Party Crashers

[BoogieKnight]

My wife and I hit a very crowded club this weekend after driving to a major city from out of state. The club was hopping, with nearly 80+ couples out in the main area hooking up. My wife and I chatted up 2 other couples for a period of about 1 or 2 hours where we had a nice conversation, did some dancing on the dance floor, and then discussed exactly what our preferences and boundaries were. Rules I guess were typical, but it all worked out between us:

Couple 1 - The guy was only interested in his own wife, it was her first time, her idea and she wanted to do something. She was also quite shy however.

Couple 2 - Wife was bi-curious, and heavily pimping her husband. He was along for the ride with a big smile on his face.

Couple 3 (us) - Just in it for the voyeurism/exhibitionism. Wife did have some bi-curious moments.

All was just fine and settled, everyone had their roles and we set off upstairs to get it on finally. However, as we climbed up into a little bedroom loft in the club, another random couple out of the blue just interjected themselves and climbed up with us.

The female of the couple got naked and got into participating with the other two girls, pushing far more than they had already said they were comfortable with, prompting one girl to say "Who the fuck are you?" finally. Everyone assumed they had already been invited by someone else. The guy of the couple kept fondling my wife's ass from behind while we were getting it on, and blocking our view of the show to which we were expecting. It took 3 "no's" from her and finally a "get your hands off" from me before he stopped trying for us, and instead he started putting his hands all over the other girls going at it.

By this point I had absolutely no ability to get or stay hard, these party crashers were really harshing the buzz. After the other two wives made it clear they weren't welcome, the guy basically ordered his girl to go suck my cock, of which I had to tell her that it was already booked (my wife was attempting to ride Mr. Softy to get him rolling, to no avail though god bless her).

They finally climbed out of our loft, at which point my own vigor magically came back, and we ended up having a great time in the end with everyone getting what they wanted. But man, WTF?

Has anyone else had a similar party crasher experience? What do you do if you aren't really sure if they should be there? The other two couples with us didn't mind at first, and we were 15 minutes in before the problems started. Is this sort of thing common in clubs? And which is better, just clubs or making regular playdates with just a few couples, we discussed and saw advantages for each, though we are pretty boring for most people.

[VegasLee]

There are some people, many people that use on common sense in Life or this Lifestyle.

As soon as the other couple invited their self into "your" party someone should have just told them, sorry, private party. Put the end to it before it starts.

This is an adult lifestyle and people need to be treated that way, letting them know up front if they are not invited when they crash your party.

Keep it simple and have much more fun that way. No use waiting for the drama to start to put an end to things.

[LagniappeDC]

Wow, that stinks! We've learned that group situations at lifestyle clubs and resorts have to be handled with great care. It sounds like you did all the pre-negotiations exactly right. For a group to really work, especially when its people who are new to each other, it's important that everyone is comfortable with everyone else's rules and boundaries.

Where it can get difficult is when, during that planning stage, others get wind of what is happening and want to get in on the action. That's when it gets difficult because the more you add, the more variables come up. It's important to be clear to those who are interested that your group wants to stay small for the comfort of everyone else.

And, with what you experienced, some couples see a group as an open invitation to join in. As VegasLee advised, you have to really close them down. If you don't recognize a couple, then ask who they are and who invited them. Let them know its a private party and ask them to leave. If they don't, then talk to the other couples about stopping play and moving to a more private guarded area or speak to management.

We absolutely love the vibe of a good group, but it can present its own challenges. Sorry to hear this one didn't go well, but hopefully you'll try again!!

[Chicup]

This is why you go to clubs with doors you can shut/lock.

We had a couple try that once, ah the joy of locking doors.

[ViSexual]

That sort of attitude about swinging reminds me of the jerks in high school.

You know, the ones who'd hear that a girl had sex with some guy and then assume she'd have sex with him too!

I always hated that!

If people aren't polite and considerate then they should be asked to leave! Just like, no means no, no invitation means no too!

[padoc]

We were at Trapeze one night with a couple we were very good friends with. We four went into one of the small private rooms and I began to go down on his wife as he was doing the same for mine. We had shut the door but had neglected to lock it.

Neither guy could see anything, having our faces buried and apparently both girls had their eyes closed. In a short while, I felt a distinctly feminine pair of hands on my erection and I discovered later that at the same time, my wife was getting her nipple forcefully pulled.

Our male friend noticed that my wife suddenly seemed distracted and when he looked up, he saw a large erection near his face with it's attached male body leaning over my wife. Our friend is not shy and he knew that we had not invited another couple in with us. I heard him say, "I always wanted to try this" and then I hears a distinct "whack" as he reached out and firmly bitch slapped the strange dick in his face. The guy howled which definitely got my attention.

I disengaged from my partner and removed the hand of a decidedly unattractive female from my dick. Her husband was seriously pissed at our friend and at his deflated and possibly bruised dick. Fortunately, he was sober enough to recognize that he was outnumbered and he and his wife left when both were pointedly told that they had not been invited and were not welcome.

This is a true and un-embelished story that really could have gone badly. Im not suggesting that dick slapping is a good way to handle a pushy, uninvited party crasher, but in this case at least, it worked well!

[HappyCpl]

There is a couple at a club we sometimes frequent that are notorious for this kind of behavior. They camp out in the group room all night long, so much so that there is now a sign on the door to the group room stating that this type of behavior isn't tolerated. They still do it, however, and are a major irritant to me and a lot of other attendees. I think they are "lifetime" members of the club, so they pretty much do what they want, which seems to be focused on bothering me and Mrs. H.(I don't think they are singling us out, they just bug everyone)

What bothers me about them is that they seem totally incapable of "getting the hint" that they aren't welcome. It's not just a lack of physical attraction that makes them so irritating, it's the reek of desperation they both carry around. They like to camp out just beyond the curtains and stare, while the guy mutters stuff about how "She's a squirter..... she's ready..... check her out!!"


I finally had had enough of them the last time we were there. Mrs. H and I were playing with another couple and having a VERY hot time, when they parked themselves about 8 inches from my head on the other side of the curtain. Our women were 69'ing, with myself and the other guy on each end, and I had the other woman's feet in each hand, when suddenly I feel breathing on my neck, and turn to see the guy pushing his face past the curtain(thin as they are, almost sheer). I hissed "Get the fuck outta' here!!" loudly enough that everyone in the room must have heard me. He grabs his woman and they slithered away, but I have no doubt they were back there later....



However, Mrs. H and I had an amazing experience in another group room that was very spur-of-the-moment. We were sitting next to 3 couples who were partying together, and Mrs. H and I were chatting it up with the group. At some point they all decided to go upstairs to the big rooms, whereupon I blurted out, "Can we come, too?"... 6 sets of eyeballs looked us up and down, and 6 sets of smiling teeth and "of course" were the reply. We'd just met all of them that night, though we'd seen them around at the club before. We avoided one room due to the "campers", but found another one, which led to a very memorable experience that night!

[JustAskJulie]

I have to say that your experience turned out pretty positively compared to what could have happened.

Given that so many people were involved I can understand how there might have been some initial layers of one couple thinking another had invited this 5th couple.

I can't say I've been in exactly this situation. The closest I can recall was a group play with a friend (female) and a BUNCH of guys. We hand-picked the guy and still another thought he could just join. I let him know he wasn't welcome and we stationed one of the guys who wasn't occupied at the door to act as a bouncer.