SYBARIS SUCKS!! (Long post-vent)

[northindycpl]

Our loving couple from out of town, came to see us this week. We decided to go all out and get a nice room to play for the evening.

I booked the Chalet Suite at the Sybaris Hotel in Indianapolis.

WHAT A GRAND, FUCKED- UP MISTAKE!!!!

We went into the hotel paid the $400 for the night, got our key and went into the gate, with our friends, to play. They required that we give them our license plate numbers, I even told them we had 2 cars. I was not hiding anything from them, as I figured it was an adult hotel designed specifically for FUCKING

After we get into the hotel room a very shitty hotel manager call our room and demands that our friends leave immediately. If not the would revoke our membership and throw us out.

Shocked, confused and frustrated I calmly explained to her, that they were not spending the night, that they were there to visit with us for awile and would be leaving about 11. She completely disregarded my comments, demanded continually that they leave within 15 minutes.

I, then, commented to her that I looked through the brocheure with a fine tooth comb, and other then it stating that all persons must be 21, it says nothing that couples' couples aren't allowed for visiting. She said it was on the back of my reciept. (Of course... I would have put it there too... duh!)

I went to my purse, on the back of my reciept, the second to the last line, underneath 'no pets allowed' states 'no unregistered guests'.

Great... I called her back and tried to give her my credit card number (for another $400 or so dollars) so our 'guests' could be 'registered'.

She demanded that they leave immediately, it would not work out that way, and they didn't approve of that kind of thing.

Well.... The Indy's and the Outatowners got back into their cars deciding to leave and go to the Embassy Suites down the road. We drove over to the front desk. Mrs. Indy handled the now situation ,as I was the one that signed in for the room.

So, I am greeted by the women on the phone. I very calmly explain to her that we would like to checkout and be refunded our $400 as, we were not aware of the "guest rule" prior to paying. Further, it states the policy on the back of the reciept, not on the membership agreement. (which I have recently learned is a violation of my rights as a member- discrimination) AND we did not use the room at all. We didn't have the opportunity to even set our things down before she called.

Now, at this point she did apologize to me for the trouble, but stated that she could only offer me a gift certificate towards a stay at a later date in the $90 room, for 4 hours. She could not, credit my credit card back. WTF?????

Irritated now, I explain to her that if this is a rule for membership, which I have paid $30 to become a member, then is has to be in the membership application, and by Indiana Law she has to inform me of the rules, prior to me paying dues.

Honest to god.... She said... "This is an establishment for male and female couples only. We do not allow in Swingers or Homo's, under any circumstances. We do not want to be known as that type of place." With that said, she tore up my membership card!

(Wow... they let in my adulterating friend every wednesday afternoon, and rent the rooms by the hour! But watch out for those freaky swingers!)

k... No credit to my card, no friends enjoying their stay, close minded, practically illegal membership, and now no card to prove it!

All I am saying after my rant... is never give them any money again!!!!

Upshot: Had a wonderful time at the Embassy with our friends, It was great to see them!

[JustAskJulie]

Luckily it was on a credit card so you can dispute it with the credit card and get them to do a chargeback. You don't even have to tell the credit card people you are swingers, just tell them you checked in and were thrown out because you had friends with you (who weren't staying the night).

[intuition897]

OH MY GOD!!!!! I have this thing about injustices like this and it burns my ass to just think about it. Get in touch with NASCA or the LSO and sic them on Sybaris. This kind of bullshit is discrimination, and there has to be some kind of lifestyle advocacy organization out there that deals with it when it rears its ugly head. "Swingers and homos"?? Her own words!? I can't believe they'd get away with that. I'd say the only thing saving their asses from getting THAT smeared all over in the newspaper is the fact that our lives (and our kids' lives) would be thrown in a blender over the controversy. Nobody wants to stir up a stink; we just want to enjoy our right to freedom of expression. It really is too bad they took back your membership card. Do you have any other proof that you are/were a member? Your receipt?

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by northindycpl

Honest to god.... She said... "This is an establishment for male and female couples only. We do not allow in Swingers or Homo's, under any circumstances. We do not want to be known as that type of place." With that said, she tore up my membership card!

How rude is that! I would have been tempted to tear her head off if I were you!

Julie's correct. Contact your CC Co. pronto and do a charge back, ASAP.

At least the evening ended on a positive note. Thanks for posting your experience, it's good inside information for members who live close to Sybaris to know if they ever consider going there.

[JustAskJulie]

On a different note, I guess we know why they aren't listed here. It's kinda like nudist camps, there's a difference between an adult hotel and an adult hotel that caters to swingers.

[Alura]

Julie's right. Dispute the charge. Your receipt from the Embassy Suites will prove that you had to stay elsewhere.

Above all, don't let the bitch get away with this.

We go to Dallas a lot. Once we had a credit card charge for a stay in a hotel when we hadn't been in Texas. Turned out the manager was using credit cards to embezzle funds from the hotel. When a guest paid cash, she'd keep it and charge the room to a credit card number she'd kept. If we hadn't caught the error and reported it, she'd likely not have been caught.

Alura

[northindycpl]

Originally Posted by intuition897

It really is too bad they took back your membership card. Do you have any other proof that you are/were a member? Your receipt?

Yes.. Ihave my reciept showing that I paid the membership fees and there is a membership number on the reciept. I also have all of the other papers and propaganda they gave me at check in.

It is really too bad they are missing the point. As swingers, we are just about the only sector of people that are willing to pay (sometimes a lot) for sexual experiences.

I mean look around you- all of us are willing to pay to go to clubs, pay for private parties, pay for sex clothes, pay for toys, pay for trips, and the list goes on.

Do you really think I would pay $400 for a room to fuck my husband? No offense, but I can have great sex with him at my house, for free, any time I want- and be able to sleep in my own perfect temperpedic matress when I am done! Even for a special occassion we are far more likely to go someplace "romantic" and spend quality time together over a weekend, not an overnight at a place like that.

I think I am going to go to the advocacy groups and see what they say.

I would just hate for any other "freaky swingers" to go through what we did. They have about 10 of these Sybaris hotels around the country.

[intuition897]

Indy, it just occurred to me that she said "swingers and homos". I don't know how strong our advocacy groups are in the lifestyle, but I'm sure they're absolutely vicious in gay rights organizations. Wouldn't it be an interesting 20/20 story for a gay and/or lesbian couple to take a hidden camera to this hotel and try to check in the same way you did? Hmmm... :evil: I'm sure if those involved in gay rights heard about this example of injustice - not necessarily about swingers, but about one of their own - they'd take an interest. If you're looking for a loud voice to speak for sexual minorities, they'd definitely be an option.

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by northindycpl

She said... "This is an establishment for male and female couples only. We do not allow in Swingers or Homo's, under any circumstances. We do not want to be known as that type of place." With that said, she tore up my membership card!

... they let in my adulterating friend every wednesday afternoon, and rent the rooms by the hour! But watch out for those freaky swingers!

Why does that surprise you? As has been pointed out in here by many others recently, "Swinging is NOT cheating." I don't know how the "cheating community" regards swinging, as I'm not a member of that group. But it's apparent that the swinging community wants to distance itself from the cheating community as much as possible. According to you, this hotel already has an established clientele of couples who meet there to consumate their adulterous affairs. Perhaps, by refusing you admission, they were just trying to spare you the possible embarrassment of coming into contact with a group many swingers find particularly distasteful...namely, "cheaters."

The same thing applies to cheaters vis-a-vis gays. Most cheating is done between heterosexuals who don't want to be associated with gays, so in order to "preserve the decorum," management keeps the gays out. They know that bringing some business in will drive other business away, and since there are so many more straights than gays, and cheaters than swingers...

Well, as a businesswoman, what would you do under similar circumstances?

Seriously? These "lines we draw in the sand," and that we refuse to cross under any circumstances, eventually become our prisons. I'm speaking of swingers and hotel managers. I used to think that swingers were "open-minded," or at least more "broad-minded" than the general public, but I'm not so sure anymore. There's certainly a paradigm shift in swingers attitudes towards sexuality, but as a group, we're about as narrow minded as the Bible-thumpers who would have us tarred, feathered, and run out of town. We're every bit as intolerant as they are.

Sorry you had to deal with all that drama on a night that should have been relaxed and fun. It sounds like you did about all you could do under the circumstances...unless you want to go on "Judge Judy" and try to get that last $30 back.

[inbeachcouple]

Have you guys ever checked out the Red Carpet Inn ? It's on the South side of town. We've only been there as a couple so we have no idea what their policy on having guests is, but their 'Theme' rooms make for great sex.

[northindycpl]

Yes.. Mr Indy and I were there about 10 years ago when it was Fantasuites.

Google a search on it, and read the reviews. it scared me off for sure.

Are you guys up around Monticello? Indiana Beach area? I heard there was a nice place up there on Lake Shaffer- A nudist camp that was swinger friendly, but I have no idea what it is called, do you know?

[inbeachcouple]

No idea what it's called. We're west of Indiana beach. Pretty much right on Lake Michigan.

Honestly, I didn't think the Red Carpet was all that bad. I don't know how much it's changed in the last 10 years though. It's by far no $400/night type of place, but it's not a no-tell motel by any means. We weren't worried about crack-heads, or hookers or any of that stuff by any means. It would be a GREAT place to have some fun with another couple in. If only it weren't a 3 hr. drive.....

[northindycpl]

We will go check them out again. When we were there 10 years ago, it was a fine place. I was really disappointed to read the reviews last week.

I do know they are under new management (I drove by there about a year ago and saw a sign Maybe that is why they are.

Hopefully the reviews will improve. It would be a fun place to play!

[OhioCouple]

I don't know what the laws are in Indiana...or anywhere out side of Ohio for that matter. However, I do know that that the laws in the state of Ohio consider the space that they have "rented" as belonging to the individuals that have leased it, for the period of time, they have done so. In other words, it's no one's business what goes on in that room, at any time, any point...unless there is reason to believe that harm may come to another. (No different than a private dwelling of homeowners) At which point one MUST call the police for intervention.

Disupute that bill. Refuse to pay it and refuse to bless them with your hard earned bucks again.

[Close Encounters]

Do I have a right to privacy in my hotel room? From findlaw.com 46201 / Indianapolis, IN