Review: "Happy Swinging" by Sue Gould

[JustAskJulie]

Reading this book makes me sad to think that Sue is no longer with us and can no longer provide the wonderful example she was to all those in the lifestyle. Sue and her husband, Ron, ran one of the most well-known clubs and conventions in the country for many years. In addition, she often spoke at other lifestyle conventions and was a regular contributor to several swinger magazines. I'm not sure but I got the feeling reading this book that many of the chapters may have originally been articles that she wrote for the various magazines compiled with other info to make a really good book.

Sue was known as the "Swing Mom" and the advice she gives in this book is just as down to earth as any good mom would ever give. Her advice is very real and honest, it's not the fluff that many books give you but the straight facts with good information thrown in. Despite over 20 years of experience in the lifestyle and running in her club she never comes off as pretentious or as if her way of swinging is the only way or the better way.

Each "chapter" is presented as a question (a letter to mom) and an answer, and she covers everything from questions about fitting in, self-esteem, performance issues, jealousy, alcohol, is swinging cheating?, bisexuality, age issues and many more in between. There were a few chapters on topics that I rarely see discussed and she discussed them in such a wonderful way.

I found Chapter 8 "Whatever Happened to Common Sense" to be especially good as it discussed our (swinger's) need to be discrete in vanilla settings, and just as non-swingers have no right to come into our swinger parties and get upset with what they see, we have no right to take our swinger ways and flaunt them in front of those who did not wish to be involved.

The last paragraph of Chapter 11 "For Better or Worse" is one of the best I've read on the concept of being open-minded and not judging people.

And Chapter 18 "Help! I'm not Perfect and I'm Scared!" addresses and issue that I rarely see addressed in a most honest way. The question of how do those with physical limitations (or even differences) progress in the lifestyle.

I would list this book as a MUST READ for any swinger or want to be swinger, new or experienced. This is by far the most honest and real book on swinging that I have read, no fluff and no trying to cover up the scars or skidmarks, just the truth.

[SW_PA_Couple]

Now this review actually made me want to buy a book. Just ordered it. Had a pleasant surprise. I had credit in my Amazon account from a holiday gift given by my manager. Had forgotten about it. Now if she only knew what I bought with it. Sheesh. Amazon Web pages are a bit of a rabbit's warren. You can do anything you want except log out.

~Michael

[Hedonismo]

What a fabulous recommendation, I just ordered it and look forward to reading it.

[LikeMinds321]

Loved your review, Julie.

Thank you for bringing Sue's book to my attention.

I also will be buying this book.

LM

[SW_PA_Couple]

Finished the book. JoAnn and I took turns reading chapters to each other. A delight. Yes, most of the same wisdom found in this book can also be found at Swingersboard. But Sue Gould was out there first with it, summarized and organized it nicely. A big impression I received is that the author tells her story with a very refreshing humility. In many places, she tells how here pre-conceived notions and beliefs changed as she, her husband and her friends explored the lifestyle. She gained a higher wisdom but gave the credit to others.

~Michael

[JustMrJ]

I'll have to put that on my 'wish list' for the next order!

Thanks for the wonderful review Julie!