The hypocrisy of SOME swingers

[Malachista]

Oh, single guys aren't the only ones that get threated rude by some couples.
I once got to meet a couple that got pretty nasty after I told them that I'm not interrested in FMF, but two hours later after I got to play with a single male they desperatley wanted to nudge in and swap.
This was very WTF-y as well as insulting to my attention span.

I also think that one should have the pride to turn people down who are first rude to you, but then are suddently interrested when you fall into their prey circle.

[fun4Ds]

Originally Posted by damayor

Thanks to all those who've replied. I'd especially like to thank Lee and Tribbles who took the time to read what I said and not just take it as a single male attempting to get pity.

No pity here . We like to think of ourselves as equal opportunity swingers

As far as the attractive/unattractive argument, was that even part of what I wrote? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder...I happen to prefer larger women, I happen to prefer women who have a bit of a geeky side.

Now see, it seems you do just like us. Except for being solo at times. But still, you go with hopes of what you have in mind. But then again sometimes things either change, from finding the one or ones throughout the evening. Or, something or someone unplanned just fortunatly..... Happens!

But that doesn't stop me, whether as a single or couple, from acting respectful of every new person I meet and welcoming them into the lifestyle (and no, this doesn't mean playing)

Its all good !

Some people replying seem to be under the impression that single guys are solely at a club to fuck. Well, here's a newsflash, there are some single males that "get it". I know that may shock some, but there are some out there that would like to be in the lifestyle with someone special, but just hasn't found that right one, so he chooses to go on his own instead of staying away.

I hate to give a news flash back. But, the last guy we played with has been in the lifestyle probably longer than you have. His partners have great things to say about him as well. How cool, we may encounter him with one of his partners sometime. A full swap. The thing is, we met him solely on the fact that he did want to fuck. At a moments short notice too.

So thats why I kind of followed your thread. I cant say he thought of us as hypocrites. I mean come on, we don't always pursue single males, single females or couples... We change from time to time. What we do is, talk about what we want for our fun time out. We are not for or against anything, we just have something that is at the top of our agenda for our time out. We are limited sometimes..... We cant do it all in a night out ya know.

I would think meeting you at a club might be an enjoyable conversation. If you strike Mrs.funs interests you may be invited to join us. But if not, Would you think we are hypocrites ? I would hope not ! We may encounter a couple that turns us down. It does happen, because they had their agenda. Maybe they were looking for a certain kind of couple or single, and we just didn't fit their bill. For what ever reasons.

Honestly, just like us, sometimes we have found that we miss opportunity because we let the general crowd or atmosphere, steer us away from the one or ones that are interested. I hate to say it, but if we sensed your feelings of judging us as hypocrits..... We might have just walked on by.

Hang in there, don't miss people like us, because the people like you are judging, are in the way .

[3sumff]

As a couple, this is why when we go to a party where "single males" are on the ticket we usually don't attend. Nothing against the single guys! Actually, we are open to the thought of MFM, but we have to be in the mood. Anyways!
In regards to couples throwing looks of disgust at single males. Remember what you signed up for. I am sure you have an idea of who will be attending the party. Simply don't go if you know there are going to be a lot of single guys attending. Saves everyone the headache of accusing anyone of hypocrisy.

[tribbles]

The way I've seen single males treated when single vs when with a female---

I've seen couples not even smile, much less say "how ya doing?" to the single guys. They move as far away as possible and even if all anyone is doing, is sitting around socializing and chatting about pets or work or traffic....they do not respond to any comments the single males make. But they interact with other couples while sitting in the same area where everyone is part of the ongoing conversation.

Then the single guys shows up with a gal. And all of a sudden these same couples care about how the traffic on the drive to the club was....or the weather....or whatever the topic happens to be is.....with lots of eye contact with the female the guy is with.

Talking about the weather or traffic with a single guy in a group setting anytime in an evening does not equal playing with the guy later. (Nor does it mean the couples who chatted about traffic are going to swap....right?)

So there is my example of rude.

[BiloxiCouple]

Swinging has revolved around the woman. You got one, you are swinging. If you don't you are single. You want my woman, I want yours. If she only wants two a single then you are the lucky one.

Sooner or later everyone is "rude" at some point. It's part of life.

[arvcpl]

Originally Posted by Alura

I go to the Porsche club meetings to talk to other Porsche owners because I'm interested in how they care for their cars, where the good parts prices are, and (rarely) to share a ride in each other's cars, if we're well acquainted.

If some gentleman shows up in a pickup truck and wants to talk about how the Dodge Ram is better than the Ford F-150, We'll be friendly but the Porsche owners won't spend much time talking with him.

If he drives in next month in a concourse 928S, he'll get all kinds of attention and so will his car.

What's not to understand?

Mr. Alura

Here's a better analogy, let's say you love Harleys and you love riding them but you don't own one yourself. If you went to a biker bar and were trying to ride other peoples how well do you think that would go over?

Now out of the 100 bikers that are in the bar maybe 3 or 4 would actually enjoy the attention you are paying to their bike and wouldn't mind taking you for a ride on the back of theirs (sharing) for a little spin and would enjoy the company and diversion.

And if you were really nice and hit it off and were showing yourself as sincere and genuine and were a respectfull and responsible person maybe 1 or 2 of those original 3 or 4 would let you take their bike for a spin on your own. But the other 95 would probably rather spit in your eye than let you touch their bike. I don't see this is as being any different in the lifestyle.

If you have been in the lifestyle this long you should already understand this and accept it. If I went to a club without my wife I would fully expect that I would be treated differently and I would accept it. I would also understand that even people we consider close lifestyle friends that we have played with regularly will treat me differently. That may not be right or rosey but it's the reality.

There would probably also be a few people that would come on to me that wouldn't give me the time of day if I was there with my wife also. It's all about preferences and the vast majority of people in the lifestyle prefer couples or single fems.

If you want to be a biker step #1 is GET A BIKE!