Staying a virgin and swinging

[De and Ci]

Originally Posted by Sunnylow67

So what's the specials for the hubby?

Good point. I can see the conversation on their wedding night. "Well Honey, I circle-jerked 40 guys at this one party-Had to take a long shower to get all the splooge out of my hair, I fucked about 20 guys and gals with a strap-on, I've had lots of women take turns licking my snatch while I licked theirs, I masturbated in front of 50 people at this other party, but hey, I'm a Virgin, my hoochie has never been penetrated by a real live tallywhacker, I'm as pure as the driven snow!"
I don't think most guys have this in mind when imagining a Virgin.

[Couple-N-NM]

nevermind. I can't get my point out of my head and onto the screen so that it makes sense.

Hope you find what you're looking for.

[Cabrownsugar]

I think society & Homesexual wanting to be heard has confused the definition of the word virgin.The word never changed.It's people who want to change the word.
A virgin( point blank) is a man or woman who never had vaginal sex with the opposite sex.It's a gay man or lesbian who has to define their virginity not a bisexual or heterosexual person.Most people will have had vaginal sex in their lifetime unless due to medical reason or asexual.Even gay men & lesbian will have vaginal sex with the opposite sex.
I notice in the 90's. The virgin definition is being challenge because The gay community wants to be heard.Sex is like a pie .There are differant cuts to the pie.A virgin who practice outercourse is stil a virgin until vaginal sex.Everybody wants to say what about anal,oral or first kiss.What happen she use a tampon or dildo.Doesn't matter. A virgin is a virgin until she has vaginal sex.This was the rules in the olden day like it or not. The sex act that lead to prengancy counted not the other act.
What about Gay men if a gay man never has vaginal sex with a woman.Anal sex means he lost his virginity.A lesbian if she never has vaginal sex with a man. They say oral sex means she lost her virginity.
You might not like the rules but those are the rules.People need to stop changing the rules.
Cabrownsugar

[Cabrownsugar]

De and Si,

Most men are being educated about Today virgins.Virgins are claiming their sexuality.We shouldn't have to wait til our wedding night just to learn about sex.Some of us are learning about outercourse & some of us like me are still strict virgin.We've never done anything .
I haven't had any complains from nonvirgin men about exploring my sexuality as a virgin. Most nonvirgin people don't understand but i rather have virgins practice outercourse then make a mistake and have vaignal sex knowing it was a mistake..
Nobody 100% pure.We're all unpure one way or another. My future man not goingto be worried about my strap on dildo or masturbuting in front of some people.My man going to be wishing.i masturbate in front of him & using my strap on dildo on him.The men i talk too know i'm a freak & I don't hide what i'm thinking or what i'm planning on doing to my men..
Cabrownsugar

[De and Ci]

Cabrownsugar, You got some strange views about sex. As someone else said, it sounds like you have a fetish.

[Cabrownsugar]

Wow it's been a long time scent i've posted on this board.Hello everybody.I'm going to answer De and Ci question about virginity.
I don't have a fetish or strange view about sex.All i want to do is educate myself about sex before i lose my virginity via LT relationship or marriage.Society tells virgins we shouldn't educate ourselves about sex until it's time.
My question is why should i have to wait until my wedding night or LT relationship to educate myself about sex.I'm not into casual intercourse but outercourse???.I'm coming to the swinger community to educate myself about sex.So when i do have intercourse.I'm not naive about the subject.
P.S I have to say one more thing. Everybody on this board has been VERY friendly to me.Yes i got some weird comment.What is a virgin doing here but it's good to know sexually active people can welcome a virgin in their community.I had my own stereotype about swingers but this community has educated me about sex and all i have to say is Thank you.Your words good or bad meant alot to me.

[Couple_N_Ark]

We're just curious....once you actually lose your virginity, and possibly marry, are you interested in becoming a swinger?

Just curious since you seem to be wanting to learn about swinging? Or is it just learning about sex with your future partner?

[prettylady]

Just a thought, I was unable to find the comment about the virgin.
could it be a women new to swinging. I called myself a swinging virgin.
simply meaning that I have never swung before. Could that be what was ment by virgin. I remember being a virgin, albeit vaguely, but I still remember. I couldn't imagine swinging being my first sexual experience. But if it is yours, more power to you, I am becoming more and more excited about my first time.
If I am wrong about the virgin thing, oh well , I have been wrong before and I will be wrong again.
Your friend,
Prettylady

[Tantra]

The obsession that this planet has with "virginity" and "purity" is just another sickness that needs curing. By this I'm not pointing fingers at anyone in particular - just society in general for engendering this unhealthy expectation.

I am a man who has never had a penis "penetrate" my mouth - does that mean I'm an "oral virgin" of desirable "purity"? I guess I'm also an anal virgin, and a handjob virgin, and a footjob virgin. I've never had a woman hump my shin - I'm a shin virgin. Heck, I'm oozing purity out of my pores. This is ridiculous.

Now I'm all for people learning about sex and getting emotionally prepared for sex, etc, etc. But this whole virgin thing is silly - "I want to learn how to shift gears, and use the accelerator, and turn signals, but don't actually want to sit in the driver's seat or touch the steering wheel." Yikes! I know it's not the virgin's fault (and by virgin, I'm not implying specifically the starter of this thread). It is the fault of society and the religions that people cling to.

Genital mutilations happen all over the world because of people's hangups about sex and purity - cut off the clitoris so that girls won't desire sex as much and remain "pure" - I'm sorry, but this disgusts me. Actually I'm not sorry at all.

Anyway, enough ranting. I need to go masturbate to someone I've never masturbate to before .. hmm.. let's see. Ashlee Simpson (post nosejob). Yeah, there goes my Ashlee Simpson fantasy virginity. I feel so impure!

[TwoLittleBirds]

Sugar,
In addition to looking for sexual exploration, could there be something else you are seeking, too?

You've mentioned community and family a couple of times. Explore your sexuality. Great. But that may not be the only place in your life something is missing. You may need to do some introspection. Is there something missing? Friends, God or spirituality, social interaction, some sense of fulfillment or reward? How about that LTR you've mentioned? Are you very picky? A little afraid? Been hurt?

Oops. Lots of questions! Sorry. And you don't have to supply answers on the board; but some of them may at least be worth thinking about as you search for what will make you truly happy.

The boy part of Two Little Birds 2LB (where the girl half helped me realize my potential and find my true heart)

[sapphire68]

I would think one would want to be seriously experienced to enter in to the swinging lifestyle, but that's JMHO. I'm new to this although my husband allowed me to go out with other men before we were married. I have a lot more experience now after 24 yrs of sexual encounters.

[Bad Sandy]

wow, I know I'm new to the board but red flags are jumping out everywhere here! This seems a bit like the Clinton thing... "it depends on what the definition of 'is' is..."

Why do you want to remain a virgin? As mentioned by others I don't think a future husband will be impressed with vaginal purity if every other sexual aspect has been explored. If it's for religious reasons... ditto. If you're just frightened because you've gone this long without intercouse, I sympathize but think what you're doing is much scarier than just having sex. When all is said and done, I agree with the fetish theory. Good luck!