Is SLS a good site for single males?

[Tia Vampire]

Rocy,sorry you feel like your getting alot of negative feed back but,I feel alot like t n t, i don't care if your single or a couple because we are all looking for some kind of exitement. One thing i do have to point out is that when you get single guys in the clubs, you don't know if they are there to cheat on thier wives or if they are just there for the pussy. The women there are not whores, but there to fulfill a fantacy and i think that some single guys forget that. it take alot of thought and love to let your girlfriend or wife lay down with another man and enjoy it. At first i did'nt want to see my fiance fuck another woman and watch her enjoy my man the way that i do. After seeing it, it turned me on because i felt the power my man had in his dick to knock a bitch off of her feet.( sorry ladies, i should not refer to ladies as bitches),but you know what i mean.If i could go back about 18 years, i would be a single female swinger too.

[Dooode]

Originally Posted by Tia Vampire

One thing i do have to point out is that when you get single guys in the clubs, you don't know if they are there to cheat on thier wives or if they are just there for the pussy. The women there are not whores, but there to fulfill a fantacy and i think that some single guys forget that.

True. So true. Single men stalk swinger clubs like a lot of vultures waiting for a victim to fall. The common term is "towel shark".

I NEVER go to a club as a single. I would just hate it. I always bring a date, either a single lady or a couple as my date. Some clubs require that another couple vouch for the single. That way the couple is held accountable for the single should he step out of line.

There are two problems with singles at clubs, other than "towel sharks", as I mentioned above:

The first being is that it is outrageously overpriced for single men, and the second being that BECAUSE it is overpriced for single men, they don't have the patience to create relationships with couples who attend. A weekly attendance can easily rack up a monthly bill of several hundred dollars! So the pressure ends up being to MAKE something happen else it becomes a waste of money.

Of course it's the wrong viewpoint. But I can see how the viewpoint can exist nevertheless.

[Tia Vampire]

Like the new avatar dooode, I thought that would make Rocky feel better and see why we feel about singles the way that we do. Nothing against singles, but they should be more respectful.

[Kycouple4fun]

We had a profile up on SLS a while back, and many of the single guys there were just plain rude and disrepectfull. I think that this is the problem. That a vocal minority (IMO) has ruined it for alot of decent men out there. In all honesty I think they come into the idea with "Gurl is some slut who aint getting it from her guy and I can gives it if I lies about my cock."

Sorry couldn't resist devolved netspeak there.

But seriously we said in our profile we would like to experence an MFM and within a week we had 20 responces all similar to this: "I lik fuk U wit BIG DIK and make U cum much, ir me at *insert im address* R u hot?"

I mean its no wonder so many couples get a negitive vibe from single males right off the bat. Thankfully we haven't yet (and are working on our SLS profile to reflect that) but there are plenty of Dumb males who act this way that ruin it for thoughtfull guys. I think this is why the barriers keep mounting for single guys myself.

Just some thoughts really, hope I didn't offend.

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by Chicup

No, he can be considered a good toy.

I'd like to have Tony Stewart as a toy lol

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by Kycouple4fun

We had a profile up on SLS a while back, and many of the single guys there were just plain rude and disrepectfull. I think that this is the problem. That a vocal minority (IMO) has ruined it for alot of decent men out there. In all honesty I think they come into the idea with "Gurl is some slut who aint getting it from her guy and I can gives it if I lies about my cock."
But seriously we said in our profile we would like to experence an MFM and within a week we had 20 responces all similar to this: "I lik fuk U wit BIG DIK and make U cum much, ir me at *insert im address* R u hot?"

I know! They seem to think that we are unpaid prostitutes I think. I was talking to a single man a while back, and he actually had my attention. I was honestly kind of wondering why a man as good looking as he is was trying to pick up swinging women though, he can go to any bar and pick up a woman. Anyways, like I said, he definately had my attention. So, he emails me 2 pics of himself. And they are pics of his penis, which annoyed me from jump. Okay single gents, let me give you a hint: We women KNOW you have a penis! I have given birth to 2 males, I know that men have a penis! I don't need to see a pic of you rubbing it lol. So, no facial pics, and the ones I had seen were dark. What sealed the deal though was what he wrote next to the pics. We had been talking for a while, and he was very polite albeit kind of aggressive. So, he sends me the pics and writes "how would you like to suck this cock?" that was it for me lol.

[nice_cpl_n_bama]

I just deleted our profile on adult friend finder because of the single male issue. This weeks messages, all from single males dispite the profile saying "no single males" included one fine upstanding fellow who wrote that he wanted to "fuck her till she can't walk" and graciously allowed that "If you really want your husband can watch."
TROLLS, NOTHING BUT TROLLS!

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by nice_cpl_n_bama

I just deleted our profile on adult friend finder because of the single male issue. This weeks messages, all from single males dispite the profile saying "no single males" included one fine upstanding fellow who wrote that he wanted to "fuck her till she can't walk" and graciously allowed that "If you really want your husband can watch."
TROLLS, NOTHING BUT TROLLS!

Yeah, thats uncalled for. SLS has the ability to block single males, which is what we choose to do at this time...not that I have anything against single men. Heck, I married a single man! But they are an annoyance in regards to our swinging life.

[Dooode]

Originally Posted by ShellyM

Yeah, thats uncalled for. SLS has the ability to block single males, which is what we choose to do at this time...

Absolutely. Blocking single males would definately cut a lot of noise from the email traffic. I can't blame most couples for doing so. I've been on SLS for a couple of years, SDC before that for 4 years. I KNOW the aggravation most couples have to go through.

Personally, I don't write people. I wait for them to write me.

I create a complete profile that says damn-near everything that I am about. It's not some 2 or 3 lines of "I love sex" or some nonsense like that. It actually lists all that I enjoy, what my basic rules are, what my fantasies are, who I am as an individual, what kind of people I'd like to meet.

JUST BY SITTING THERE AND DOING NOTHING, people will write. I receive emails just to compliment me on my profile, but people also write because they are intrigued. Many become contacts that lead to dates.

Listen guys: You want to attract a couple? You want to make friends in the Lifestyle? Don't present yourself as some raunchy dickhead who's only out to get his wick wet. Present yourself as an interesting, fun and sane person and others will draw themselves to you.

[Amanda69]

Dooode you write well and present as having a good head on your shoulders. I like your thoughts on singles in the lifestyle and sincerely hope that men reading the post take the advice to heart.

Respect breeds respect. There is no reason to treat people in the lifestyle any differently than you would your mother when it comes to basic respect and manners when first contacting.

I guess there are people out there who whether in email, posts or in person will simply never get why others do not respond positively to their advances. Maybe they just watch too much bad porn and believe all the stereotypes.

[slowluvr65]

Originally Posted by TNT

It all comes down to an individual/personal attitude/mindset and it has nothing to do with whether your single or in a committed relationship at all, in our opinion.

Thank you. Finally it was expressed in a nice package. This is the positive attitude I wish people would adopt.

I hate to reduce it to "rap" slang but it seems to fit. For all the open and accepting types of people swingers proclaim to be, there is too much hating going on. Worse yet, it is hating based on categories or specifically marital status.

All this crap about the folks who do not want swingles to use the word "swinger" to describe themselves is really that you do not want us in your "lifestyle" or most particularly in your meetings and clubs. And that exclusion is entirely based on our status. Simply put, if you don't want to play with me, don't. I don't want to bother you either, and I won't. I do wish for the opportunity to meet a couple, a female, a group who DOES want to play with me.

There may be other single males who have offended you. Excess Testosterone will get you disqualified from the Tour de France and will take away your World Record, but utimately it won't make you popular. Test my A and B samples, if I'm an asshole then I deserve to be criticized for something I have done. Until I have done something offensive, don't include me in that wide brush.

[Dooode]

That was sweet, Amanda! Thank you. *kisses*

[RaysWays]

Dooode, how many of your contacts come to you because you are a bi-m? Those aren't too common, so you aren't just another single male.

[Amanda69]

For all the open and accepting types of people swingers proclaim to be, there is too much hating going on.

Hating, hating? Who hates who (or is that whom?) Just because couples (aka swingers) choose not to play with single males and in their opinion do not call them swingers doesn't make them people who hate.

As a single you can call yourself what you want just realize that there are many swingers who will not play with you and who don't consider you a swinger.

Having been a single in the lifestyle for many years myself I am not sure why there is even a push by singles to have this label? Is it because you want to legitimize having sex with multiple partners? Do you want to be part of a percieved "cool group"? Hey I was just happy I found an even wider variety of sexual partners as a single.

I was introduced to swinging as something that is done as a couple. Something that the "couple" has decided to add to their "relationship" to enhance it. I still believe that is what it is all about.

Adding a toy (single/swingle) can be a fun addition if that is what the "couple" wish to do. Part of being a single in this lifestyle is accepting that you are not always wanted or required....we are superfulous to the requirements....but when they are looking for a toy we are pulled out of the drawer to enjoy...

[Alura]

Bravo, Amanda!

The opposite of love is not hate; it's indifference.

Mr. Alura