Can I Ever find True love with a woman who enjoys this lifestyle?

[EternallySingle]

Yes, I'm back...for now.

I think you all misunderstood King David's actual question. Probably because most of you were in a committed relationship FIRST then started swinging. Then again, I've asked it before just to get comments. These are his main confusions, because they are mine too. I deal with them, and I'll tell you how later.

Most single women who are actively swinging tend to state that the last thing they want is a committed relationship with ANY single man. Whether it is true, or they are just saying that to discourage single men, that is their choice.

They tend to avoid contact with single men who are involved with swinging for reasons that only another woman can fully appreciate or understand. Again, nothing wrong with that, just something single men have to accept.

Single women swing for reasons that are alien to most single men. Sex is a part of it, but there is something about why women choses to swing that eliminates most single men before they even get a chance to see if things could work out. Don't even try to talk to her to find out why. You might become a conversation friend, and you know what happens with single men and single women who are conversation friends? (hint: its not sex)

Its hard enough for a single man to have an intimate emotional and sexual relationship with a single woman. SHE does not have to prove she will be faithful, because there are any number of men that will come over when she calls in the middle of the night. For most men, a woman being faithful is more about her not wanting anyother man, not winning him over. Men don't have that option. So, if a single man swings, guess what that single woman (that also swings) is thinking about how faithful he will be to her? [A single NON-SWINGING friend of mind said she could never be in a relationship with a man that was sleeping with someone else. But she slept with four different men that week and wondered why none of them would make a commitment after she had been with them for six months]

Finding anyone who is totally compatible is hard. The more stipulations you throw into the mix, the harder it becomes.

The problem I, King David, and probably most single men that have started looking for a relationship is whether or not to continue trying to swing. Women (I don't mean to sound sexist but its true) don't have to WORK as hard at finding sex partners as men do. With only a few situational exceptions, women only have to become better at seperating the good guys (and gals) from the bad ones. Men have to do that AND find someone that is willing to be with them AND convince them that they are not just flirting AND reassure them that they are not going to hurt them physically or emotionally AND not look like they are begging. A lot more work. I would say either swing or find a girlfriend, but don't try to do both. The few couples who met and got together while they were swinging as singles are very few. When a single swinger meets someone, starts a relationship, and brings the partner into swinging, it is usually the woman, not the man.

Lastly, "nympho" died in the 1990s. Something about Monica Lewinsky, Jennifer Flowers, and a blue dress. Nobody wanted that word associated with them after they saw those two and what they had to say about the sexual escapades in the White House. I know a former White House aid. He said the female staffers where way more outlandish and forward than the men.

[Estaque]

You don't go to a couple's dating website to find "true love". Try Match.com or Adult Friend Finder.