Does Swinging Always feel like this?

[2cute2care]

no wildflower, u made perfect sense! i understand what ur saying completly..the other guy did know that we used to be swingers yes, so he just assumed i think more or less that it would be ok, thats why he came to us cuase they had never done anything with another couple and thought it would be more comfortable to do something with us--and i dont mind that it happened, im over all of it now at first i was just like WAIT HOLD UP, we said we werent gonna swing anymore and we didnt agree on it before they came, so i just felt soo left out..

[SluttyWife]

I don't like the score system you two are already keeping. Not a good way to begin swinging at all. This is supposed to be a "couple activity" right? You should never allow yourself to be persuaded to do something you do not want to do. Especially a game of tit for tat.

<shaking head>

;-*

[BradAndJanet]

Originally posted by SluttyWife
... Especially a game of tit for tat.
...

Or tit for tit, whatever the case (sorry, couldn't resist )

We agree, swinging should not be a competition about who 'gets' the most.

2cute, I encourage you to keep talking with your husband about this. Best to ya!

-B

[Liquidplay]

well its been a little bit since you responded. How are things going now?

[2cute2care]

-to be honest i dont know, i hate to say great and turn around two days from now and have another breakdown lol..were talking more but i still think were a long way from where we need to be ---thanks for asking though c(:

[Liquidplay]

Well, do you even know what you want. I have read this entire post and kept quiet until now. The one thing I have seen a definite is that you seem to be unsure about yourself, as well as what your doing. You have to know and be solid about yourself before really getting into things.

[2cute2care]

well not to be rude but i think thats why i said WE STOPED SWINGING!!! IM NOT THE ONE WHO SAID HEY LETS GET BACK INTO it, had u of read my posts like everyone else on here since day one u would have read that part. why do u think i came looking for advice in the first place? i know exactly what i want, but im with someone who auto changes how things are thats why i started posting on here, please if ur gonna comment read my whole post cuase i dont think u understand at all.

[De and Ci]

2cute

Boy are you getting snippy? Liquid didn't say anything wrong! Just trying to give you his 2 cents. I suspect you guys have a lot more issues than just swinging. It sounds like ya'll were pursuing the swinging thing too eagerly. He was getting frustrated cause he didn't like any of the women who were willing, thought he wasn't ever going to find any. So it was easy for him to agree to stop. This couple drops by, the woman is willing and he finds her attractive. He changes his mind, and desperately wants you forgot about the whole "stop swinging" thing. You say yourself the guy was good and you had a decent time and I'm sure your hubby noticed you had some fun. He has a big letdown when you later tell him the whole thing was uncool. He probably hoped you had changed your mind. Anyway, I hope you get your relationship issues resolved. If you guys decide to swing again, take it easy and make sure beforehand you are in agreement about both halves of the couple

[Alura]

You can't change what happened. Were you harmed in any way? At worst, you seem to have had a decent experience. Would you want to play with the couple again?

Mr. Alura

[Liquidplay]

now see, there is a problem 2cute, you jumped to conclusions about the time period i was talking about. See. I was talking about now, and it seems you think I was talking about this whole time. Like you said you had a good time. You said that now you have talked, so maybe you are interested in getting back into the lifestyle, just a little more notice ahead of time would be appropriate. This also will prevent fights, because you dont just say, "Hey, he's hot, I wanna do him and I think I will do it tonight" and same for him. Now you can say "Hey, I think he's hot, I wouldn't mind.....or I would like to..." then that leads into the needed discussion that would prevent fights.

[2cute2care]

OK liquid, well then i was wrong -ill give u that im sorry..i cant honestly say what will ever happen again alura-cause right now i dont know..in some ways i think it would be cool cause they are a attractive couple but in the other sense, they are friends and i know if we continue to swing with them or something happens that any of the four of us finds uncool then we may very well lose a friendship over it, so right now i dont know if i ever do wish for something like that to happen again. but i agree IF anything was ever to happen again it would have to be talked out way before hand-

[ChloeandHubby]

Hi there cute, I have read all the posts from the first message and my heart really goes out to you. Swinging takes a relationship to another level and not setting paramters to you and your partners pleasure can be detrimental. It should never ever be used as a "scorecard" of you got 2 "f**ks" and I did not even get any etc etc..If resentment has crept in either take a good hard look at swinging and what you both want out of it or call it a day (and really mean it), thereafter talk, talk and talk some more....remember he/she is the most special person in your life and nothing or nobody should ever jeopardise that. good luck, Chloe.