Can we request the removal of a certification of us on Swing Lifestyle?

[PB&J]

Well, here goes. We met a couple online, went out for drinks, clicked, and starting that night played a total of three times. They quickly certified us on Swing Lifestyle, all good.

Well, several months on, after those few double dates and a couple of solo plays with him, things slowed down and seemed to be getting potentially dramatic, but he was still after me at least once a week to play alone, and it just hasn't happened for a variety of reasons. She had decided PB wasn't rough enough for her, but then seemed to blow hot and cold on playing with him. THEN, we got an email today saying that I have been incredibly rude to her on several occasions (ummm... NOT!) and that they have no interest in playing with us ever again, which is a pity because she and PB clicked so well (says she... PB is chuckling over that one).

We've heard the incredibly rude other woman story before from them, about someone he was fuck-buddies with before her (oh yes, new couple here- there's another lesson learned) so it seems to be jealous girlfriend syndrome. Oh well, we're not crying over it, but here's my question: can we request the removal of a certification of us on Swing Lifestyle? I don't feel right having this glowing review from them after receiving the email I did this morning.

[sweet_tna]

Ugh, sorry that had to happen to you. I checked under the "help" section of Swing Lifestyle and it says:

Can I remove/delete a certification?
Yes, you can remove a certification that you have left a member or one that someone has left you. Click the "Tools" button on the left menu and then click the "My Certifications" link. You will see a list of certifications that you have given out and that other members have given you and you can click on the "Remove" or "Delete" links under the corresponding certifications to delete them.

=)

[Spoomonkey]

We've had some really, REALLY crazy things happen after a couple certifies us. The weirdest was when a wife claimed that Mrs Spoo and her hubby were having an affair and subsequently attempted to stab said hubby with a steak knife.

Oh - we really didn't see that one coming.

So I feel your pain.

I think in all we've received 10 certifications and currently have only three up. I did find the directions below, if it helps.

Good luck! Sorry for the drama.

Spoomonkey

From Swing Lifestyle:

Can I remove/delete a certification?
Yes, you can remove a certification that you have left a member or one that someone has left you. Click the "Tools" button on the left menu and then click the "My Certifications" link. You will see a list of certifications that you have given out and that other members have given you and you can click on the "Remove" or "Delete" links under the corresponding certifications to delete them.

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by sweet_tna

Ugh, sorry that had to happen to you. But the good news is that you can remove their cert.



=)

Dang it Sweet... You beat me to it...

But I prefer when the lady gets there first.

Spoomonkey

[sweet_tna]

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

Dang it Sweet... You beat me to it...

But I prefer when the lady gets there first.

Spoomonkey

Oddly enough, so do I.

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by sweet_tna

Oddly enough, so do I.

Huh... Well what'd'ya know...



Spoomonkey

[PB&J]

Thank you, sweet and spoo, for the advice and the commiseration. Our certs are now pruned down to one, but it's a quality one! (and I prefer it too)

[realcplub2]

Well, now kiddies, there is the Y'see timmy moment in the thread...

SNIP
Well, several months on, after those few double dates and a couple of solo plays with him, things slowed down and seemed to be getting potentially dramatic, but he was still after me at least once a week to play alone,

SNIP

RED FLAG ON THE PLAY !!!!!

and it just hasn't happened for a variety of reasons. She had decided PB wasn't rough enough for her, but then seemed to blow hot and cold on playing with him. THEN, we got an email today saying that I have been incredibly rude to her on several occasions (ummm... NOT!) and that they have no interest in playing with us ever again, which is a pity because she and PB clicked so well (says she... PB is chuckling over that one).

Cant imagine the problem were coming from the other side, and the lack of communication?

We've heard the incredibly rude other woman story before from them, about someone he was fuck-buddies with before her (oh yes, new couple here- there's another lesson learned) so it seems to be jealous girlfriend syndrome.

Y'see timmy, its all happend before.. and you even gave the answer to the question before you finished writing the post..

So what have we really learned?

Umm.. maybe the playing seperately with members of the other team aint always a good thing? Cant imagine anyone not having issues with a guy who previously cheated playing seperately with members of a swinging couple that you played with previously??

Of course she is going to come up with other excuses, as to why they are breaking it off.. it has nothing to do with the fact that she has trust issues..

Live, Learn...

Do not rinse and repeat

[PB&J]

Oh I know, it wasn't working out. Really, the email yesterday was a relief.

He hadn't been cheating on his girlfriend with the casual fuck-buddy though- that girl had been around before he got together with current girlfriend, and he had just hoped that it would be able to continue, as he wanted an open relationship. But I guess sparks flew when the two girls met...

Basically we think that what had happened was that she had agreed to swinging so that he would decide to move their relationship up a notch to a more serious commitment, but while he was really gung-ho for it, and apparently she had no trouble with MFMs, she really didn't like to see him playing with other women- alone OR with him around. She did know when we played solo- I wasn't helping him cheat. But while she was saying it was ok, it wasn't really. Which is why I haven't agreed to anything for 6 months, since things started to get... strange...

I know, I know, we have learned a valuable lesson here. I think that "no new couples" has moved right up to the top!

[CXXC]

We are so very sorry that you had to experience that. Drama is such an unfortunate thing!

As for the NO NEW COUPLES thought. I have to think back to our humble beginnings. We were once all NEW! If everyone felt this way toward new couples, no one would be in the lifestyle! I dont know! It a difficult decision. Thi is one reason why we take as long as we do to finally meet the other couple. We chat, e-mail and have phone conversations for a bit before we make any moves forward! So far, we have been lucky and have not had any drama.

[The Fuse]

Sorry that happened to you. I'm glad you don't seem to be taking it personally.

[PB&J]

CXXC... by no NEW couples, I mean couples who are new to each other, not the lifestyle. These people hadn't known each other long enough to start reaching out to others, IMHO. She was still too insecure about the primary relationship. Newbies welcome otherwise...

Fuse...thanks, and yes it actually gave PB and me a chance to have a chuckle together over it. No hard feelings at our end at all.

[JustAskJulie]

Dont'cha just hate it when you post a reply and then close the window before hitting submit... yeah I do.

Anyway, glad you explained that she knew you were playing solo. My initial thought was that that was the issue (that he was going behind her back and then lied to her about it when she realized there were conversations going on that she wasn't involved in). As for the new (to each other) couples, this is why we it seems like we are constantly advising some new (to each other) couple on here to hold off on swinging for a while until they have their own relationship established.

[xxxboxy]

We don't play with couples that are new to each other and carefully select those who are just attached...both are prone to drama in our opinion.

[realcplub2]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

Dont'cha just hate it when you post a reply and then close the window before hitting submit... yeah I do.

Anyway, glad you explained that she knew you were playing solo. My initial thought was that that was the issue (that he was going behind her back and then lied to her about it when she realized there were conversations going on that she wasn't involved in). As for the new (to each other) couples, this is why we it seems like we are constantly advising some new (to each other) couple on here to hold off on swinging for a while until they have their own relationship established.

I hate to disagree Julie but the guys playing solo is the whole issue, the girlfriend KNOWING it is the crux of the problem..

Judging from the posts.. and its a knee jerk reaction.. This doesnt seem to be a consentual thing rather a "doing it because he wants to"

1. Take the whole history of a prior "fuck buddy"

2. The Girlfriends complaints and (Again reading between the lines) lack luster participation in the group fun..

3. And the emails coming from her, with her attempt to place the blame elsewhere..

Being new had little to do with it.. They had issues well before you went on your first date PB&J..

How about this.. think a little differently.,. Taking a newbie under your wing and being the first to take thier cherries... you get the chance to "teach them" the proper etiquette within the lifestyle..

And remember, we all had to start somewhere