Meeting a couple for the first at a club

[curiousswingers]

So Tia's thread made me think of another question so instead of hijacking hers I thought I would post a new one. We are going to a club this weekend and have plans to meet up with a couple that we have not met before. Now what if we don't like them when we meet them, or if lets say we do like them and even play with them, do we have to stay with them all night? What if we meet some other people there that we would like to hang with? Is it rude to excuse ourselves from them? We have not been to a club yet so this is our first time, and we want to enjoy it and all it has to offer. thanks all

[Spoomonkey]

I'd give them a fair shake - give them a fair amount of time - but I'd also tell them up front that you and your SO want to take some time (once you get comfortable and brave) to explore the club. This gives you a built in excuse to move on if things aren't working.

And if they are working - just stay there and say something along the lines of "we thought we wanted to explore the club, but after meeting you, we'd really like to explore you guys."



But no - it isn't rude to excuse yourself if chemistry just isn't there.

Spoomonkey

[curiousswingers]

Excellant spoo! Thanks for the line

[Spoomonkey]

Excellant spoo! Thanks for the line

I just wish I were that smooth in real time. If it works, let me know

Spoomonkey

[JustAskJulie]

If it's a club where you know other people you can also use the "oh, look there's so and so we haven't seen them in ages, we need to go say hello" and then just 'forget' to come back.

However, be prepared that if they are into you (and you don't return it) that they may come looking for you later (regardless of the reason you use to get away) at which point you may be forced with having to tell them that you aren't into them.


If you are into them and you play (or don't) and just decide that you don't want to hang out with them all night. You can use any of these lines as well, but I would start the line off with "we've really enjoyed getting to know you and we hope we can do this again sometime. Here's our contact info, now we are going to go ........" Doing so pretty much states up front (in a nice way) that your time with them is over and you are moving on to something else.

[SouthBond]

If you go on a blind date and then dump them in the middle of the movie, you are a jerk. You have to pre-qualify the couple before you meet them. You need to ask questions, send pictures, get to know them. Establish common interests, besides screwing, to build an understanding of what type of characters that you are meeting.

[curiousswingers]

This is true however we hate the endless emails and chatting we feel that we can only really get to know someone by meeting face to face, that way also if it is just a single guy, or cheating guy we find out sooner rather than later.

[good times]

If you go on a blind date and then dump them in the middle of the movie, you are a jerk. You have to pre-qualify the couple before you meet them. You need to ask questions, send pictures, get to know them. Establish common interests, besides screwing, to build an understanding of what type of characters that you are meeting.

That is all good, but we have found that their is no way to determine compatibility without actually meeting in person. In fact, for us, about two out of every three people we meet from our internet ads, we know within minutes whether anything is going to happen with them or not, because often times, we just don't click in person like we seemed to through emails. That is why we prefer to meet at a club, if we don't hit it off, we can go our separate ways and the evening isn't wasted.

I would say though, that for us at least, we don't look at it as a date or like we are blind dating the couple. We are just meeting to see if we are compatible for sex, and no, I really don't need any other interest in common with them than that. Even when we meet someone for drinks at a vanilla bar or someplace, if we aren't hitting it off, we part ways immediately. Never had anyone take it personally yet, that I know of. Wouldn't really matter to me if they did though, we have busy lives, why waste an evening with someone that you aren't enjoying being with?