"Beautiful People Only!" Swing Clubs/Groups

M&B · 08-26-2003, 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by lovers
"Was it Mark Twain who said that he wouldn't want to be a member of a club that would accept him?"

It was Twain.

I could have sworn that it was Groucho!

thekolonel · 08-26-2003, 02:11 PM

I guess I'll have to be the lone dissenting voice. These semi-private, pre-screened events have been a godsend to us, as we at first found the idea of going to the public clubs around here intimidating. This is about sexual exploration, after all, and I'm not gonna lie to myself and say looks don't matter. While we are definitely open-minded about age, neither of us is interested in playing with people who are old enough to be our parents. And while I am attracted to a wide range of body types, from rail-thin to voluptuous, I'm generally not attracted to women who weigh as much or more than I do. It's just my preference, for better or worse. I can't fake it.

Despite the hype circulating in various media outlets (Playboy, GQ, etc.) these events aren't quite the modelpaloozas many people imagine them to be. Yeah, the guests are a bit younger than is average for the old-school swinger scene, and more attractive and stylish than most of the folks you see walking down the street. However, there's still a good 25 year age-spread and a variety of body types, including a smattering of BBWs and BBMs. Even within this pre-screened group I've already greatly expanded my definition of what is attractive. But at least I know, headed over to Grego's or wherever, that a decent percentage of the people are going to be sexy, fit and in my general age range.

This is about fantasy. Desire fulfillment. And there is nothing wrong with going after exactly what you want. How many people have posted on this very message board about, say, Mandingo clubs and wanting to find well-hung black men? I personally find *that* somewhat offensive. I could say "hey, that's not swinging: looks, race, dick-size, etc. aren't supposed to matter." But we all know that's BS. If people want to fulfill specific fantasies, be that with black men, statueque blondes, or BBWs then so be it. There's room for us all under this tent. I may not want to play with some of you, but that hardly means I don't respect you, or that the girlfriend and I are some vapid Barbie and Ken clones hogging the mirror space.

wcplnsac · 08-27-2003, 01:24 AM

I tend to disagree with your thoughts in this matter. When I find that I am not welcome just because I may be larger than some and believe me I am not, then I feel that it is because the people involved are stuck up bitches and really don't deserve to know a good person such as myself or others like me. As I say I am only 225 and really don't show it and am 5'11" or so and have been told by some very sexy ladies that I am very good looking and extremely well endowed, so where do people, especially club owners get off not allowing someone like me in just because they don't or their clients don't like my looks or age, or whatever else. I bet that there are at least a couple of ladies in those clubs that do find me attractive and would want to spend time with me if given the chance. Where do you or anyone else get off denying me or them the opportunity to find out? I have in the past had a party or two and never denied anyone the priviledge of attending unless there just plain wasn't any more room. I will let you know now that IT ALWAYS WORKED OUT unlike people like you would have people like me believe. I honestly think that it is more that you and people like you are afraid that one day your going to be a larger person and older and you don't want to have to think about it. OH WELL, think about it because it WILL MOST LIKELY HAPPEN! Face it, you can't be a young punk forever.

Ted

yawanna · 08-27-2003, 02:00 AM

Up here anyway, like lovers mentioned..it's the 'thing' to target the younger market. But, I was reading on another message board here about the 'young uns' and that they are a) just plain too young to connect with married folks with kids and a mortgage or b) too new in their relationship to be solid and stable.

We have had our influx of young uns and bottom line this 'beautiful people only' gig is it's people looking to make a buck off them.

Naturally 20 somethings going to a swinger club will find very few like themselves present.. the reason? a and b above

And in another thread, 'why', and to comment on thekolonel's posting.... it ISN"T just about sex. we can get that with lube, the right or left hand, a dildo (battery or manual) or up here we can hit one of the gay bars (yes lesbian, too) and pick up someone for an hour or so, or..... grab a hooker or 'escort' at a price.

Sure sometimes it's just about sex and those times are few and far between quite frankly. Because if you are a hit and run bang em and go couple in swinging.. word travels fast. And it's not a good word

When we go to clubs and swinger events.. we TALK to people. No matter what they look like, unless they have 3 heads but that never happens. It's personality THEN we can talk about sex.

It's hard enough to find people in our age range... 30's to 50's.. who have their shit together, never mind us applying to join a 'beautiful people only' event because.. who says THEY have their shit together? No one can. It's not about age or going to the gym...it's ATTITUDE and PERSONALITY.

THEN ...MAYBE... sex. get it?

yawanna · 08-27-2003, 02:06 AM

I say we start an after club on premise party for only people who 'get' swinging.. we need references

WildFlower · 08-27-2003, 04:02 AM

A beautiful people only club sounds way to elitest and snobbish. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I have met some attrative looking people but after talking with them for awhile found them less so because of there attitude and personality.
I would prefer to go to a club where all different kinds of people are welcome and accepted. I would enjoy myself more.

Elusive BiFem · 08-27-2003, 06:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by WildFlower
I would prefer to go to a club where all different kinds of people are welcome and accepted. I would enjoy myself more.

That just about sums it up, WildFlower. I really enjoy people. All different types of people. Some I like more than others, but it is a rare occasion that I meet someone that I don't take something away from the meeting.

I have no qualms with any person finding a specific type sexually attractive. We all do. But, while sex is one of the primary motivating factors in swinging, there are other things that come into play, too.

I find myself to be one of the most interesting people I know,

but if I was surrounded by people just like me all the time, I think I would get really bored!

I said that tongue-in-cheek, but really, part of what makes me and all of us interesting people is the different people and ideas we've been fortunate to know and experience.

And for those that might think my stance on this subject is "sour-grapes" - it isn't. Not at all. Except for my age, I suspect I would "qualify" for the "beautiful people" membership card. I just have my own ideas of what defines "beautiful people." Thank goodness. - EBF

**Alura** · 08-27-2003, 10:54 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by yawanna
I say we start an after club on premise party for only people who 'get' swinging.. we need references

As usual, Yawanna, you've sorted out the bullshit and nailed the obvious in such a way that there can be no misunderstanding. We're with you!

Alura

yawanna · 08-27-2003, 11:02 AM

thank you thank you .... I'll be here all week...don't forget to tip your waitress

**Alura** · 08-27-2003, 11:21 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by yawanna
thank you thank you .... I'll be here all week...don't forget to tip your waitress

We never forget. At our favorite restaurant, where we had the Dinner in Tulsa meeting between Mrs. Alura and myself, we have a favorite waitress we always ask for.

Since she's female, it's my obligation to pay the bill. First I figure 20% because she always does a wonderful job, then I add the "Cuteness Quotient." She has a very high "Cuteness Quotient!"

It makes it kind of expensive to eat there but those short-shorts she always wears makes it worth it!

Come to November in Tulsa and we'll introduce you to her.

Mr. Alura

yawanna · 08-27-2003, 12:39 PM

OMG we'd LUV to. Let me find Tulsa on a map........

OhioCouple · 08-27-2003, 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by yawanna
OMG we'd LUV to. Let me find Tulsa on a map........

Careful there, yawanna! Mr. Alura is a whiz with maps! And before ya know it he'll have half this board living in Tulsa, he is very persuasive...

yawanna · 08-27-2003, 01:33 PM

wcplnsac:

Quote:

As I say I am only 225 and really don't show it and am 5'11" or so

I absolutely ADORE big men - I like to climb all over them

I also LUV slim men - I can grab their sides and move them around

I also feel so amazing when a man is turned on by me, and shows it by touching my leg, or leaning into me, or gazing at me - or holding me very tightly when we dance or hug

and the best part? this all happened with big, tall, short, skinny, bald, long hair, 30, 40, and even a 55 yr old - classically good looking, average looking, even men who look like nerds in everyday life, but they are STUNNING in bed

Clubs or people that put qualifiers on their searches or events are choosing to limit their options. I don't want to make that same choice and I don't like that those limits are gaining momentum.

yawanna · 08-27-2003, 01:35 PM

Quote:

Careful there, yawanna! Mr. Alura is a whiz with maps! And before ya know it he'll have half this board living in Tulsa, he is very persuasive...

Uh oh.. should I just go ahead and book the movers?

**Alura** · 08-27-2003, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by yawanna
Uh oh.. should I just go ahead and book the movers?

Just the airline ticket, Yawanna. Some folks find Tulsa too hot in the Summer to deal with. Now, we prefer the heat to frostbite, but some don't. Y'all better come to dinner first and decide on the move later, eh?

Shame on you, Mrs. O. Tsk, Tsk, the way you talk, one would think I like Tulsa.

Sooners!

Mr. Alura

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08-27-2003, 01:24 AM	#78 (permalink)
wcplnsac Active Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 46 Location: Sacramento, CA Status: Couple	I disagree with you I tend to disagree with your thoughts in this matter. When I find that I am not welcome just because I may be larger than some and believe me I am not, then I feel that it is because the people involved are stuck up bitches and really don't deserve to know a good person such as myself or others like me. As I say I am only 225 and really don't show it and am 5'11" or so and have been told by some very sexy ladies that I am very good looking and extremely well endowed, so where do people, especially club owners get off not allowing someone like me in just because they don't or their clients don't like my looks or age, or whatever else. I bet that there are at least a couple of ladies in those clubs that do find me attractive and would want to spend time with me if given the chance. Where do you or anyone else get off denying me or them the opportunity to find out? I have in the past had a party or two and never denied anyone the priviledge of attending unless there just plain wasn't any more room. I will let you know now that IT ALWAYS WORKED OUT unlike people like you would have people like me believe. I honestly think that it is more that you and people like you are afraid that one day your going to be a larger person and older and you don't want to have to think about it. OH WELL, think about it because it WILL MOST LIKELY HAPPEN! Face it, you can't be a young punk forever. Ted

08-27-2003, 04:02 AM	#81 (permalink)
WildFlower Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 106 Location: Indiana Status: Couple	A beautiful people only club sounds way to elitest and snobbish. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I have met some attrative looking people but after talking with them for awhile found them less so because of there attitude and personality. I would prefer to go to a club where all different kinds of people are welcome and accepted. I would enjoy myself more. __________________ Living Life to the Fullest

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08-26-2003, 02:11 PM	#77 (permalink)
thekolonel Here to Stay Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 68 Location: NYC Status: Couple	I guess I'll have to be the lone dissenting voice. These semi-private, pre-screened events have been a godsend to us, as we at first found the idea of going to the public clubs around here intimidating. This is about sexual exploration, after all, and I'm not gonna lie to myself and say looks don't matter. While we are definitely open-minded about age, neither of us is interested in playing with people who are old enough to be our parents. And while I am attracted to a wide range of body types, from rail-thin to voluptuous, I'm generally not attracted to women who weigh as much or more than I do. It's just my preference, for better or worse. I can't fake it. Despite the hype circulating in various media outlets (Playboy, GQ, etc.) these events aren't quite the modelpaloozas many people imagine them to be. Yeah, the guests are a bit younger than is average for the old-school swinger scene, and more attractive and stylish than most of the folks you see walking down the street. However, there's still a good 25 year age-spread and a variety of body types, including a smattering of BBWs and BBMs. Even within this pre-screened group I've already greatly expanded my definition of what is attractive. But at least I know, headed over to Grego's or wherever, that a decent percentage of the people are going to be sexy, fit and in my general age range. This is about fantasy. Desire fulfillment. And there is nothing wrong with going after exactly what you want. How many people have posted on this very message board about, say, Mandingo clubs and wanting to find well-hung black men? I personally find that somewhat offensive. I could say "hey, that's not swinging: looks, race, dick-size, etc. aren't supposed to matter." But we all know that's BS. If people want to fulfill specific fantasies, be that with black men, statueque blondes, or BBWs then so be it. There's room for us all under this tent. I may not want to play with some of you, but that hardly means I don't respect you, or that the girlfriend and I are some vapid Barbie and Ken clones hogging the mirror space.

08-27-2003, 02:00 AM	#79 (permalink)
yawanna Has Left the Building Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,176 Location: Canada Status: married female	Up here anyway, like lovers mentioned..it's the 'thing' to target the younger market. But, I was reading on another message board here about the 'young uns' and that they are a) just plain too young to connect with married folks with kids and a mortgage or b) too new in their relationship to be solid and stable. We have had our influx of young uns and bottom line this 'beautiful people only' gig is it's people looking to make a buck off them. Naturally 20 somethings going to a swinger club will find very few like themselves present.. the reason? a and b above And in another thread, 'why', and to comment on thekolonel's posting.... it ISN"T just about sex. we can get that with lube, the right or left hand, a dildo (battery or manual) or up here we can hit one of the gay bars (yes lesbian, too) and pick up someone for an hour or so, or..... grab a hooker or 'escort' at a price. Sure sometimes it's just about sex and those times are few and far between quite frankly. Because if you are a hit and run bang em and go couple in swinging.. word travels fast. And it's not a good word When we go to clubs and swinger events.. we TALK to people. No matter what they look like, unless they have 3 heads but that never happens. It's personality THEN we can talk about sex. It's hard enough to find people in our age range... 30's to 50's.. who have their shit together, never mind us applying to join a 'beautiful people only' event because.. who says THEY have their shit together? No one can. It's not about age or going to the gym...it's ATTITUDE and PERSONALITY. THEN ...MAYBE... sex. get it?

08-27-2003, 02:06 AM	#80 (permalink)
yawanna Has Left the Building Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,176 Location: Canada Status: married female	I say we start an after club on premise party for only people who 'get' swinging.. we need references

08-27-2003, 11:02 AM	#84 (permalink)
yawanna Has Left the Building Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,176 Location: Canada Status: married female	thank you thank you .... I'll be here all week...don't forget to tip your waitress

08-27-2003, 12:39 PM	#86 (permalink)
yawanna Has Left the Building Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,176 Location: Canada Status: married female	OMG we'd LUV to. Let me find Tulsa on a map........