sociology in the bedroom

[LevKamensky]

In your past MFM sessions the single man was usually

[BradAndJanet]

I can't vote. One was a jerk and the other a gentleman. So far we're batting .500, but I'll let you know in a few months after we get back to the club again.

-B

[ALilOEverything]

I've only had MFM's with guys I know very well. The first was with my first husband and his best friend. The second was with my new boyfriend and my ex-husband. Both were great experiences and both very respectful. I haven't had an MFM in 10 years and more and more I wish I could But I just don't know meeting guys online would be as gratifying.

[TNT]

Every MFM threesome we have ever had was a good experience. Some better sexually than others, but all good in their own way.


Teresa

[Spoomonkey]

I had to vote for the negative. I think we have had a bad run of luck, honestly. We have really only had one guy who was a great guy, good at what he did in the bedroom and then was respectful of us as a couple afterwards. That one guy was not someone we met on an ad site or in a club... Go figure...

I wonder if there would be some interesting "poll fodder" in that - "which guys are more likely to be great guys: a) guys you met at a club. b) guys you met on an ad site. c) guys with whom you had an established friendship with prior to playing."

My guess is, guys who obviously have a respect for you and your relationship are going to be a great experience. Our one good experience was with someone like that. The others - about half were simply no good in the bedroom and the other half (varying from marginally good to very, very good) thought that moving in on Mrs Spoomonkey would be appreciated...

Spoomonkey

[TNT]

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

I wonder if there would be some interesting "poll fodder" in that - "which guys are more likely to be great guys: a) guys you met at a club. b) guys you met on an ad site. c) guys with whom you had an established friendship with prior to playing."

Ok..I'll bite on this one

Thinking back over all the men we have had threesomes with the ones that we knew a long time (years) prior to playing ...the playtime was much more relaxed, we joked around more, the conversation flowed more easily and it was just loads of fun.

The ones we have met at clubs/socials are second in being a more relaxed playtime. We were able to get to know the men in a more social setting, got to watch how they interacted with other people, and developed a friendship with before eventually playing.

The ones we met through ad sites and only met for the purpose of playing were fun but there just wasn't that much of a personal connection, it was more bascially just sex.

Now as far as the actual sex itself being good....that's about split even between all three categories.

Like I said before, they have all been good experiences and all the men were extremely nice and respectful of Ted and I...the sex was just better with some of them than it was with others.

Intersting thoughts you've given me Spoo.


Teresa

[evulkitty]

We can't vote at all on this one, not because we haven't had any MFM, but because the ones we did have were with people we have known a long time and they really don't fit in either of the two categories. They started out as good friends, long time friends even, and I honestly believe intended to be respectful in the beginning, but (I get to relate to Mrspoomonkey here) in the end eventually would have preferred to boot me out of the picture altogether and run off by themselves . . . for good.

Fortunately, J and I's relationship is above and beyond that so it didn't happen, the problem lie completely with them and they have to deal with it (and ain't gettin' any at all anymore as a result, so I guess it sucks to be them lol )

Our rule as a result of that has now become that in the future, the extra guy is NOT going to be someone who has been a longtime friend, and will be there PURELY for the MFM experience and the enjoyment of the sex. Of course, he still has to be a decent individual and not a jackass, he just has to be able to chalk it up to fun, maybe get to do it again sometime, but be able to move on. IOW, "Thanks for your participation, had a great time, now go home."

Harsh maybe, but how its gotta be.

Same applies for FMF, but since finding that is almost like hitting the lottery, (odds seem better with the lottery, I think) we don't sweat that one too much.

Probably why we're focusing on meeting couples for the time being . . . everybody's got their own to go home to that way.

[Sweet_Candy]

Originally Posted by evulkitty

Probably why we're focusing on meeting couples for the time being . . . everybody's got their own to go home to that way.

Our sentiments exactly. we're torn between making friends to have sex or having sex without friendship.

Sweet

[xxoticangel]

a) guys you met at a club

In our expierences guys we have met at swingers clubs have been about 50% jerk and 50% nice guy. A nice guy doesn't always lead to great sex though. However, we have had great sex with a jerk before we knew he was a jerk (just add alcohol).

b) guys you met on an ad site

75% jerk. Most don't show. The ones that have were awesome expierenced.

c) guys with whom you had an established friendship with prior to playing

Good conversation, so-so sex. By the time friendship has developed most guys have such a respect for our relationship that they are intimidated and either don't want to go through with it or can't perform when the action starts.

[EvilMJ]

While I haven't invited any guys for A MFM..yet....there are three so far that I have met at the club...one was creepy....the other two were prefectly nice normal guys.

[Chicup]

We have only MFMed with the M's of couples we have been with prior (and with permision of course) so jerks haven't been an issue.

Since this wouldn't qualify as a 'single man' I didn't vote in the poll.