House Parties to avoid the 4 way match problem

[vasilie]

we've never been to a swingers club, but really love parties for many reasons including the fact that there are so many different couples there, that choosing just one play mate is sometimes just impossible and for that we tyically just play it as it cums as long as we are both enjoying ourselves we are down for what ever.

[N&G]

Originally Posted by wetpanties

We haven't been to a house party yet but we have accepted an invitation to one in a few weeks and we're both looking forward to it. We've decided that we would first look for another couple to play with. If we can't connect with a couple, we would like find others to join us. We usually don't play on the first date (it has happened but it's not the norm) but we're open to the idea if we meet the right people, however, we probably aren't going to compromise our same room policy. We're open to suggestions.

I would suggest that you speak with the hosts to find out how people generally play. If everyone else plays separately you will need to find another couple very early during the social time. Once people start to play the room will usually empty quickly and no couples will be left, just individuals. The same goes for mattress space. If there are generally multiple couples sharing a bed you may be waiting for a while to get a bed all to yourselves. Same room requirements can be tough if there are a lot of guests and few bedrooms.

[jimnjan]

I think it depends on how big the house party is, and what the other couples are ok with. Most of the ones we've been too, it's been couple/couple. Jim & I are fine with going off on our own, but others may not be.

[MrkLin]

We like house parties for just this reason. Lin can feel free to play with any man (or men) she wishes, and I'm not by default obligated to play with his partner if there's no attraction, or we don't hit it off right away. We have yet to find another couple at a party that isn't comfortable with this arrangement, but if that were the case, I'm sure they'd meet a couple at a party in which to spend some alone time with.

Parties offer play options usually not available at a club or with just meeting another couple. Specifically, the couples attending a party usually already know each other pretty well, so there's no 'just meeting jitters.' The fact that it's somebody's home seems to make people a bit more comfortable than at a club or other semi-public place. At a party, the environment is a bit easier to control - i.e. the volume or style of music, temperature, etc...

Overall, parties are our favorite way to swing.

[Willing29]

Originally Posted by Pepper & Drew

They tend to move more quickly, and if most of the attendees know each other, the warp-speed with which the playing starts may take you by surprise.
Pepper

Wow, I'm glad I found this thread. We went to a party recently and just like you said it was in warp-speed, and my wife and I weren't sure it they are all like that (not that it was a problem since we had lots of fun). We both looked at each other and jumped right in.

[PB&J]

Ah, the house party.. we went to our first one when we were relative newbies, and after having it described to us by our new friends who sponsored us, I warned my husband that there was a chance that I'd just disappear from sight, so he'd better be prepared, which was ok with him. It did happen just that way, and he says he was a little taken aback, but quickly adjusted and went on to have a good time of his own. Several parties later, we still operate that way- we arrive together and leave together, but in between- whew! I have a friend there where the 4-way spark thing just ain't happening between the couples, but the party gives us a chance to have a great time together without any issues.

[CXXC]

We feel that house parties are completely different than clubs, resorts or meet and greets. Safety and comfort are our biggest concerns when going to the later. At house parties, we are both free to engage in the activities with whomever we please. If either one of us is without a playmate at a party, we are always able to join in with our partner.

[MrkLin]

Sooooo.... Am I the only one thinking that we need to have a Swinger's Board House Party? Surely there's someone with a big enough house located in the middle of the US who wouldn't mind hosting say a hundred couples from all over the continent...

[NCfuncouple98]

Just give us the address, we'll be there!

Originally Posted by MrkLin

Sooooo.... Am I the only one thinking that we need to have a Swinger's Board House Party? Surely there's someone with a big enough house located in the middle of the US who wouldn't mind hosting say a hundred couples from all over the continent...

[LFM2]

I can't even imagine wandering away from Dave to play with someone else on my own. Actually, we'd find someone or find that wonderful couple to play with before we played on our own.

We really haven't felt it's hard to find a foursome to get along with and if play ensues, we're all good with it.

[MrkLin]

Originally Posted by LFM2

I can't even imagine wandering away from Dave to play with someone else on my own. Actually, we'd find someone or find that wonderful couple to play with before we played on our own.

I'm really curious here - and I'm not picking on you. Don't you find the option of playing with the man of your choice while Dave plays with the woman of his choice (not necessarily the same couple) the least bit intriguing? You might play in the same room, at the same time, but not necessarily with a couple. You really have no interest in that?

As I said, I'm just curious - nothing more.

[LFM2]

Originally Posted by MrkLin

I'm really curious here - and I'm not picking on you. Don't you find the option of playing with the man of your choice while Dave plays with the woman of his choice (not necessarily the same couple) the least bit intriguing? You might play in the same room, at the same time, but not necessarily with a couple. You really have no interest in that?

As I said, I'm just curious - nothing more.

Oh hell, go ahead and pick.

The scenario you describe would work for us. Dave and I have never done a separate room thing. We're very much a same room type of couple. Now, if I found a guy and he found a gal, not necessarily a couple, that would be fine, as long as it was in the same room. We'll have to talk more about this. I know he read this thread because I asked him if he did (pointed it out on the computer screen).... but the kids were in the room and he didn't want to expand on the conversation. I'll let you know what happened.

[NCfuncouple98]

Originally Posted by MrkLin

I'm really curious here - and I'm not picking on you. Don't you find the option of playing with the man of your choice while Dave plays with the woman of his choice (not necessarily the same couple) the least bit intriguing? You might play in the same room, at the same time, but not necessarily with a couple. You really have no interest in that?

As I said, I'm just curious - nothing more.

When Mr NC and I first read this thread, we had the same thoughts as LFM. No interested in running off separately at a house party. We want to swing together. But, your scenario does put a different spin on it - and that would be intriguing. Still the same room, so why not?

[MrkLin]

The scenario I described happens all the time at our parties. One of our favorite couples insist on a same room situation, every one of our other guests know that, and everyone is fine with it. So, they might play with a couple, or they might play with people who are not a couple - it just depends on what happens and who they meet at that particular party.

That's what I meant when I said we like parties because everyone is free to play with anyone they hit it off with - not necessarily a couple. I didn't necessarily mean that couples split up upon entering the house and don't see each other again until it's time to go home (our house just isn't big enough for that, but I digress...) I guess it's just having that option open to us that makes the difference.

[LFM2]

Originally Posted by LFM2

I'll let you know what happened.

Well, we did a minute amount of talking. Ended up in the bedroom "talking" about other things. I think we were just excited that both of the kids were gone at the same time.