Swinging single females

[Tybee Swing]

Welcome, Karmickiss! Welcome

Originally Posted by Karmickiss

However,I do tend to have this feeling of "junior high" nervousness around people I'm attracted to, being a bit shy until I get to know someone better. At the same time I know I am a very sensual, and passionate person, and feel like I have very little out-let for that, and this is what is frustrating to me right now.

No worries, about being nervous - everybody is in the beginning. You can take things just as slow as you prefer, going at your own pace and no faster while getting to know new people. If they're worth knowing, they'll be patient and wait for a good thing.

Best wishes to you and have fun.

[MissKat]

As a single female I haven't always found a great level of acceptance from either couples or single men. I might serve a purpose for a lot of those people but I don't consider that to mesh with my definition of acceptance.

Single guys, on the whole, seem to think that because I swing it must mean I'm wanting sex with everyone, which couldn't be further from the truth. In short, if they don't call me a slut, that's generally the way they look at me. Now, while there are definately times that I love to feel slutty (and I don't apologise for that), there's a big difference to me between the way I can feel and the way someone treats me. A lack of respect probably sums it up best.

With some couples there's definately been a degree of suspicion regarding my motives for swinging, probably made worse by my being in my 20's (just a feeling, but I think it's close to the truth). I can understand that, to a degree, but it certainly has made me feel uncomfortable with quite a few people. A lack of trust in me and each other probably sums that up.

Of course, it does depend on the people you swing with. The ones I enjoy spending time and playing with aren't the ones who have any issues with my being 'in the lifestyle'. They don't look down on me for my involvement and they don't make any particular judgements. Whether there's a pattern or not, most of them have been quite a bit older than myself and in the mid 30's-40's.

I should add that when it comes to parties and clubs there's no way I'll be attending either without first knowing the people running them (and usually would only go with a couple). Also, not interested in any that let in unscreened single men and would even hesitate to visit one that had any single guys there.

Personally, I'd be interested to know what the attitude of couples on this board is to single females, especially those like myself who are in the younger age bracket.

[Karmickiss]

This is the first time I had the chance to come back to the site, and I was surprised and happy to see a response to that post I spontaneously left! Thank you for the kind words and encouragement, it came at the perfect time (again cementing my belief in a divine type of timing for everything). I've recently had a mini vacation from being a single mom, while my two boys visit their father, the boys are 10 and 12, and absolutely at brilliant ages, fun to be around, but I was grateful for some quiet time at least here at home.
I live in a rather small town, and yesterday took a trip into the closest city(Boston) by driving to the train station, and taking it in to the heart of the city. It was exquisite...having no schedule to keep, and watching and at times interacting with people. I found myself feeling free, and truly enjoyed all of the small things in the larger journey, and found that part of myself I thought got paralyzed or lost..the natural born flirt in me...lol. Even riding the train to various stops; and the type of flirtation I'm talking about is the most subtle kind, but it felt ininhibited and natural, and I could feel responses of similar kinds,and that also felt natural, instead of nerve-wracking(sp?).
Anyway,I was happy to come back here, and enjoying still some more quiet time, which is incredible...reading some quality books,and looks like it will be the perfect day to mow the lawn...

[biwhiteguy01]

[b]they Could Look At Me And Jack Off All They Want. I Might Want To See What They Have. But On The Otherhand If I Tell Someone No It Means No.
Also If The Private Room Door Is Closed Well It Should Have A Lock On It So No Can Enter Unless I Or We Want Them To.
Also If Someone Knocks On The Door It Could Mean They Are At Least Polite Enough To Knock. Instead Of Playing With The Door Handle. Also On The Otherhandi Guess It Would Kind Of Irratate Me For Some One To Knock On A Private Room Door. These Are Just My Opinions You Can Agree Or Disagree It's Your Opinion.

[Zedd]

.it was the stones that did good vibrations wasn't it?


NOPE, THE BEACH BOYS.

[Believe07]

Originally Posted by kycpl4bifem

They are walking bullseyes. Every once in a great while a single fem will come into the club we go to and is swarmed by every single guy, bi fem, and cpl in the place. On the internet swinger sites they get flooded with mail faster than anyone could be expected to read it. If we are ever going to get enough of them into the lifestyle to end this mad dash everytime one peeks in we are going to have to back off alittle and give them some room to breath. No one could expect to become comfortable in a new situation when they are put in the middle of a clasic fumble pile up on the 10 yard line. This is an adult lifestyle act like adults and give new people single or cpls some space and time to adjust. It's no wonder so many people report being scared to death on their first club visit when the regulars go into a feeding frenzy everytime new meat comes through the door. My 2 cents. What does everyone else think?

wow ...... I'm a brand new single female swinger .... trying to learn by reading your old archives here ... and WOW I connected with this post! I joined SLS two weeks ago and I've already had to make my profile inaccessible to everyone .. just so I can catch up on email! It has been more overwhelming than enjoyable I must admit. I haven't given up though .. I'm just .. .hiding for a little bit

I'm toying with the idea of going to a swing club alone ... the trouble is, I'm a bit shy when it comes to conversation ... so if its expected that the single woman be the aggressor, I might not have a good time??? I'd hate to miss out on meeting great people just cuz I'm shy .. but it's just how I am. Maybe I should stick to online websites like SLS......

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by Believe07

I'm toying with the idea of going to a swing club alone ... the trouble is, I'm a bit shy when it comes to conversation ... so if its expected that the single woman be the aggressor, I might not have a good time??? I'd hate to miss out on meeting great people just cuz I'm shy .. but it's just how I am. Maybe I should stick to online websites like SLS......

I don't think that the single woman is expected to be the aggressor. When people see that you're single and there alone, they are likely to be the aggressors (maybe more than you want).

What about making friends and visiting a club with 1-2 people? I think it's a lot easier your first time if you're going in there with somebody you know. Could be either a nice single, or a nice couple you're getting to know. Just a thought. Have fun!