No single males? Why not??

[mrbondvn]

I do not have any problem with single males. In fact, I and my gf love them. We don't care they respect me or not. The important thing is how can they serve my lady. We do swing with single males all the time. Actually, we enjoy long term buddy rather than random guy in club.

[crazycatz]

Originally Posted by mrbondvn

We don't care they respect me or not. T

that's a bit worrying, to say the least.

[BigirlandHubby]

if there were not restrictions on single males you would end up with a 40 to 1 ratio of men to women, and a bunch of single guys thinking it's a meat market. Just go on AFF and check out who is "camming" right now... 4000 men, and 45 women... the 4000 men have an average of .01 viewers and the 45 women have an average of 150 people watching.

Guys don't get it, single men are SO easy to find that when you go looking, that alone is a turn off. You simply don't need or want them coming after you, if we wanted a single guy, we could go to any bar on the planet and pick up the best looking single guy in the place and take him home (if you are a moderately attractive couple and approach a single guy for no-strings attached sex, chances are they will say "uhm... yes")..

That's why there are restrictions, we go to a swinger club we are there to find women with men, or women. If we were looking for single men, we could go anywhere, or ask any of our single male friends who we already know and trust (which is Waaaay more likely than a stranger).

On the whole, single guys get blasted, act like idiots, think that it's ok to jump in and play without asking, start fights, or think they are so hot they can just run up and start rubbing on a guy's wife. The only time we went to a place that allowed single guys there were fights all over the place, and drunk guys acting like grope-happy tools in a meat market where everything is free and they are god's gift. Never again.

[Chris&Amelia]

Ah, the ever-dreaded Single Male. Let me preface by saying that I, personally, have no problems with single males. Heck, I was once a single male myself (a long story) back in my younger days. But why aren’t we interested in single men?

Most importantly, is because Amelia simply has no desire to have a single guy join us. That may change one day, but right now that’s how it is. She likes playing with women and seeing me with other women. We also like the erotic dynamics of a foursome. And it’s really as simple as that.

Now, if Brad Pitt showed up on our doorstep and said he was interested in a MFM, I’m pretty sure she would reevaluate this outlook.

Also, it appears at times that single men in the Lifestyle tend to be rather boorish, demonstrating that attitude that all Swinger husbands are tickled silly at the thought of some random guy banging his wife. Before you fire up the flamethrower, I realize that this is not indicative of all single men. Most of the single guys here on SwingersBoard seem to be pretty swell fellows, for example.

I had one single male e-mail us on SLS, telling us that “I read your profile and it’s hot”. Now, this was rather confusing because if he read our profile, he would have seen the part where we say we are not interested in single men. Also, I wrote 99% of the profile and even I don’t think it’s “hot”.

Anyway, he goes on at some length about the size of his genitalia, how he has received rave reviews about his oral skills, and how we would love to come over and show her “a night she’ll never forget.” Attached to this e-mail is a picture of a rather impressive-sized penis that I’m willing to bet money was screen-capped from a porno movie.

So I send him a reply, which states “Sorry, we’re not interested in single men at the moment, but we wish you luck on your endeavor.” His reply was “Whatever, your woman should dump your fat ass and find a real man.” Charming, to say the least!

Now, I realize that the type of guy who likes to spam SLS profiles is probably a douche to begin with, but it really gives a bad impression of all single men. And anybody who’s been to Hedo can tell you about the Vinnies and Wallies (singles guys who either think they’re God’s Gift To Women or creepy loners who like to stare and watch, usually while playing with themselves.)

And, finally, as somebody else already mentioned, it’s a simple matter of supply and demand. If we want a single man to join us, I imagine it’s almost trivially easy to find one.

[SCcpl40]

Sometimes single men think with one head when they should be thinking with two. That may be where the saying "two heads are better than one" came from. For MFM, it's all about the woman. The seduction of being the center of attention is overwhelming. Keep focused on the objective, which is the woman, don't let the "hard" head cloud your vision which could be either one. The moment it's not about her, you're going down in flames.
__________________

[Thrax]

Originally Posted by SCcpl40

Sometimes single men think with one head when they should be thinking with two.

Sometimes single men think with one head when they should be thinking with two.

C'mon! We're picked on enough!

Thrax

[WildMainePussy]

Originally Posted by SCcpl40

The seduction of being the center of attention is overwhelming. Keep focused on the objective, which is the woman. The moment it's not about her, you're going down in flames.
__________________

Yup....and already one fella has me flicking my BIC.

Last time my head was grabbed and shoved around while giving him oral and he was too ready to cum. Short (like 2 inch) strokes sporadically weren't long enough or steady enough for me to even begin to focus on enjoying feeling anything and it was over very quickly. He noted I didn't cum. But not wanting to hurt his feelings (or show I was annoyed) I said everyone's entitled to an off night now and then.

We do refuse single guys as we prefer couples more but this fellow we've known for about 3 years. Nice guy to talk with, we've become very comfortable with him but the last two times...it's been a bit off.

What's that rule...three strikes and you're outta the game?

It is so hard to find a single guy that my partner will go along with. He has to be fairly intelligent, not a sports nut (we don't do NASCAR or footie) but does like more of the cultural arts -- music, theater, books etc.
That way there's something to talk about over dinner!!

[sweet_tna]

Seems to me the single male debate is like any other aspect of life--a few bad apples spoil the bunch. We haven't had any problems with single males, but we aren't looking for them either. We don't have an issue with them in any way, it's just not the direction Mr. Sweet and I are looking to go at this point.

But we have encountered our share of MARRIED men that were total jerks. Takes all kinds . . .

=)

[BigirlandHubby]

Originally Posted by SCcpl40

Sometimes single men think with one head when they should be thinking with two. That may be where the saying "two heads are better than one" came from.

We are laughing our asses off!!! WELL PLAYED!!! That is the quote of the month.

Our first MMF was with a very close friend of Hubby.. He has an IQ in the high 150s, is in amazing shape, is into the arts, and is one of the most fun guys we have ever met (he throws a party in Vancouver every year that, I shit you not, people fly in from as far as Texas for). He is well hung, gentle in bed, can last as long as we want him to, and is pretty much the perfect guy because he is bi and makes the whole night about HER and US, it wasn't about him at all, he was basically a living sex toy for us, and loved being that FOR US. It was really incredible, and we had him back 4 times before we moved from Vancouver (we still miss him)... Those guys are SO RARE! But if you want to be a single male, you need to be like him. A meathead steroid jock with a giant cock is not what couple are looking for. It's not about jealousy, it's about you being a dill-hole and not appreciating the fact that you are a sex toy in the bedroom and maybe a good friend outside of that, but being there for her not for you!

Most of us guys in (at least the ones I have met) in the lifestyle are there for the women, we are there to revel in the beauty of our bisexual wives. In bed, when I cum it's like "shit, it's over", when I make or help make a woman cum, I feel fulfilled. That's the kind of lover I have always been. If you want to be a single male in this lifestyle and be successful I think that's the kind of man you need to be (not try to be, I mean at the heart of you, you need to want to get her off more than getting off yourself, if that's not you, then you are not going to do well at all).

[two42lovers]

Question is, what is the solo guy bringing to the table? Part of the problem is supply and demand, but there is another issue. If most couples can attract other couples and singles, and most single women can attract couples and singles, what are we to assume about single guys unable attract play partners? He either doesn't want to, or he can't. If he doesn't want to, fine, but why the crying about it? If he can't, why should we invite him to play with us? (There may be a good answer, but let's hear it.) When we play with another couple, we get FMF, MFM, MFFM, & MF/MF. Nothing wrong with just having MFM - but there are a lot of available guys for this relatively small peice of the swing lifestyle. If you are a solo guy, best bet is to get out there and find a play partner, and enjoy the wonderful world of swinging.

We know a few very cool single guys who seem to have no trouble attracting couples for MFM play, and attracting single women to bring to our parties. Sad to say, however, high quality solo guys skilled at playing with couples are rare.

[lalov3r]

ummm. i think it means no need to bring suasage to the sausage factory..


(sausage factory was a joke we made with friend, when at a club there would be very few women and all guys)

[NumbskullsX2]

I totally agree with everything you said, for the reasons you said. But there is a place for them in the lifestyle, and here is why-

Originally Posted by two42lovers

Question is, what is the solo guy bringing to the table? Part of the problem is supply and demand, but there is another issue. If most couples can attract other couples and singles, and most single women can attract couples and singles, what are we to assume about single guys unable attract play partners?

Not all couples can attract other couples, sometimes one or both of them have either let themselves go physically, or they're just "rough" if you know what I mean. A single woman might be very nice person and all, but in most bars and vanilla clubs there's a threshold of looks and age and once they're past it, they can sit there all night and not be noticed. But a swing club is a great equalizer. There they can be 75 years old and weight 300 pounds and there will still be some single guy trying to get them into a room. So I guess you could say that what the single guy "brings to the table" is that in a swing club at least, he'll have sex with a woman he probably wouldn't be caught dead with in front of his friends.

Originally Posted by two42lovers

why should we invite him to play with us? (There may be a good answer, but let's hear it.) When we play with another couple, we get FMF, MFM, MFFM, & MF/MF. Nothing wrong with just having MFM - but there are a lot of available guys for this relatively small peice of the swing lifestyle. If you are a solo guy, best bet is to get out there and find a play partner, and join the wonderful world of 2-on-2 swinging.

But some couples don't want 2-on-2 swinging, they want another male because that's what turns them both on. In that case, having another mans penis is more of a turn-on than having a penis and a vagina.

Why waste a perfectly good vagina on a husband who doesn't appreciate it?

[Thrax]

Originally Posted by NumbskullsX2

I totally agree with everything you said, for the reasons you said. But there is a place for them in the lifestyle, and here is why-Not all couples can attract other couples, sometimes one or both of them have either let themselves go physically, or they're just "rough" if you know what I mean. A single woman might be very nice person and all, but in most bars and vanilla clubs there's a threshold of looks and age and once they're past it, they can sit there all night and not be noticed. But a swing club is a great equalizer. There they can be 75 years old and weight 300 pounds and there will still be some single guy trying to get them into a room. So I guess you could say that what the single guy "brings to the table" is that in a swing club at least, he'll have sex with a woman he probably wouldn't be caught dead with in front of his friends.But some couples don't want 2-on-2 swinging, they want another male because that's what turns them both on. In that case, having another mans penis is more of a turn-on than having a penis and a vagina.

Why waste a perfectly good vagina on a husband who doesn't appreciate it?

You, sir, are a HOOT!



Thrax

[lovinher]

Originally Posted by SCcpl40

Sometimes single men think with one head when they should be thinking with two. That may be where the saying "two heads are better than one" came from.

Hey, isn't two heads what it is all about?
As long as there are people (and clubs) who tolerate the the jerks, there will always be jerks in the lifestyle. I think if couples were a bit more selective they would find that there are some good ones out there. I have no sympathy for anyone who picks up a guy at a club they don't know at all, only find out he's a jerk after the fact. There is nothing wrong with an anonomous fuck but your rolling the dice in doing so. Think about why many single guys, or women for that matter, are there in the first place. I said MANY, not all......Thrax.

[VegasLee]

I agree 100% with what lovinher just posted.

Something that needs to be added though is that everywhere you wrote "single" the word couples can be inserted also.

Being a jerk is not exclusive to just "singles." At the club and conventions and parties we have met just as many couples or part of a couple that are jerks as we have single people over the years.

If clubs need to start being selective then they need to include everyone, single or couple in that selection process. I am using the term "single" for single men and single women. We have found that single women can cause more drama in a club then any single man ever thought of causing.