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| Singles & Swinging Questions about and Topics concerning Singles and Swinging - and Swinging Single. |
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| | #1 (permalink) |
| Here to Stay Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 13 Location: boston Status: single male
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Hello im 26 year old male from boston massachusetts. im new to the site too. ive never experienced swinging. but for some reason i am fascinated by orgies thats why i think i might like swinging. i found a site online before that organizes local parties in my area. they say however if you are a guy then usually you need to get invited by a female. Any input into the swinging world? ive watched documentaries on swinging and im so into it. Any females in the boston area that would like to chat. comment or send me a Private message. thank you |
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| | #2 (permalink) |
| Doing it our way... |
First, welcome to the Board! Second, I really suggest that you start reading. We can't give you the Cliff Notes to swinging. You need to go check out the archives, the Singles forum, and definitely the "Advice for Single Males" thread, located here. If you have specific questions, please feel free to ask. But "input into the swinging world" is really broad, and at least the thread for single males would be good place to start reading, and then let us know what you'd like in-depth advice or thoughts on? |
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__________________ I'll give up my bad habits as soon as equally satisfying good habits become available. A. Brilliant | |
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| | #3 (permalink) |
| Julie's Helper Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 6,487 Location: Behind door #2 Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:mrmrsfun
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Welcome to the Swingers Board. You will find this a good place to read and understand. If you don't, its at your own peril. |
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| | #4 (permalink) |
| I'll think about it Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 10,099 Location: With Wild Things Status: Married Female
| Hi & Welcome to the Board. I'm very interested in knowing what documentaries on swinging you have watched. Would appreciate it if you could list these documentaries--by name--and where you came upon them. Thanks! LM |
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| | #5 (permalink) |
| Has Left the Building Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 832 Location: State of bliss Status: couple
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I'll try my best to give you the Cliff Notes but as others have suggested the concept of swinging (aka "the lifestyle") is so broad it is difficult to sum up in a nutshell. Since you specifically mentioned orgys and swapping as opposed to just "picking up chicks" I think I can scratch the surface and give you some info. In many ways swinging is about couples sharing and exploring their sexuality together and having sexual adventures together as a couple. Couples can swap and enter into orgys and group encounters because they have something to bring to the table. Single men have often been refered to as coming to a pot luck and only bringing an appetite but nothing to offer. The role of a single male in the lifestyle is often that of being an extra male for a couple's MFM or to be another dick for a gangbang. Many clubs do not allow single males into orgy rooms if they allow single males at all. Many people that host private parties and getherings will also not allow single males or will only invite single males that they know and have played with personally and even then the single males are restricted to only playing with people that directly invite them to play. Nowhere on the planet will you recieve an open invitation to come in and fuck everyone else's wife while you bring nothing to the table to offer yourself. The lifestyle is very female-centric and female oriented and singles males are just on the fringes of lifestyle at best. Again the roles of single males are often providing an extra set of hands, tongue and dick to a MFM or gang bang. My suggestion is to do a lot more research, read everything you can on this and other boards. Especially read everything in the single male section. Go ahead and put up a single male profile on a lifestyle website and see if there are any clubs in your area that allow single males. If there are and you go make sure you are fully aware of all of the rules and expectations of single males and follow them to the letter. It may not be fair or right but single males are often second class citizens in the lifestyle and they have a few specific roles. The males that do understand the roles and "get it" as far as what their restrictions and expectations are can be quite successfull. The ones that think the swinging community is just made up of a bunch of sluts and and people that are oversexed and without standards and moral character will go down in flames in no time. |
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| | #6 (permalink) |
| Has Left the Building Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 832 Location: State of bliss Status: couple
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Oh, also you mentioned looking for a female so you can get invited. Keep in mind that for every single female that would consider going to club there are probably a hundred if not a thousand single guys wanting her to take them so they can get in. Many females do not want to see themselves as just some "ticket" so that some guy can get into a club and try to fuck chicks. Single fems have their own agendas and their reasons for doing things and getting you into a club probably isn't one of them. A single fem will be 10,000 times more popular and have a ton more opportunity by going by herself rather than dragging along the extra baggage of some single male wannabe. Also, when people inside the club find out that a couple is just a single male being brought in by a "ticket" they are shunned and looked down on more than just a regular single guy and people will try and lure the female away from you to play with her by herself. In otherwords they will not see you as a legitimate couple anyway even if you do manage to get in. It can be done however and there have been people that have done it but don't plan on it being quick or easy or something that happens very often. |
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| | #7 (permalink) |
| Here to Stay Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 74 Location: Michigan Status: Single Male Swing Lifestyle Name:ABSingleMan
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Hi, jhitch82. I've been doing this off and on since 1985 and I can tell you it is way easier to find and get invited to orgies held and organized by single women than it is to get involved in swinging. The trick is to focus on learning about the women you meet and not just trying to get them into bed. The catch is that you have to try to get them into bed WHILE you are learning about them and make them know you seriously want to learn about them as much, if not more, than you want to get them into bed. Sound familiar? Swinging is about fantasy fulfillment, and in the current environment it is about the fantasies of couples and women, not single men. Deal with it like a man. Learn all you can, try different approaches that are comfortable to you, and remember what works and what doesn't work. Swinging can be done by single men, and contrary to popular belief, you don't have to be rich, possess an 9 inch or larger penis, or look like Brad Pitt. You just have to be the person others want to be with because they feel you will help them fulfill their fantasies. If you don't fit the bill, move on and don't worry so much about why. Look at the posts by Thrax and EternallySingle for insight on how it should (and shouldn't) be done and what to expect. |
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| | #8 (permalink) | |
| Has Left the Building Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 832 Location: State of bliss Status: couple
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Absingleman said it nicer and more politically correct than I did but I think we are saying the same thing. He is saying it from the perspective of a single male in the lifestyle and I am saying it from the perspective of a male half of a couple. Basically it all boils down to if you want to be a hired cock (but without recieving any money) for a couple to be the extra person for their MFM or if you want to stand in line for some gals gang bang, then you may be in business if you do everything just right. If on the other hand if you want to call your own shots and have some kind of voice in the matter then get a girlfriend and eventually get married and have some kids and mortgage and a minivan and maybe some day she will consider swinging at some point....at least that's how it worked for me | |
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