party, I wouldn't even consider attending.

deeptouch · 10-09-2003, 07:12 AM

We started by going to a club. It used to be "Sinsations" in Columbus, now its "Club 104". We meet some people that we got to know and they invited us to parties they were having, several times.

It really was an extension of the Club people but the fun was that there were always other people to get to know, kept it exciting.

In our case, we both traveled so it made consensual "soloing" an easy arrangment. It was really something we both looked forward to cuming home to, if you understand.

We returned the invitations and had parties at our home, usually 4 or 5 couples. We found that to be an excellent way to swing, everyone was always very polite and courtious.

Quin · 10-09-2003, 10:08 AM

First and foremost, this is a private home. These people are opening up their home for a swinging function. They have every right to, at least, feel comfortable with those that are attending this private party in their private home. To open their house for a free-for-all (meaning any Tom, Deloris or Henrietta can walk in off the street) would not only be stupid, it has the possibility of being dangerous. I think the owners of the home are within their rights to *interview* those they do not know that wish to attend, even those that come with recommendations. Would you let any stranger into your house that came knocking on your door? No, you wouldn't so why would you expect these people to?

The *interview,* in all probabilty, is just a minor thing for the owners to get familiar with you, ask a few questions, and help them in knowing if they would be comfortable with you in their home or not. Put yourself in their position. Wouldn't you feel more comfortable at least being acquainted with the people coming into your home where you live, you raise(d) your children, etc etc?

My advice if you choose to be *interviewed*....be nice, be yourself, be truthful...that will do more to put the hosting couple at ease than anything else and you'll probably come out of the whole thing with a new couple you're friends with who will invite you everytime they open their house up.

The questions will probably be some run of the mill questions such as are you std free? Do you smoke? Do you smoke weed? Do any harder drugs? Safe Sex? Would you like to chip in bringing a dish or a case of beer or a fifth or some setups? etc etc.

Quin
()()

deeptouch · 10-09-2003, 10:21 AM

I wouldn't argue with that logic for an instant. As I said, the home parties we have attended have been as guests where the host knew everyone evn though the guests didn't.

Brit_Pair · 10-09-2003, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Quin
The questions will probably be some run of the mill questions . . . do you smoke? Do you smoke weed?

"Can you bring some of your own with you?"

Quin · 10-11-2003, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by deeptouch
I wouldn't argue with that logic for an instant. As I said, the home parties we have attended have been as guests where the host knew everyone evn though the guests didn't.

Sorry deeptouch if you thought my post was in direct reply to yours, it wasn't.

I recently had an instance with a couple from Jim's swinging group where the couple wanted to attend a house party being held within my swinging group. I asked the female (whom I've become kind of friendly with) if they had called the hosting couple and introduced herself, blah blah blah as I knew that this couple didn't know these people from Adam. Her response was, 'No, why should I. They're having a party, we've heard about it and we're going. They certainly wouldn't embarrass themselves by turning us away at the door."

That's exactly what the couple from my group did. They told this couple that if they had given a courtesy phone call maybe they would consider allowing them access but since they just took it upon themselves to show up (not knowing the hosting couple at all, nor many of the participants) they didn't feel comfortable allowing them access to their private home and to leave or they would contact the authorities and have them escorted off their property. Of course, the offending couple tried to name drop to gain access, but as the hosting couple said, 'Yes, you may know them but WE have never seen you muchless ever heard of you until now.'

Needless to say, that couple commited a serious faux paux. Many of their own circle are appalled at their attitude/actions and steer far clear of them now. And the kicker of it all....the woman of this couple is the one who told her group about how rude they were treated by the hosting couple...she basically just provided the nails for her coffin.

I, personally, have had two small parties at my condo. Tho it was kept on the QT, had someone just shown up out of the blue that I had never met, seen or were acquainted with...they would have been escorted to their cars and then escorted off the property.

Quin
()()

deeptouch · 10-11-2003, 02:41 PM

Hey Quinn, I think you are exactly right. Uninvited guests are never acceptable, and sometimes even if they are known. Geeeez, if they weren't invited in the first place, they should have gotten the message.

:slam"

MagicEnigma · 10-13-2003, 04:10 PM

My interview had more to do with my having been with the couple that introduced me into the private group I'm with. And it took a few trips before everybody was as warm and open with me as they are now.

bear_n_bunny · 10-16-2003, 08:46 AM

I've been through this "interview" or "meet and greet" process, as part of attending private parties on a number of occasions. Different groups handle things in various ways. One group (which was really a business, or so I felt) required you email them photos, along with name, address and phone number. Later there would be a phone call from one of the organizers, and after that we were emailed a form to fill out, which we had to bring to the party (along with $100).

Others were the "meet and greet" sort, where people would get together at a local restaurant and just visit for a while.

I never got the third degree from any of them. Mainly they were friendly conversations, with some discussion of the group "policies and procedures". Nominally the main goal was to check us out and make sure we were who we said we were, and that we didn't come across as nut cases, which they do get on occasion.

The only problems I ever saw with this process was where some the organizers, some or all of whom were always women, would start thinking with their pussies instead of their brains in terms of who they would admit to the group. This resulted in a number of subsequent unpleasant episodes at a few of the parties (anyone who think it's only the guys who are bad about thinking with their "little head" instead of their "big head" is living in a dreamworld).

But overall this "interview" process is normal for private parties, and you should be glad that they do them, and hope they are good at filtering out the chaff in the process.

-- Bear

**BiloxiCouple** · 10-12-2008, 06:19 PM

Bumped up.

PB&J · 10-13-2008, 08:29 AM

We attend one house party on a regular basis. No one goes to that party without meeting the hosts first, usually after being referred by another couple. And a good thing too! It makes for a comfortable (and FUN) experience in a safe environment, much more relaxing than a club, because you're not surrounded by total strangers in the same way, even if you may not know them personally (yet). I would not attend a house party that did NOT require an interview (although I think that a form would be a bit much, and $100 is definitely out of line)

***JustAskJulie*** · 10-20-2008, 05:03 PM

I wouldn't think of it as a "interview" in such a formal term (like a job interview) but more that they need to "meet" you whether it be in person or by phone. If you were inviting a stranger to your home for a party you'd probably want to at least have had a conversation with them first (or have some good friends vouch for them).

Some party groups are smaller and pre-approve all new members to make sure that they will "fit in" with the group as a whole.

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10-08-2003, 07:47 PM	#1 (permalink)
mde 4764 Here to Stay Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 54 Location: Texas Status: single male	Private House Parties - Interview before attending, what will they ask? Dee and I have noticed that some of the private house parties require an interview before granting and invitation to attend one of their parties. We have been wondering what kind of questions might be asked in this type of interview. Anyone have any idea?

10-08-2003, 10:31 PM	#2 (permalink)
LadyCleo Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 144 Location: Oregon Status: F half of married couple	My guess is that interview may be partly for fact-finding, and partly to see what you look like. And maybe it's to see if you are for real. Questions: STD-free? Drug-free? Committed relationship? LC
	__________________ A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. --Mignon McLaughlin

10-09-2003, 03:08 AM	#3 (permalink)
naughty A Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 997 Location: windsor ontario Status: couple - female half	other possibile questions that might be asked... what type of activities are you into swing-wise straight/bi, fetish, soft swing, full swing smoker/non alcohol... how long you've been swinging, if at all... what you think your reaction would be to certain situations... just to see if you've thought things through They also want to see if you are BOTH on the same page. That BOTH partners are willing participants and one of you isn't kind of ... well... reluctant... but it also gives YOU a chance to find out what you are getting it to, for them to explain any ground rules and that sort of thing. and for YOU to ask questions. Have FUN!
	__________________ The proper response to "Good morning" is not "Prove it!" Last edited by naughty A; 10-09-2003 at 03:11 AM.

10-09-2003, 05:03 AM	#4 (permalink)
OhioCouple Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 6,619 Location: Ohio Status: Married Female	We have only been to one house party, however we were never 'interviewed' to attend. I do believe the invites were based on our advert tho. The house party we attended had many folks just like us (singles and couples) and no one ever stepped out of line in any way shape or form. Personally, if I had to be interviewed for a house party, I wouldn't even consider attending.
	__________________ Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

10-09-2003, 07:12 AM	#5 (permalink)
deeptouch Here to Stay Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 43 Location: Tampa Status: M.Male	We started by going to a club. It used to be "Sinsations" in Columbus, now its "Club 104". We meet some people that we got to know and they invited us to parties they were having, several times. It really was an extension of the Club people but the fun was that there were always other people to get to know, kept it exciting. In our case, we both traveled so it made consensual "soloing" an easy arrangment. It was really something we both looked forward to cuming home to, if you understand. We returned the invitations and had parties at our home, usually 4 or 5 couples. We found that to be an excellent way to swing, everyone was always very polite and courtious.
	__________________ There are days when it's to hard to be calm. :facelick:

10-09-2003, 10:08 AM	#6 (permalink)
Quin Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 1,136 Location: Ohio Status: Single Female	First and foremost, this is a private home. These people are opening up their home for a swinging function. They have every right to, at least, feel comfortable with those that are attending this private party in their private home. To open their house for a free-for-all (meaning any Tom, Deloris or Henrietta can walk in off the street) would not only be stupid, it has the possibility of being dangerous. I think the owners of the home are within their rights to interview those they do not know that wish to attend, even those that come with recommendations. Would you let any stranger into your house that came knocking on your door? No, you wouldn't so why would you expect these people to? The interview, in all probabilty, is just a minor thing for the owners to get familiar with you, ask a few questions, and help them in knowing if they would be comfortable with you in their home or not. Put yourself in their position. Wouldn't you feel more comfortable at least being acquainted with the people coming into your home where you live, you raise(d) your children, etc etc? My advice if you choose to be interviewed....be nice, be yourself, be truthful...that will do more to put the hosting couple at ease than anything else and you'll probably come out of the whole thing with a new couple you're friends with who will invite you everytime they open their house up. The questions will probably be some run of the mill questions such as are you std free? Do you smoke? Do you smoke weed? Do any harder drugs? Safe Sex? Would you like to chip in bringing a dish or a case of beer or a fifth or some setups? etc etc. Quin ()()
	__________________ One thing about me is that I'm consistant in my behavior, my thoughts, and my posting. I don't sell out or change for any reason outside of my own self wanting to. What you see is what you get: today, tomorrow and every day after that. Last edited by Quin; 10-09-2003 at 10:15 AM.

10-09-2003, 10:21 AM	#7 (permalink)
deeptouch Here to Stay Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 43 Location: Tampa Status: M.Male	I wouldn't argue with that logic for an instant. As I said, the home parties we have attended have been as guests where the host knew everyone evn though the guests didn't.

10-11-2003, 02:41 PM	#10 (permalink)
deeptouch Here to Stay Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 43 Location: Tampa Status: M.Male	Hey Quinn, I think you are exactly right. Uninvited guests are never acceptable, and sometimes even if they are known. Geeeez, if they weren't invited in the first place, they should have gotten the message. :slam"

10-13-2003, 04:10 PM	#11 (permalink)
MagicEnigma Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 149 Location: Great Lakes	My interview had more to do with my having been with the couple that introduced me into the private group I'm with. And it took a few trips before everybody was as warm and open with me as they are now.

10-16-2003, 08:46 AM	#12 (permalink)
bear_n_bunny Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 465 Location: Houston, Texas Status: Happily Married Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:bear_n_bunny	I've been through this "interview" or "meet and greet" process, as part of attending private parties on a number of occasions. Different groups handle things in various ways. One group (which was really a business, or so I felt) required you email them photos, along with name, address and phone number. Later there would be a phone call from one of the organizers, and after that we were emailed a form to fill out, which we had to bring to the party (along with $100). Others were the "meet and greet" sort, where people would get together at a local restaurant and just visit for a while. I never got the third degree from any of them. Mainly they were friendly conversations, with some discussion of the group "policies and procedures". Nominally the main goal was to check us out and make sure we were who we said we were, and that we didn't come across as nut cases, which they do get on occasion. The only problems I ever saw with this process was where some the organizers, some or all of whom were always women, would start thinking with their pussies instead of their brains in terms of who they would admit to the group. This resulted in a number of subsequent unpleasant episodes at a few of the parties (anyone who think it's only the guys who are bad about thinking with their "little head" instead of their "big head" is living in a dreamworld). But overall this "interview" process is normal for private parties, and you should be glad that they do them, and hope they are good at filtering out the chaff in the process. -- Bear

10-12-2008, 06:19 PM	#13 (permalink)
BiloxiCouple Julie's Helper Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 4,002 Location: Biloxi, Mississippi Status: Couple with benefits and retired Swing Lifestyle Name:graceful	Re: Private House Parties Bumped up.
	__________________ *Live in the moment before they are gone.*

10-13-2008, 08:29 AM	#14 (permalink)
PB&J Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,308 Location: Southern Ontario Status: female half of couple	Re: Private House Parties We attend one house party on a regular basis. No one goes to that party without meeting the hosts first, usually after being referred by another couple. And a good thing too! It makes for a comfortable (and FUN) experience in a safe environment, much more relaxing than a club, because you're not surrounded by total strangers in the same way, even if you may not know them personally (yet). I would not attend a house party that did NOT require an interview (although I think that a form would be a bit much, and $100 is definitely out of line)
	__________________ Who doesn't like a PB&J sandwich?

10-20-2008, 05:03 PM	#15 (permalink)
*JustAskJulie* Your Hostess Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 29,288 Location: In my House Status: Female Swing Lifestyle Name:swingersboard	Re: Private House Parties I wouldn't think of it as a "interview" in such a formal term (like a job interview) but more that they need to "meet" you whether it be in person or by phone. If you were inviting a stranger to your home for a party you'd probably want to at least have had a conversation with them first (or have some good friends vouch for them). Some party groups are smaller and pre-approve all new members to make sure that they will "fit in" with the group as a whole.

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