Single Males, would you consider soft-swinging with a couple?

[absingleman]

I must be the exception to the single male stereotype. I was at a bar and an attractive woman just came up and asked me if I wanted to have sex and I said "Not tonight". I must have stood out or she saw me as a challenge because she suddenly became a regular and kept at me until I said yes. It was only two weeks (the bar was around the corner from my apartment so I went there everyday after work before returning to heat up ravioli or Chinese leftovers) but I actually got off on this woman (who I found out was a local radio DJ) pursuing me. Since that time, if a woman makes the first move, I look at her breasts. If I see nipples, I flip a coin. Heads is yes, tails is no. If I don't, I say "No, but lets talk", because I know she will be back sooner or later.

Conceited? Maybe, but thats been my experience.

Oh, this was about a swing club? well, in that case, I think I would still do the "Not right now, but lets talk." In that environment, I know she can have sex and she SHOULD know she can have sex with little effort, so if I have to be on my best behavior and make the best impression I can, she should too.

Hey, I believe in equal sexual rights for women. They need to work just as hard as I do (yeah, right hahahahaha).

[CoupleReady2]

I'd be fine with that..We're a couple, and that would still be exciting for me and for the wife also.

[fun4Ds]

Originally Posted by K&JIntimates

It was a Sunday night and pretty dead. We had gone into one of the big playrooms without a door and it was just us for a long time. It was when I was on top that two guys came and joined us. I was okay with them touching me but was a little nervous about doing likewise. I wasn't sure how far I wanted things to go and I wanted to talk to K before just leaning over and sucking the guy closest.

To date a MFM has just been sexy pillow talk. It's hot to think of two men at once but, I'll admit, the reality makes me a bit nervous.

That's why I'm interested in baby steps see related post.

Oh wow, I see what your saying.....

One thing I have to say is. At times like this, you actually have power and controll. How does that make you feel ? Do you feel like you have controll of the situation ?

[exhibi]

I'd certainly be 'up' for it, I would hope that she'd like what she finds and decide to go the distance.

[Frankie]

Wow I wish I had an offer like this offered to me,Yes it would be a huge turn on for me.

Frankie

[K&JIntimates]

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

Oh wow, I see what your saying.....

One thing I have to say is. At times like this, you actually have power and controll. How does that make you feel ? Do you feel like you have controll of the situation ?

In the situation I described, part of the appeal is knowing that the control is mine. My nervousness with jumping right in with another male is the fact that I don't know him well enough to know that he'll be a good compliment. I want to know that whomever we have our MFM with can be trusted to play at my pace.

[gdjohn48]

I would be willing to play, No matter how far it went. I think it would be a compliment to me and God knows, Im not shy. Thanks G

[magnum]

Originally Posted by K&JIntimates

Any feedback from couples who've had experience with this is welcome.

Recently K and I experimented with single males. We were in an area open to all and were joined by two men. It was a baby step as we were open to them caressing me while we were err....occupied, something I enjoyed very much.

My question is....

If a couple approached you (a man), explaining that the wife would like to touch and caress (and maybe a little more) your parts under the towel but made it clear this was their first time and didn't know where the threshold of comfort was would you be willing to play?

~J

I would probably play, if I was attracted to her, since she wanted to "touch" me, I assume she is attracted to me...

[ENCRYPTEDTX]

K&JIntimates,

I am a single respectful single male in the lifestyle with a fair share of experience with couples and in club settings.

I dont have to tell you that anything you do, you must be fully comfortable doing. You must also remember that your fantasies, and your play are for you. It is your comfort and your fantasy that matter.

Any respectable single male understands his role. His role is what the couple (particularly her) desires. At any given time, should your comfort be compromised, the gig is up.

That being said, you should also convey somehow that you only want to touch, and not be touched back. Its very simple. You are in said act, guys approach, you reach, you tell them you are only comfortable touching them.

GROUND RULES ESTABLISHED.

Players may choose to continue said game, or take bats, balls and go home or to a different venue.

By not communicating, you are sending a mixed signal. I always ask before touching, and yes it can be a chore to shift focus from the "game" to heckler on the sideline, but its necessary for permission and leads into the ground rules.

I am also a pleaser. I enjoy seeing the couple happy. Heck if you want me to stand in the corner and do a naked yoga pose, thats your prerogative.

What a lot of single guys fail to understand about couples and the lifestyle is that the couple sets the guidelines and is in total control.

To answer your question, I would love to play. Its about the enjoyment of others and not just my own.

Kyle

[funn]

My wife and I decided to soft swap with a friend of mine. She was never interested in full with other men. My friend was more than happy just to do soft with her. After our first soft MMF with my wife she decided to go full with him. I guess his patience payed off. Now he's a regular fuck buddy for my wife.

[sahajacpl]

Originally Posted by K&JIntimates

If a couple approached you (a man), explaining that the wife would like to touch and caress (and maybe a little more) your parts under the towel but made it clear this was their first time and didn't know where the threshold of comfort was would you be willing to play?~J

We would love to work out the limits of play and enjoy a quid-quo-pro, whereever it leads, just foreplay or a good session fucking the wife, if they (husband and wife) agree.

[SecretAsianMan]

As a single guy - I'm usually pretty open to whatever limits a couple sets when they invite me to play with them... taking cues from them & letting them "set the pace"

[rahul4sex]

Single guy's would be ready for sure any time ...

[DarkVoyuer]

Originally Posted by absingleman

I must be the exception to the single male stereotype. I was at a bar and an attractive woman just came up and asked me if I wanted to have sex and I said "Not tonight".

I know several men who have shot down attractive woman who asked for sex. Perhaps this annoying male stereotype is not as strong as it is projected. Did you want to have sex with her?

I must have stood out or she saw me as a challenge because she suddenly became a regular and kept at me until I said yes. It was only two weeks (the bar was around the corner from my apartment so I went there everyday after work before returning to heat up ravioli or Chinese leftovers) but I actually got off on this woman (who I found out was a local radio DJ) pursuing me. Since that time, if a woman makes the first move, I look at her breasts. If I see nipples, I flip a coin. Heads is yes, tails is no. If I don't, I say "No, but lets talk", because I know she will be back sooner or later.
Conceited? Maybe, but thats been my experience.

You know I have had sexual fantasies of rejecting beautiful women by using the same game you are playing. I guess I get annoyed at the stereotype that men can not have sexual power in that manner. Gender stereotypes just annoy. Perhaps I do not like to be viewed as simple. Ironically, I conform to many of the female stereotypes. I know some men who play this type of game. It's a little bit naughty, but it shows that men can leverage sexual power as well.

Oh, this was about a swing club? well, in that case, I think I would still do the "Not right now, but lets talk." In that environment, I know she can have sex and she SHOULD know she can have sex with little effort, so if I have to be on my best behavior and make the best impression I can, she should too.

I hate to say this, but men who know they can have sex with little effort are more likely to be called egomaniacs. Perhaps they are more blatant in their confidence. However, I am sure there are women who are as arrogant because they think or now they can have sex with little effort.

[DarkVoyuer]

Originally Posted by Chicup

This is a question only a woman would ask.

Woman: Hey guy wearing only a towel, can I touch your penis a bit, but I don't' want to do more?

Man: Yes.

You would have to make it clear how far you are looking to go but other than that, I rather doubt a single male at a swing club would answer no.

I can see several single males who would say no. If they do not find the woman attractive, all bets are off. If she is brutally stuck up, for some men, all bets are off. I am not saying many men would say yes. However, there will be men who are not attracted to the woman who said it.