Swingers not accepting of single males?

[playboy444]

I get a general feeling that Swiners are generally not too friendly towards single males. is this because of hubby fear and jealousy or because of feminist misandry?

[MRSfun]

Welcome to the Swingers Board Playboy. And the USA.

Have a look around in the forums. There may be some topics covered in the swinging single forums, that may explain answers to your question. If not,feel free to post your questions in a new thread. Thanks for leaving a link to your sls profile.

[JustAskJulie]

First off to the board playboy.

To answer your question, I think a lot of the issues people have with single males comes from single males thinking things like you just posted, unfortunately.

There are many couples who really enjoy single males, everyone is different and different couples are into different things. Some just aren't into singles, period. Some are. But for those that are they tend to look for singles who understand that they are inviting him in not because the husband can't satisy the wife but because they want to add something extra.

Thre is only a small percentage of single males males who find themselves successful in swinging and it all comes down to their attitude and mindset.

[graygo98]

Welcome to the Board. Boy, you can sure find about 1001 different answers to your question in the archives. Its a question that has come up time and again.

Here are a few of those 1001 answers:

1) Yes, the male is insecure, or
2) The female is looking to expand her bi side,or
3) The male is paranoid about expanding his!, or
4) They are into couples, or
5) Some single males don't understand the difference between "addition
and "replacement", or
6) Some single guys figure swinger fems are tramps, and approach them
that way, or
7) Some single males figure that five or so dick pics are "talk" enough,

A lot of couples though are really into MFM and MMF or cuckholding. If you want to succeed with them you need to figure out what they are looking for in a single male.... and what they will run the other way from.

[tribbles]

Hi playboy.

Mostly it's cuz there are just too darn many too choose from. Even for couples who like single guys as an addition to the fun, it's worse than a candy store. Plus you can't eat just candy so sometimes you have to have more of a full course meal (a couple or two).

Imagine if you found a web site with 1000 ladies willing to do you (yeah, everyone dream on ) .....and every day another 250 ladies were added. Even the most ambitious guy couldn't fuck 'em all...so most guys would get very picky with so many to choose from and many ladies would be bummed cuz they either never or almost never got picked. Oh and don't forget you might talk to one and like her and then she flakes out and won't meet....after a few of those you would be a bit jaded and impatient with any who even gave a hint of not being real.....

See how tough the competition is for single guys?

[good times]

For us at least, it is neither of the things you mention, we like to play with couples and have absolutely no desire to play with singles, male or female.

While we usually are not unfriendly to single males, neither do we go out of our way to be friendly to them. The reason for that is very simple, while not always the case, more often than not, if you are friendly to single males at a club, they automatically assume the wife wants to have sex with them, and they follow you around all night like a lost dog. Since neither she nor I are interested in that, we tend to ignore single males, thus avoiding having to deal with them at all. Even at that, sometimes a single guy will follow us around anyway. At that point I usually have to tell them outright that we aren't interested in him and suggest he move along. An outside observer may see this and think we are being unfriendly to the single guy. But the fact is we didn't go to the club looking to hook up with single guys in the first place, so if one insists on following us around uninvited, their isn't anything else we can do.

[lustylearning]

Like the Goodtimes, we have never sought a single male because we are not looking for one. We enjoy playing with couples, and what threesomes we've had have been within those couples during our playtime with them. So in our case it's not anti-single male, it's just not our thing.

As for group settings, we socialize within a group that seeks the same things we seek, so single males pose odd numbers and unwanted pressures. Luckily our club does not allow single males alone. Single males can come with single female partners, but it's still all about the numbers...

[NumbskullsX2]

Originally Posted by playboy444

I get a general feeling that Swiners are generally not too friendly towards single males. is this because of hubby fear and jealousy or because of feminist misandry?

Neither. It's because you don't have a partner.

My wife likes to have sex with men, so a single male would work fine for her.

Unfortunately, I like to have sex with women, so a single male won't work for me.

We do this together, so I guess that technically, we could each find our own single. But why do that, when there are so many couples available?

There's nothing inheritantly wrong with being a single male. I just don't want to fuck one, that's all.

Hope that clears it up for you.

[LFM2]

Hi Playboy! We're thrilled to have you here!

Well, we love our single male. Yes, we only have one.
Why? Here are some reasons: He's the only one that is respectful enough to pass muster. We love our single male because he talks to both of us, not just me. He's not married trying to cheat on his wife. He often hosts us at his home which is great since we still have one son at home. We've had way too many men contact us who are still married and just want a little play on the side. We don't play with anyone cheating on their spouse. It gives my husband and chance to take a break and just watch us. Our single is very accommodating.

[screaminggood]

Welcome to the Board. I adore single men, and I don't just keep one in the stable. But I don't find them on SLS or other sites; I select in person at my favorite clubs. I know it's a difficult for some of you...some clubs have such strict rules that I think you're chained to the chairs, but if you overcome it, that's where I hunt.

[theboy]

We're just starting to play with some singles, and to be honest, the number one thing that you can do to ensure that you never play with us is to be disrespectful. Very few pass muster of being respectful, attractive to the lady, and available to play.

Single ladies, on the other hand, we don't seem to have the respectful problem with. The problems we've had with single ladies are attachment issues.

[JDApopka]

We perfer single males but it seems hard to find the right one

[iapr]

The reason people are not friendly towards single males is due to the actions of the single males and not due to insecurity or misandry on the part of the couples. If people aren't having sex with you it is due to your actions or inactions and not due to other peoples dysfunctions.

[absingleman]

Sex is about timing. If you are respectful, intelligent, funny, open minded, and attractive, you still have to contact the right people at the right time FOR THEM or you will seem like the biggest jerk in the world no matter what you say. That is a lot harder online than in person because you can't judge someone's first impression to you if you are not there face to face. If you are a single man looking to swing with a couple, the only ways to meet face to face is to either devote your time you would spend looking for a single woman to traveling hundreds of miles to a swing club that will let you attend or hope you sent a correctly worded email to that couple that says they are interested in a single man and hope they are willing to write you back before you find a single woman interested in spending some time with you for the next three or four weeks.

For the couples looking for single men and discouraged by the jerks that contact them: I've said it before many times, but (quality) single men usually find three or four single women each week willing to talk to them online and seven or eight in real life in the time you would decide to respond to a particular single man who contacts you online first. If you are really serious about meeting single men, you couples need to actively browse their ads and write to them. If they are like me, they are turning down more single women each week for red flags in their ads than they are being turned down by couples.

It is about numbers. There are a lot of single men online looking to swing. But there are more single women in real life looking for a single man for a day, a week, a month, or for life. Against THAT competition, couples have to offer a single man something more than he can get at the grocery store or poetry section of the local library to keep the quality men interested in keeping in contact. Any man who is relying on swinging to meet people (and you can spot them) isn't worth swinging with. The ones who are usually won't be looking for you (couples) that often.

[jnbsmokin]

We have had three 3-somes with single males and were highly disappointed each time for multiple reasons, to the point that we don't have anything to do with single males unless it is for a specific fantasy, such as a gang-bang (which we are planning) or a simple 3-some ( these are normally improve and planned at the last second). One of the males actually tried to buy the wife!!! As if she were a hooker, and could be bought to play with w/o me there! That was disgusing to us both, b-t-w, never do that!!!!