On Premise parties (group rooms)

[tbop]

This thread if more of a rant than anything else. And I realize that not every hosted party is this way. I also understand that the host(s) are responsible but no matter how much they spread the word, there is always those that can't seem to get it. My rant is about group rooms when a small group is playing. I have always taken the approach that watching is allowed unless the room rules depict otherwise. What I don't like, it when I've been playing with a small group or individual and someone just walks up and starts fingering my partner. I'm like "Whoa!, who invited you?" Just because it's a group room with beds lined wall to wall doesn't mean it's an open invitation for everybody. The thing is, it's mostly not the single guys, it's a male counterpart of a couple whose S/O is NOT part of the group but off playing somewhere else. Am I alone in observing this? Or has anyone else seen this behavior? I've discussed it with the host(s) and even though there are signs displayed in every room, some people just can't get it through their heads. For me, it kills my mood, I dunno why but I can't seem to focus after an interruption like that. I don't mind people watching and if my playmate invites someone from the crowd that's different. It's the uninvited guests that I feel have somewhat "invaded" our space.

Thoughts? Or am I just being pissy?

[jcbicouple]

You're not pissy at all. They are just rude, and need to be told so. We certainly wouldn't hesitate to tell someone that they were NOT invited and need to LEAVE, in no uncertain terms. It's not usually a big deal for us to forget about it, but can understand how it could be. Afraid we'd be extremely rude to someone that spoiled our mood just because they were a moron. :slam"

[EternallySingle]

If everyone doesn't agree, nothing happens. Some people don't get that. No means no, even if it is a single man that is saying it.

[VegasLee]

Originally posted by tbop
I'm like "Whoa!, who invited you?"

"The thing is, it's mostly not the single guys, it's a male counterpart of a couple whose S/O is NOT part of the group but off playing somewhere else. "

You hit on two great points here. WHO INVITED YOU is the main statement here. In any club or party we have been at or hosted the same rule is always applied. If you are not invited, you don't play.

Your second point, it is not the single guys.

As the male half of a couple I have never assumed that just because someone is playing with Laura that I have or can assume that I get to play with the s/o of the person she is playing with. I have seen statements made in different threads to the contrary and I will never go along with those that do assume since their wife is playing with the husband they have the right to play with the other.

No matter what, It is NEVER my right to ever assume anything when it comes to playing with anyone.

We host many parties and single men are always invited to them. Very seldom do we ever have a problem with the single men at our parties, it seems to always be someones husband that has to be spoken to about his manners.

A group of us met and talked about this and the only thing we can come up with is that some husbands feel since "they brought something to the party" they have the right.

Our group does not agree with that statement at all.

[LadyCleo]

I guess I am going to be in the minority here. While I do not think that any person should just walk up and stick their finger in someone without permission, I think that just playing in a group area leaves you more open to other people joining. If you wanted it to be a private party with just the people you are playing with, why not do it in a more private room rather than an "orgy" room?
The person who wants to join should simply say, "May I?" but you shouldn't get bent out of shape for other people wanting to join you when you are in a group room.

But that's just me...

LC

[fun_pairTX]

While it is beyond forgiveness to join without asking, being in a group room in the first place is an open invitation for those who ask "May I ?". While you are correct in wanting potential participants to ask first, (as it should be). You are inviting interruption by your presence in the group room.

[Maus-Katz]

I'd have to agree with LC and FunPair. And Dito to the "May I?" requirement. To me, that room should be "the-more-the-merrier" room, as long as proper etiquette is observed.

M

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally posted by Maus-Katz
I'd have to agree with LC and FunPair and ditto to the "May I?" requirement. To me, that room should be "the-more-the-merrier" room, as long as proper etiquette is observed.

Double Dito from us. Whenever we go into a group room, we are actually HOPING that some others will join us!