What are the first few things that come to your mind when a guy has never had a girlfriend? This question is for women only. I guess I'm just interested in what goes on inside women's heads so I can make it apparant (through life-style changes or telling stories) that I'm not that way. I guess that way if I state that I've never had a girlfriend up until this point (25 years old), it'll seem like a choice and not because I'm not attractive, unlovable, creepy or some other such thing.
I'm finding it difficult to socialize because people like asking personal questions. I'm a truthful guy, so usually I'll either give a little bit of info but not all that much, or change the topic a tactful way. But honestly, I don't want to come off as hiding something and admitting that I've never had a girlfriend is, well, not going to trigger any kind of pre-selection switch inside of the woman I'm talking to.
I found recently that it helps to lie. I've recently "added in" some false information about a life I never had with women, and I can tell it helped make the experience more positive for me. It was pretty non-arrogant as if I was talking naturally. I did it as an experiment. Like I'd tell an interesting story that happened (or may never happened) that included a girlfriend as one of the characters, or just saying she was present. Yeah, it's untruthful, but I'm getting better reactions.
I'm not sure how I feel about it though. After I reflected on it for a few days, I considered that I may as well pretend to have a life that I want until I actually have the life want. That seems to be healthier than being judged/victimized about my past, my social anxiety and my extreme introverted nature. I mean, you can basically say I lived a really unhealthy life up to my current age.
It's hard to forgot all of that and it seems that people want to know. I know they aren't probing. It's just that they are curious, and they want to trust me more. I get it. I guess I just don't want to say all the negative things that happened to me or the way my life was. Or talk about the sense of loss, the trapped feelings and lack of control over my life, the really bad direction my life was heading in right from the family I was born into, or extreme sorrow and guilt I felt on a day to day basis. Nobody wants to hear this shit and I certainly don't want to talk about and relive it.
Anyway, so what goes on inside your heads when you find information like this out? Honestly.
And I guess as an aside, what do you think of a person who really doesn't want to talk about their past or has nothing really positive to say about it? I mean, having no way to connect and share experiences on any of those levels.