If he can fuck other women, why can't I fuck other men?

I have a problem i hope to get some advice on. We have been swinging-if you could call it that for a couple of years. During that time we have other women into our bedroom 6 times. i would like to have a another man or couple join us at some point but my husband will not even talk about it. i feel I'm being left out and that he just wants to play with other woman. Don't get me wrong cause I like our play with other woman and i like it when he has fun but i feel i should have the oportunity to have other men as well. If he can fuck other women, why can't i fuck other men? He won't even discus it except when we are having sex. When i bring it up any other time he gets jelous and says he could not handle me being with another man, not even if it is with another couple. Please tell me what to do about this. Do you think he is being unresonable? Am i being unresonable? What can i say to him?

[Chicup]

Perhaps you should have had this conversation 6 women ago.

Of course he wants to fuck other women, thats what 99% of men would want.

He's not a swinger, hes a guy who gets to have a threesome with his wife and someone else. Inviting another guy into it can be intimidating to a man.

We started with couples so we could each be directly involved for our first time, I'd try that angle, but its possible that he won't be open to anything.

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I have a problem i hope to get some advice on. We have been swinging-if you could call it that for a couple of years. During that time we have other women into our bedroom 6 times. i would like to have a another man or couple join us at some point but my husband will not even talk about it. i feel I'm being left out and that he just wants to play with other woman. Don't get me wrong cause I like our play with other woman and i like it when he has fun but i feel i should have the oportunity to have other men as well. If he can fuck other women, why can't i fuck other men? He won't even discus it except when we are having sex. When i bring it up any other time he gets jelous and says he could not handle me being with another man, not even if it is with another couple. Please tell me what to do about this. Do you think he is being unresonable? Am i being unresonable? What can i say to him?

I absolutely agree; if you are doing only FMFs for him its absolutely your turn. Just as the other threads have said, in my opinion its simply not fair that your husband is getting his cake and eating it too. I would suggest talking with him immediately. If he cannot compromise and allow you to enjoy the lifestyle exactly as he has I would stop all swinging activity until he can be fair to you and your needs as you have been to his.

[safireblues]

This is the perfect example of how lots of straight men are fine with bi-activity for him and the wife (even if he's just watching), but are NOT ok with wife fucking another dude.

[lost_j1]

What a joke!!!! This really sounds like a play off the post,"Straight Female in the lifestyle " Let's all go unregistered and post a spoff of the other thread. Sounds like somebody got a little pissed on the reply's. So let's turn the table and say FMF instead of MFM. Then let's throw in the comment we oly talk during sex. Since the last one was when she only talked when she was drinking. So the advice of don't talk when you drink. So I guess we should all be idiots and say since she only talks during sex we should advise to stop having sex. How fucking stupid are you.. Lets face it here the way you typed and put things in your post. Am I to believe that you used all lower case i's to make it look like somebody else... Hmmmmm, NOT Just so funny how the Bi(lesbian) women were brought in a negative aspect that all of a sudden this post would come out. Then used a unregistered guess to post.... Oh, boy, oh boy........ Shit happens move on.........

JAY!!!

[Pierced-n-Proud]

Marriage is a 2 way street with everything. Swinging amplifies any difficulty in a marriage because it effects the very core of relationship values. Communication is very important and he really does need to talk it through with you, not just clam up. I would cease all swinging activities until you can resolve this. Jealousy is a real issue, probably more for men as society tend to make men believe that their wives are posessions (and they are not!!). When my wife and I started swinging there was some jealousy on my part but when I saw the pleasure my wife experienced that outwieghed the jealousy and it is no longer an issue. BUT talk it through first. If you are truely in an equal relationship, then Hubby should respect your needs as much as you do his. I'd hold off until you sorted it out. It would help if you could hook up with a couple where the male openly shows his love and respect for his partner (and also his playmate). Such couples are difficult to find but "you never find your gold on a sandy beach"
Good luck!

[Edison Carter]

Ed here-- Why do people agree to an unequal sexual environment, then complain about it. Swinging is about getting what you both want, if not, you're better off not doing it. And this is just my opinion, the ole ' I could never see you with another guy' story is quite disengenuous from an adult male who fucks other women in plain sight of you.

[Reef99]

If your spouse can not be fair and treat you equal when it comes to the LS. I don't think you belong in the LS.

[crazycatz]

It's one thing to enter the LS to fulfill a certain fantasy or two (i.e. some couples want MFFS and no play with other men or vice versa and thats fine if thats what both parties want) but if you didnt express your wishes before you started this and went ahead and agreed to play with others on his terms then, in some ways, that's your own fault. Sorry to be harsh here but you should be doing this on BOTH of your terms. Stop playing and start talking.

[lovinher]

Originally Posted by lost_j1

What a joke!!!! This really sounds like a play off the post,"Straight Female in the lifestyle " Let's all go unregistered and post a spoff of the other thread. Sounds like somebody got a little pissed on the reply's. So let's turn the table and say FMF instead of MFM. Then let's throw in the comment we oly talk during sex. Since the last one was when she only talked when she was drinking. So the advice of don't talk when you drink. So I guess we should all be idiots and say since she only talks during sex we should advise to stop having sex. How fucking stupid are you.. Lets face it here the way you typed and put things in your post. Am I to believe that you used all lower case i's to make it look like somebody else... Hmmmmm, NOT Just so funny how the Bi(lesbian) women were brought in a negative aspect that all of a sudden this post would come out. Then used a unregistered guess to post.... Oh, boy, oh boy........ Shit happens move on.........

JAY!!!

redbullanonymous.com

You could be right but I think this is more common than you think (both ways).

Do you like it so much that you can't stop the female play? Maybe if you do he will see your side of it then. Getting him here might help him understand.

[safireblues]

Originally Posted by Edison Carter

Ed here-- Why do people agree to an unequal sexual environment, then complain about it. Swinging is about getting what you both want, if not, you're better off not doing it. And this is just my opinion, the ole ' I could never see you with another guy' story is quite disengenuous from an adult male who fucks other women in plain sight of you.

I totally agree with this.

[sweet_tna]

Ed said it all. If he's doing other women in front of you, he shouldn't be complaining about not being okay with you having another man around. If you want the situation to change, then stop letting other women into your sex life ('till you sort it out).

[Pepper & Drew]

Originally Posted by Chicup

Perhaps you should have had this conversation 6 women ago.

Of course he wants to fuck other women, thats what 99% of men would want.

He's not a swinger, hes a guy who gets to have a threesome with his wife and someone else.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

Pepper

[JTcamp05]

Why don't you tell him the same "rules" apply to him...... & untill he is open to fair play there will be no play...

Kinda think that will wake him up!!

[daisy girl]

Mmmm...this does not sound like swinging to me. It sounds like an unequal relationship where one party is having his fantasies fulfilled and the other is not. Please reevaluate your needs and how this imbalance is making you feel.