Is the difference in males & females desire for multiple partners instinctive?

[OhioCouple]

CABob, I think specialness must come from within. Think, therefore you are. I don't think it boils down to appearance, attitude, style, grace or sense of humor. What it does boil down to is confidence. Confidence and pride in yourself.

My husband and I are as different as daylight and dark. We aren't anything special (by your defentions) but we are special to ourselves, each other, our families and most of the people we have grown to know. Therefore we are *special*.

[Flori_DAMAN]

Anyone that promotes no evil and is a good person is special.

John

[CABob]

Humm interesting...but wasn't there certain qualities about both of you that attracted you to each other in the first place? And isn't it those "special" qualities that make you "special" towards each other? There must have been a certain chemistry that brought you two together. When someone says "I don't know what it is about that person, but I'm attracted to him or her." Aren't they talking about their "specialness"? It's the unique qualities about them that no one else seems to posses in just that particular way, right?

[Flori_DAMAN]

Chemistry to me is the key word.

IF it aint there it aint.

Me

[Roxysbayou]

It's what you see in someone or what they see in you. It coul dbe your sense of humor, your kindness, whatever. We all have special qualities about us. you just have to look a little deeper.

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by CABob
Humm interesting...but wasn't there certain qualities about both of you that attracted you to each other in the first place? And isn't it those "special" qualities that make you "special" towards each other? There must have been a certain chemistry that brought you two together. When someone says "I don't know what it is about that person, but I'm attracted to him or her." Aren't they talking about their "specialness"? It's the unique qualities about them that no one else seems to posses in just that particular way, right?

Actually there wasn't anything in particular other than we had shared some conversation, almost always dealing with work relations. We had been acquaintences for several years prior to our first actual date. He was physically nothing that I looked for in a man for sex (I definitely was not seeking an LTR at that time). And I was, in his eyes too young for him.

I think our major attraction lied in the fact that he liked my spark and sassiness and I liked the fact that he had a life outside of work. We truly have nothing in common when it comes to outside of the bedroom, other than an enormous amount of love and respect for each other. It is very hard to explain and you'll know it when you experience it.

So for us, our respect and love for each other is what has made us special to the other. As much as I love him, I'm not going to bait a hook or load a shotgun......he's on his own there and not allowed to tell me about it! LOL

[Roxysbayou]

I agree Lori, mutual respect has a lot to do with it. Understanding someone, even if you don't agree.

[CABob]

Originally posted by OhioCouple
I think our major attraction lied in the fact that he liked my spark and sassiness

So isn't your spark and sassiness "special" qualities about you that he admired?

I think so Mrs. OhioCouple.

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by CABob
So isn't your spark and sassiness "special" qualities about you that he admired?

Actually most of my sassiness and sparks were fueled by my dislike on how certain projects that his company was doing were not coming along as quickly as promised. He didn't really like me a whole lot back then....but then again, maybe he did.

'Ms. O'

[LarrySmith]

Originally posted by OhioCouple
... was physically nothing that I looked for in a man for sex

Isn't this the ultimate paradox that we all run into?
There are pleanty of good ones out there for both sexes, but they are often not 'flashy' enough to get noticed. Listen to any radio shrink, and you'll hear over and over again the same theme. The caller is in a relationship with a 'looker' that doesn't treat them right (cheating, insults, emotional abuse), and it's the third identical relationship in a row. What got that caller's attention in the first place was all the wrong things.

So take a chance on that quiet one with funny glasses, not the one that makes you all hot & bothered, and you may be pleasantly surprised.

OK, time to get off my soapbox now, before I wear a groove in it.

[CABob]

Good suggestion Larry. You can't judge a book by it's cover and people are way more mysterious inside than a book.


And Ms, O'
You do have "special" qualities, whether you want to admit it or not.

[jen]

Good suggestion Larry. You can't judge a book by it's cover and people are way more mysterious inside than a book

Exactly, Shrek is a great example. So is Willy Wanka (Gene Wilder -- Wow)

[Bob123]

I never dwell on the fact that good girls are difficult and never compare them with men. There can be no comparison. Every man thinks he is the best thing that landed on the planet. Every guy thinks he can outfuck every other man. Every man thinks "if only they knew the real me" then they would love me.



This statement certianly does not reflect me or most of the men I know

[PaulKing]

"Maybe it just comes down to supply and demand? "

The solution is to have a FLUID economy where the PILLARS of industry are kept well lubricated and PUMPING the economic life blood of society thus circulating all available assets and ultimately STIMULATING the fountain of wealth to BURST forth.


I think that was what Marx was trying to say but was misunderstood.

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by LarrySmith

So take a chance on that quiet one with funny glasses, not the one that makes you all hot & bothered, and you may be pleasantly surprised.

This is so true, Larry. During my single years, I lusted after a particular body type, without thought to the person behind it. I found myself giving into that lust and placed myself in very unfavorable spots. Not all were like that but when I let my lust over rule my common sense...disaster loomed.

My husband is a very handsome man, with a great body, but he wasn't of the particular type that I lusted after. After a few dates and getting to know him, I found a whole new lust. One that was for the person itself. 10 years after the fact of our getting together....I still get the 'hots' for him and lust for him more than ever. You haven't lived until your own hubby says...."Not tonight Dear, I have a headache"!

You just never know what package that special someone could be in!

Ms. 'O'