Checking Attitudes About Herpes

[good times]

Like your interpretation of the studies you have looked at, you have totally misread and misinterpreted the point of my posts.

I do not disagree or disbelieve the results of the studies I have read, in fact, I totally accept them for what they are. Unlike you though, I do not misinterpret or misapply the numbers the studies give in order to support my position. You are not alone though, most of the numbers regarding these STD's that you read on the internet are not supported by the studies they supposedly used to generate the numbers. The fact is, your numbers above are total baloney, made up to fit your version of reality. And it is numbers like these posted all over the internet that have the less informed thinking that every fifth person they meet has genital herpes, which is absolutely untrue, and their is no reputable researcher in the world that would support that claim.

Reread my posts, do not color what I am saying with your preconceived notions, I mean exactly what I say, no more.

You said the following,

"(quote of me) If I play with people who are not infected, my chances of contracting the virus are 0%.

(your response to the quote) The problem is that you cannot know that the person you are playing with is not infected. Accordingly, you can never take your chances to 0% so long as you choose to play. But, of course, you don't want to deal with that point because--once you acknowledge the truth of it--you must face the reality that you will play with the infected, you just won't know it."

You obviously didn't note that I said "If I play with people who are not infected"

Nowhere in that sentence did I mention playing with folks who were infected, nor did I mean to as it has absolutely nothing to do with my point. Like your statistics though, you reinterpret what I said to make your irrelevant exaggerated claims.

At first I just thought you were misunderstanding what you were reading in the studies, but it is obvious to me now that you just wish to make sure that the numbers prove your point by applying them in a way that the originators of the numbers never intended, in the hopes that no one will go check or be informed enough to know that the numbers you are giving are false.

To bad, because STD's are a real concern in the lifestyle, but awareness about them isn't helped by people using untruths to try and scare people by making the problem and risk look worse than it is.

[fun4Ds]

we agree with goodtimes !

[celtic239]

Please correct me if I am wrong but I'm under the impression that you can contract genital herpes even if you use a condom because the disease is transmitted through physical contact and not through bodily fluids.

[JustAskJulie]

I was just looking for something else and ran across this old poll/thread. Looking at the poll results I find them very interesting in light of the current thread going on.

[toomuchfun]

Originally Posted by celtic239

Please correct me if I am wrong but I'm under the impression that you can contract genital herpes even if you use a condom because the disease is transmitted through physical contact and not through bodily fluids.

It's too bad no one felt the need to answer this question when you posted it.. because EVERYONE needs to know the answer.

Skin on skin contact is how herpes is spread, LOTS of skin touches during sex. HSV1 or cold sores, which something like 75% of people have, can be xmitted to the genitals as well.

Not trying to scare, just trying to educate... if you are HSV free, and expect to stay that way, the only 100% way to do it is blood tests. Even that is not so great because it takes up to about 90 days for the antibodies to show up in your blood.

Good news is, herpes is just an annoyance, and really has no serious medical impact.

Sorry... end rant... Interested to see what others have to say on the subject.

[DnG]

So much to think about !

As I said in our ‘introduction’, we stopped going to the clubs in Miami and stopped swinging around the time that AIDs became a problem. Since we were going bareback without thinking a thing about it…[and so was everyone else at those clubs] ....it was probably the best thing we did…to stop. It was around that time [1985] that we found out that D’s son had HIV….that stopped it for her and as well for me.

I’ve learned a lot from this thread….that warts and cold sores are a symptom of a type of herpes and that you never get rid of the virus that causes them. As a child [gradeschool and maybe highschool] I had both warts and cold sores often. Haven’t had either of them since [more than 40 years] Does that mean I’m still capable of passing something along to someone else ?

I think I’ve read all of the responses to this thread and am wondering just what percent of the members of Swingersboard are participating swingers and what percent are just lurkers…like myself. I would like to get back into the lifestyle but I can appreciate my wife’s position.

[exploringRM]

Wife and I are a bit new to swinging and of course STDs are something we always talk about. Many people, swingers and vanilla, get cold sores at some point, HSV 1. So do we totally avoid people wit cold sores, what do others think?. (of course we would avoid anyone with active sores, but in general, during non-active periods, knowing they had a cold sore previously).

[sassycpl]

Well we are swingers of about 4 years and been with about 13 couples, mind you condoms used also. And Yes we got Genital Herpes from the lifestyle, which couple and when is not a given but we do have it and its with us for ever. Many of you on this forum have it or it not will get it also thats a fact. We could easily go one with out telling people like alot do or alot do cause they ahve no clue they have it same result. Sure you say I use condoms Im safe and I look for sores and dont play with people that are not clean or sleep around. Well either do we is all I can say. If your gonna swing you have to assume the other peoson has it and be willing to get it. We will never know when or which couple gave it to us either.

[SW_PA_Couple]

Originally Posted by sassycpl

. . . Many of you on this forum have it or it not will get it also thats a fact. We could easily go one with out telling people like alot do or alot do cause they ahve no clue they have it same result. Sure you say I use condoms Im safe and I look for sores and dont play with people that are not clean or sleep around. Well either do we is all I can say. If your gonna swing you have to assume the other peoson has it and be willing to get it. We will never know when or which couple gave it to us either.

All of this is true and anybody entering the lifestyle or actively engage should give it consideration. I too am surprised that such a small percentage of respondents to this pole seemed to think that these two "intercourse" scenarios have equal risk.

~M

[Chicup]

My wife and I had a talk about this a few years ago when we thought we might have gotten HSV2 (tests negative *whew*).

We decided, without hesitation that even if we did have it, it was "worth it" because of how close swinging brought us and the good things it did for us and our marriage.

HSV2 sucks, but its not a death sentence. It would end our swinging, but not swinging isn't the end of the world either.

[sassycpl]

Well the good news is there are 2 or 3 good sites for singles and couples with Herpes for dating and swinging (yes swinging) all you have to do is google it. I think if more of the people that have it would use the sites they would be much happier than either not telling people or being worried about an outbreak. We are going to try some of the sites I mentioned.

[tribbles]

If your gonna swing you have to assume the other peoson has it and be willing to get it.

Early on in swinging, I would not have believed that.

Now I do.

I tell anyone who asks...I have no SYMPTOMS.

No freaking idea if I have any STD that has no symptoms. Just cuz we have tested negative for them last time we tested, we have been playing and having fun since then.

Take your chances or don't play.

Agree with Chicup that it's worth it since we are closer now than we ever thought possible.