What you find appealing is never going to be the same as everyone else. Should we all base our desires upon what is inside and not the outward individual? That is would be Shangri-La, now wouldn’t it?
I would never expect a person who possesses outer beauty to desire me. I would never ask a 21 year old woman to look beyond my years despite my sexual abilities or talents. I cannot accept who feel this way either and nor should you. If you truly feel that every person is beautiful, you are blessed and nature has painted a wondrous canvas for you. Unfortunately, not all of those in the lifestyle are as fortunate as you in their view. Most have pre-ordained images in our minds of what we will enjoy and find attractive.
How we view the lifestyle is entirely up to the individual. It means something different to each of us. We all live in a glass house of sorts. Even those with the most liberal of tastes do.