Swingers who don't use condoms, is this common?

[slowluvr65]

As a single male, I always play safe (I use a condom). When playing one on one, condoms are expected--demanded even.

I have had the pleasure of doing 4 couples. Two demanded condoms (which I was completely prepared for). Two couples looked at me like I was green. One heard me opening the wrapper and sounded legitimately upset. The other was shocked I was able to produce one after we had been nude together for a considerable amount of time in a jacuzzi just before. So here are two women from swinging couples who expected me to do them bareback after knowing me (and me them) for less than an hour.

My question for all, is this attitude commonplace?

[DaveNSheila]

Yes it is from the experience I had when I was single and living in Arizona at the time which was from 99 to 03. Now my experience is from on premises clubs and house parties. Mainly depends on the couple and their preference. To this day have read where some couples even state in their ad. Bareback no other way. Unfortunately it comes down to you wont know until you are right there at the moment unless it was set up as a pre planned meeting and emails were exchanged through a site with personal ads. D

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by slowluvr65

My question for all, is this attitude commonplace?

Not really...

I think...

We have only played without once and that was with a couple we knew very well. But we have had one couple act completely surprised when I brought mine out (even after we'd discussed the issue - go figure) - and another couple who timidly approached the subject, but we quickly redirected their conversation.

We think most people use them - but what people say and what people do may be two totally different things...

Spoomonkey

[good times]

I don't know if this attitude is generally commonplace or not. We have noticed though that a lot of people are reluctant condom users, they use them because they assume it is expected. We have met people that if you require condoms they will pass on playing you. For us personally, we don't have a problem using condoms if that is what the other couple prefers. Our take on the whole condom issue is that our play partners are pretty much from the same social background as we are, so as far as exposure to the types of std's that condoms might prevent is concerned, the risk is low enough to not be a concern for us. And as we are both surgically fixed, pregnancy isn't an issue for us either. After spending way more hours than I would like to admit on the internet studying std's and the effectiveness of condoms in preventing them we decided that we have a better chance of getting struck by lightning while walking from the car to the club than we do of being exposed to an std that a condom could prevent from the people inside. So while we always bring condoms on our play dates we make sure and ask ahead of time and only use them if requested.

To get back to the answer to your question, let me just say, I've worn out and thrown away twice as many condoms in my pocket than I have thrown away from their intended use. So I guess playing bareback is more common than not if our experience is any indication.

[DBL D]

I'm happy to see that there others here who feel that going bareback is not a problem, under the right conditions...namely, you still have to trust someone even though you know they see others and may play bareback with them too. I still feel that STD's aren't a problem within our "society". No way are we going to be upset when we use them though. We'll slog through somehow.

Male D

[twoferfun69]

Ok, I've seen positives and negatives to both sides of this issue. As for us, just for peace of mind, we will most likely insist on condoms at all times.
Having said that, I have a question--
Have any of you gentlemen had the problem of the condom coming off.....ummmmm...... inside?
I am of average size, and not usually prone to having this problem, however, as some may know we had our first experience last weekend, and this happened. Both mine and Mr. Playmates came off, which was rather disturbing. He said he has never had this problem before either. Both Mrs. Twofer and Mrs. Playmate are of average......snugness. Meaning not uncomfortably tight so as to cause this. (Mrs Twofer and I used one for anal play a month ago.....no problems)
Could it be the brand/style? We were using Lifestyles Ultra Sensitive. (No--not the magnums or should I have put this ??? )
Well anyway......thanks to all!!

[slowluvr65]

I'll admit to losing the condom inside once. It was my very first on line date, and I guess I am still dealing with this timing issue. I had given her a wonderful oral treatment including a nice finger fucking when suddenly she announced she was ready for me. Well I was busy concentrating on her pleasure so I wasn't, uh, that ready. Quickly diving across the bed for the waiting condom I always place where I can find it, I put it on in a hurry onto my unprepared equipment and I guess I didn't roll it far enough up the shaft. When I pulled out a while later to change positions, I came out bare. First I was shocked then realizing where it was left, so was she. The procedings came to an immediate stop while she ran in the bathroom to try to fish it out. Unsuccessful she came back sheepishly asking for my help. Maybe she felt I would have a problem reaching into the same part of her body that I had earlier been in for her pleasure, just to retrieve a condom, but I felt fine going in there. I'll add that once we solved the problem it was just as much fun to start the proceedings all over again. Since then I have always made sure it is rolled all the way up and haven't had a problem.

By the way, guys, I always have at least two (and usually more). That's not to brag about my studliness, it is just there in case of problems. The delay an inadvertant rip or a tear can cause things to slow down to the point that you have to get her interest again. Know what I mean?

[WoodyInSoCal]

When I first began swinging, I was invited to parties on the East Coast (Chessapeake Bay). I live in Los Angeles. I was very surprised to see that only one woman asked that I use condoms. There were about 30 couples. Only the couple that invited me knew me. But as I said none of them had a problem with going bareback except for the 30 year old who was 4 months pregnant.

On the West coast however, at the club parties and house parties almost everyone expects condoms to be used. There are a few clubs where that isn't the case, but for the most part it is.

[WoodyInSoCal]

Originally Posted by twoferfun69

Have any of you gentlemen had the problem of the condom coming off.....ummmmm...... inside?

I have had it occur after I've cum but not pulled out. If I try to stay inside her and continue stroking, two things are occuring: 1. I get a little soft for a few minutes after ejaculating, and 2. my cum acts like a lubricant on the inside of the condom.

The pumping action causes the thing to slide off. Then it's time to go fishing! ....which in and of itself can lead to lots more fun!

[corkwan]

my wife has gone off the birth control pill, so we're usuing condoms as our birth control method. i've not had one come off, but i've been exceptionally careful. heres some things:

* having lube, or even spit, on your cock will make the condom slip. you can put a small drop inside the top of the condom if you like, but the shaft should be dry. i tried the lube in the end, which some say increases your pleasure, but i found the opposite. i prefer my cock to be dry, and tightly wrapped.

* precum, after a while, gets the condom really slippery on the inside. this has two effects, it doesnt feel as good to me, and more importantly, it is much easier to slip off. if we are having sex for a long time, then i will remove the condom, dry off my cock, and put a new condom on. alternatively, you can use this as an opportunity to switch it up, and have some oral sex for a while before continuing.

* plenty of lube on the outside of the condom reduces friction, and breakage risk. it also reduces pull on the condom.

* cock sizes vary. if your long and thin, or just thin, then maybe you should try a different size of condom. i know this will take a lot of humility for some guys, but what would you rather, it coming off, or it fitting you right. chances are a proper sized condom will also feel better to you.

* pull out after you cum. if you want to keep stimulating hergo down on her and use your fingers or a dildo. or if you insist on staying inside, hold the base of the condom, although it may still leak.

it is fairly well known that the ineffectiveness of condoms is not in the design, but rather in how they are used. i mean, putting rubbers on a bannana hardly prepares you for the dynamics of fucking all night?... so it is worth while updating your sex education...

here is a good webpage on condom use, worth a look even if you thikn you know it all: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/pp2...pub-condom.xml

[corkwan]

Originally Posted by slowluvr65

By the way, guys, I always have at least two (and usually more). That's not to brag about my studliness, it is just there in case of problems. The delay an inadvertant rip or a tear can cause things to slow down to the point that you have to get her interest again. Know what I mean?

i hope you don't mean wearing two condoms at once... use extra thick/safe ones if your concerned about that. using two at once increases the risk of breakage due to latex-latex friction.

[slowluvr65]

Originally Posted by corkwan

i hope you don't mean wearing two condoms at once... use extra thick/safe ones if your concerned about that. using two at once increases the risk of breakage due to latex-latex friction.

Certainly not. I mean I have a backup ready in case there is a problem with the first one. You don't want to lose her interest with any sort of delay.