Looking for the single male

[TravlParty]

I definitely got the feeling that they were not acceptable to our friends, because they played too much. By "players" they meant that they had too many "experiences."

Well, it only makes sense to me since they play together as singles. Duh!! Almost everyone is looking for a single female. That's the whole reason I contacted her in the first place, so that hubby would have a playmate. It's not been easy for him to find a lady he wanted a second time. He really really liked her too.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

What was your interpretation of the word "players?"

I ask because I'm not clear on what that means and wonder what they meant.

What would you have to discover about Exec and his girlfriend for you to term them as players?

LM

Originally Posted by TravlParty

I definitely got the feeling that they were not acceptable to our friends, because they played too much. By "players" they meant that they had too many "experiences."

Well, it only makes sense to me since they play together as singles. Duh!! Almost everyone is looking for a single female. That's the whole reason I contacted her in the first place, so that hubby would have a playmate. It's not been easy for him to find a lady he wanted a second time. He really really liked her too.

I was wondering about this as well. I wouldn't worry about what other people think. As for the cert thing, like Fun4Ds said, is there a really good reason to post it? Do you normally accept certs from everyone who gives them? I don't think that worrying about what others think is a good reason to NOT accept it though. There are always going to be those who may think you play too much or that you do this or do that. No one really knows how you play other than yourselves.... and no one really needs to know. They'll make their assumptions whether you provide them with ammunition to do so or not.

PS. I'm glad you had a great time with Exec and that's really all that matters here. I think your friends were being childish by not wanting to sit with you becuase they were there. But on the other hand, it may have worked out for the best... sometimes 3 (couples) can be a crowd.

[magnum]

Originally Posted by TravlParty

So, this is probably new. I'm actually looking to replace a regular single male (due to his work schedule changing). Damn, when I finally found one that I liked. He was respectful, nice, clean, and great in bed. Sigh

I'm giving each one a nickname to keep them straight in this story.

I started looking two days ago online at two different sites. Here's my experience so far.

1 - "Boater" male who was part of a swinging couple. He has all the right attributes, but can't get away often (job).

2 - "Fireman" brand new to lifestyle male. Great looking and speaks well (on chat), but has no idea. Doesn't like the idea of on-premise clubs (they're not friendly to single males, he says). We don't want to invite a complete stranger to our hotel room. Is that odd?

3 - "Trucker" overly aggressive guy, freaked out because I didn't answer his IM right away. I wasn't even online when he text me. Geez!

4 - "Exec" Nice looking gentleman plays with a girlfriend (both straight). This is the most promising. Made a date at the club. Fingers crossed.


The initial meets will happen this weekend. Will let you know how things go.

Just wondering - how does everyone else approach single males? How do you nicely tell them there's no chemistry? I'm usually very direct, but don't want to hurt feelings either. Also, the last thing I need is another stalker (been there).

I thought about calling girlfriends to ask for references, and did talk to a couple. They couldn't give me anyone they would recommend.

I'm surprised at how difficult this is.



Mrs. T

Being a single male, I think you are going about it the correct way.

Make plans to meet for drinks, if you are attracted physically to him, if your conversation is comfortable, you call the shots. If you do not like him, be polite but direct and say thank you but no thanks. I assume your husband/bf will be there to watch your back so to speak if he is weird.

How did your search turn out? Any luck meeting the "new" single guy?

[TravlParty]

Fun4Ds - no, we don't need the cert, but I didn't want to deny it and risk hurting a good thing. We decided to accept it because damn they were fun!

Our "friends" haven't spoken to us since this incident. Oh well, they're problem, not ours. I told them before we went out that we were looking for single male friends for me, as hubby was in MFM fantasy mode.

Magnum - Thank you for confirming from a single male point of view. I appreciate your viewpoint. Yes, the one I called "exec" and his significant other worked out great! We'll see them again.

I also have another hot friend, but timing is difficult with his travel/job.

[magnum]

Originally Posted by TravlParty

Fun4Ds - no, we don't need the cert, but I didn't want to deny it and risk hurting a good thing. We decided to accept it because damn they were fun!

Our "friends" haven't spoken to us since this incident. Oh well, they're problem, not ours. I told them before we went out that we were looking for single male friends for me, as hubby was in MFM fantasy mode.

Magnum - Thank you for confirming from a single male point of view. I appreciate your viewpoint. Yes, the one I called "exec" and his significant other worked out great! We'll see them again.

I also have another hot friend, but timing is difficult with his travel/job.

Your welcome, glad it worked out for you, keep us posted...

If I was closer to you I would like to throw my hat in the ring as a possible play mate, nice photo/body on your profile page, if you are open to interracial MFM play dates.

[TravlParty]

This weekend turned out to be a surprise. We went away for a romantic weekend, just the two of us. No intention of meeting anyone, just have fun.

At the club, we run into a guy that we've known for 3 years. Single male, long-time lifestyle, fifty-two, and ex-navy. So, we start talking and find out we're both engineers. Cool. We have great conversation, and I'm having a blast dancing with the ladies. He's watching, but I didn't realize.

Toward the end of the evening, we're asked to join a two-couple group. We talk about it and agree. He was the most fun I've had in quite awhile! Damn, and we've been friends all this time.

Hidden gems.

Unfortunately, hubby didn't have a great time, but was happy that I finally did after several less than satisfactory hook-ups.

if you are open to interracial MFM play dates

Chemistry is chemistry - ethnicity is not an issue.