My husband and I are new to this- we had one experience with a second guy about a year ago that went quite well, but neither of us have been with another couple, either in this relationship or previous ones. We are very interested in this idea though, and have met some people online that are possiblities. The problem I am running up against is in his choice of the female side of the couple. I certainly am not trying to enforce that he be with someone he doesn't find attractive, but personally I am uncomfortable with him being with someone that I perceive as much more attractive than myself. With the one couple that he is trying to initiate something with, the female is much younger than me, has a much larger chest (something I have always been paranoid about), and is overall more attractive than I am. Is this weird for me to want him to be with someone a little less threatening? He thnks that I am being impossibly insecure- I disagree and think this is a normal response, especially to a new idea. Maybe once I had tried this before and knew a little bit more about how it would go, I would have an easier time letting him pick the women, but to start out with, I would like him to be a little more considerate adn let me start with a situatin I don't feel threatened by. I guess what I would like to hear from some of you is if you ever felt this way or have any rules set in place that allows each part of the couple to approve every additional person. Is this a normal response, and if not, should I just try to get over it or does this mean that I am not meant for this type of lifestyle? This is a funny situation to me because when we were jsut starting out, he was quite jelous of anyone I said two words to, and now he claims that this will not bother him at all as long as we are both in it together.