Where are all the straight couples?

[Sweet_Candy 54]

I was in the lifestyle between 79-81 and left. Have been in the lifestyle again for a year. It seems to me the most of the couples in the lifestyle now are in it for the woman to have fun with other women without the men being involved. My memories of the lifestyle are of couples getting together and having a foursome of sex with little or no intimacy between the same sexes. Is this trend of girl on girl a regional thing? Or is the trend of the lifestyle in general? When we go out to the clubs it seems this is all we run into. The personal ad sites are not much better. Where are the straight couples? I feel like Rip Van Winkle.

[VegasLee 1,486]

Yes, things have changed greatly over the years in the Lifestyle. Most of the people in the Lifestyle don't play at all. They are there to watch, be watched, Dance or be social.

 

Laura is one of the few straight ladies we know in the lifestyle and we have been in it for many years. We have found that going to on premise clubs that allow single men tend to be better for us. We find a lot more people that play there and more men that will also play so she is not limited to just the bi women with men watching that way.

 

Even though we work online we have found online to not be a good place to find real players. Most online don't ever show up and if they do chances are they are not what they claimed to be online.

 

Check out some good on premise clubs that allow singles and I believe you will find what your looking for.

 

Good Luck.

[VanHlebar 187]

Well Mrs Van and I are new to the lifestyle but we have commented to each other about this often. It appears that almost every single profile that we read the lady is listed as either bi or bi-curious. We wonder how many of them really are or if they just say that thinking that is what most couples want.

 

Mrs Van is straight... she hasn't completely ruled out a bi encounter but I think it would be one of those things that just kind of happend during the heat of passion. The FF play is not what we are in this for, we are in as a couple to play as a couple and so far not having much luck with that part.

 

-Van

[mitzi54 15]

My wife is listed as Bi on our profile. Before I met her she had some FFM or FF encouners. We have only had one time where she played with the other woman while swinging. She is not specifically in it to play with other women, it's the experience with the both of us we love. If someone is looking for Bi female it a bonus, but not something expected.

[wolfnblu 15]

We are both straight, it says in our profile on both sites. I would actually consider myself "bi above the waist"...but that's not an option in the descriptors. We are also starting to get a little frustrated by all the supposedly bi women...no, I don't really believe that that many - a disproportionate number - of women are truly bisexual. We look at profiles and so many have pics of their lady going down on another woman, or she's going down on another woman. Not into that, here. It narrows down the number of potential playmates, definitely.

[WesternSwing 504]

In the past couple of years we've been in the lifestyle we have found that many of the women are bi, or bi with the right woman. However, we haven't found many where only the girls play and the guys watch. Most all are full-swap couples and the women can take or leave girl/girl play depending on the comfort level of the other person. It's not a must or prerequisite for playing. Being bi doesn't mean you're bi with everyone. We've played with couples where the husband is bi and he never made a move on me because he knew that was not my bag. And we have never excluded playing with a couple because the wife wasn't bi. It's not just about one sex act with us.

 

We stay away from the girl/girl only couples though, because 1) there is nothing there for me as a male, and 2) they seem to be a jealously train wreck waiting to happen.

 

Like Vegas Lee said, we do see several couples at many of the meet-and-greets that live on the fringe of the Lifestyle but they don't attend many of the house parties where all the real action happens.

 

Mr. WS

[CB_n_Red 16]

Is this trend of girl on girl a regional thing? Or is the trend of the lifestyle in general? When we go out to the clubs it seems this is all we run into. The personal ad sites are not much better. Where are the straight couples? I feel like Rip Van Winkle.

 

Red is straight. Not even remotely bi-curious. It hasn't stopped us having fun but it does seem to reduce the opportunities these days. What you describe seems pretty common in the UK as well, so it can't be a regional thing.

 

We have found that a lot of couples that claim to have a bi or bi-curious female actually don't (or at least the issue isn't pressed). We assume it is somehow de rigeur these days for ladies to be bi/curious so the claims are made. Equally we have found ourselves a few times in situations where the other female made assumptions about Red, that she only needed to be introduced to FF sex, to make her change her mind. Big mistake.

Needless to say, we don't see any of those people any more.

 

Given our "success" rate over the last year or so, I think Lee is right that the clubs are the best place to find the real players.

 

CB

[Happypair 15]

As an older, essentially straight couple, we really relate to many of the sentiments expressed here. Mama is listed as bi-curious because 1) she doesn't rule out at least a bit of experimentation, and 2) she doesn't want to appear too rigid in this "enlightened" era and thereby be eliminated from consideration. What we make clear with any new couple from the very beginning, however, is that anything bi must be considered a bonus, and unlikely at that. If it's an expectation, colour us gone!

When it comes to couples who seek only bi-females, or couples with bi females, we suspect we are just hearing the point of view of a jealous, controlling husband. He wants to boink other women; he wants a girlie show because that doesn't threaten him, but he is terrified when he considers the possibility of me getting within pronging range of his bride. God forbid, I might be... competent.

As to where is the best place to meet couples.. our experience is that ads are okay, clubs maybe, but referrals are best of all. Friends steer you to other friends, the new people have already been run through the bullshit filter. Networking works in sales jobs, and it's great in the lifestyle as well.

Cheers, everybody.

[good times 990]

Yep, we have noticed this also. We are both straight and only play with other couples.

 

We run into a lot of couples at clubs that the female only plays with other females and the guy just watches. Another thing we have noticed lately is that more and more single women are showing up at the clubs, but they aren't bi, they are lesbians and are only looking to play with females. I think that this is a result of the increase in acceptance of same sex play at the clubs. Word has spread that it is easy pickings for the lesbians and they are starting to show up in larger numbers. We have even seen lesbian couples at the clubs. Personally I hope this is just a temporary thing, but I doubt it.

[mitzi54 15]

We run into a lot of couples at clubs that the female only plays with other females and the guy just watches.

 

That's interesting. We have never run into a couple at a club where the guy just wants to watch.

 

We have not seen an influx of single women at the clubs either.

 

There is always the chance we are just missing it. We don't get to hit the clubs a whole lot, but we try to get out once a month.

[VanHlebar 187]

don't tell me that... Mrs Van and I are going to a club this weekend for the first time and we are hoping to have a good time ... I am sure we still will but I really think that most of the ladies are listed as bi b/c they feel they have to or Happypair said, it is a husband that wants to be with other women but won't allow his wife to enjoy the fun. We have also run into alot of "couples" that I think are really single males with old girlfriend pics in their profiles. We have started asking for couple pics with faces just recently and we have noticed that after the initial email we don't usually hear back from them

 

-Van

[VegasLee 1,486]

Things I have noted in the last few years on this subject.

 

Many MEN are the ones handling the "on line" profiles, not the ladies. Seems that many ladies on their profile are BI but they just don't know it yet but their husband puts it on their profile for her. Oh ya, she just might be curious.

 

We have had many more single ladies showing up at the club in the last year but they are not lesbians looking for women. Most of them DON'T even want women. They are there for the guys.

 

We have also had an explosion of couples that come to the club that don't play at all. Seems they just like to watch others, get turned on and go home to have their own partty. Also many that only the WOMEN play. Either with other women or with men while the husbands watch. That has become very common. I am guessing once again as a turn on then they go home and play with each other.

 

A bit of a surprise to us has been that we see many even come to Convention each year and the same things happen. The couple is not playing with anyone else or just the women is playing, the husband watches then off they go to their own room at some point by theirself.

 

Times have changed, people are joining this lifestyle for many of their own reasons. It is not like it used to be years ago but as long as it is not hurting anyone else and they don't try to change the rest of us I guess there is nothing wrong with it. I only get ticked off when the "new swingers" try to tell the world and the rest of us that their way is the right way. There is no right or wrong way, what works for you is your right way.

[SW_PA_Couple 4,019]

Well Mrs Van and I are new to the lifestyle but we have commented to each other about this often. It appears that almost every single profile that we read the lady is listed as either bi or bi-curious. We wonder how many of them really are or if they just say that thinking that is what most couples want. . . . . -Van

 

Well, we are not curious about anything. We are both straight. But this has not proven to be a barrier for meeting people, neither those who list themselves as bisexual nor those who do not. Neither of us would run screaming out of a room if a same-gender person incidentally or even intentionally touched us. We suspect, as another member posted, that bi-curious is often put up at a profile owing to the perception that it seems expected. We have, however, observed at swingers' clubs that a predominance of bisexual women are in attendance. May not sound politically correct, but I will offer the theory that bi women are attracted to the dance floor -- like to see themselves and the other females move to the music. Straight women seem to be frustrated in getting their straight husbands onto the dance floor for any reason.

[WesternSwing 504]

Many MEN are the ones handling the "on line" profiles, not the ladies. Seems that many ladies on their profile are BI but they just don't know it yet but their husband puts it on their profile for her. Oh ya, she just might be curious.

We have seen quite a few husbands putting-up profiles hoping their wife will get into swinging. Had several of those contact us recently.

 

We have had many more single ladies showing up at the club in the last year but they are not lesbians looking for women. Most of them DON'T even want women. They are there for the guys.

Ditto. At the club last week there were two newly single females looking to have some unattached fun.

 

Times have changed, people are joining this lifestyle for many of their own reasons. It is not like it used to be years ago but as long as it is not hurting anyone else and they don't try to change the rest of us I guess there is nothing wrong with it. I only get ticked off when the "new swingers" try to tell the world and the rest of us that their way is the right way. There is no right or wrong way, what works for you is your right way.

Amen, brother.

 

Mr. WS

[ohcurcpl 15]

I have thought about this as well. I am listed as bi (mrs) but it doesn't mean that I am bi with everyone. Just because I am, doesn't mean you have to be. If it happens, hey, bonus for me. But then again, if we start out as full swap, and the female 1/2 and I start enjoying each other, then the hubbies get left watching. I haven't heard him complain, so I guess thats a good thing.

 

I guess my point is, just because I list myself as bi, don't exclude us as prospective playmates.

[lovedoctor 15]

I listed myself as bi-curious - and it is a nice diversion at times, but definately not the main attraction for me. And I agree that it has to be with the right female. What I have noticed in the "straight" women is that I feel somewhat inhibited because I'm afraid if I touch them by accident, then they might freak out. I haven't found the "bi-curious" or "bi" women to provide the drama that either one of the "straight" women we've played with have. Granted, I don't have a great deal of experience, but that's just my opinion to date.

 

~LD

[mrs good times 73]

I guess my point is, just because I list myself as bi, don't exclude us as prospective playmates.

 

The first thing I look at on a profile is if the woman is bi or bi-curious and it does affect my decision because I have had too many bi women try to convert me.

 

Like wolfnblu said, I am comfortable with "above the waist" play with the right person and we have played with couples with a bi-female but I always make my limits known well in advance and if they are okay with it then we will meet.

 

I don't freak out if another woman touches me during play, when your all piled on one bed its bound to happen it's when they intentionally break my rules that I get mad.

[just1gurl 15]

All bi stuff was not surprising to me, but turning me off to the idea of swinging. I'd really want to play with boy things.

 

I'm glad you posted this question and even happier that many people prefer the same.

 

my politically correct disclaimer: just my opinion of my own preferences.

[sereneiders 263]

Before geting into this, my wyfe claimed to be staight, she said to me "NO WAY, I WON'T be with a gal, EVER, you may dream of watching me going down with another woman, but DON'T YOU DARE TO ASK, that is just a dream, ok sweetie?"

 

The first experience we had was a fivesome (two couples and a single female) she ate every an each one of her words about this, easing the swallowing with the other females juices facelick . And later one she admited she loved it

 

So, I see your point here, and perhaps it's right, and this just show the way our society evolved regarding homosexuality. Better say, this exposes all the cultural and educational bonds that still hold males from adpoting the same "bi" actitudes females seems to adopt more and more often.

 

To support this, my wyfe told me several times that, if she were a male, she would be bi because this way she would get the best of both worlds: to be able to penetrate and to be penetrated, and this may be a way to express the loose of bonds women were able to achieve and we still didn't.

 

In the other hand, I am straight, I had an experience with another guy and I was unable to take the emotional aspects affecting my identity, and I know I am not up to face these emotional aspects again, even when enjoying some phisical aspects, like having a finger up my ass (or even a toy like a strap on, altough a recent surgery forbid me to go that far), but from a woman.

 

THis lead to ask myself the impact the cultural and aducational bonds have in the way I built my identity, and if these bonds weren't there, if I would end up jumping in a bi experience after "theoretically deny" the chance just as my wyfe did.

[Sweet_Candy 54]

Glad to know we're not alone in our frustrations.

 

We've gone to LS clubs in Austin, Dallas, Houston and San Antonio and have experienced mostly girl on girl play in the clubs. If we had only gone to one club we might have thought it was that particular club but that’s not the case. Already knew it was regional and it saddens us to hear it’s a national phenomenon as well.

 

Let me say we're not against bisexuality in the lifestyle but it's not what we're looking for in the LS. When we first started this together Candy listed herself as bi-curious and explored the girl on girl thing and had me change her interest back to straight. It did nothing for her and honestly it does nothing for me watching two people of the same sex play with each other.

 

We are truly straight and have no problem with light touching during play. The problem is finding straight couples to play with.

[just1gurl 15]

It did nothing for her and honestly it does nothing for me watching two people of the same sex play with each other.

 

We are truly straight and have no problem with light touching during play.

 

I concur.

 

No. Not ever. Women are to damn moody.

[Uomo 15]

When it comes to couples who seek only bi-females, or couples with bi females, we suspect we are just hearing the point of view of a jealous, controlling husband. He wants to boink other women; he wants a girlie show because that doesn't threaten him, but he is terrified when he considers the possibility of me getting within pronging range of his bride. God forbid, I might be... competent.

 

My thoughts exactly. My wife is (in truth) bisexual but ... we list her as straight. I can't stand possessive (insecure) male hypcorites. Pathetic.

[EvilMJ 65]

Well, I am bi...but as someone else had said, I am not bi with everyone. It's just like being straight, you only play with who you are attracted to. However, I fully respect people being straight, and we have played with straight couples. Being bi doesn't mean you are going to force it on anyone.

 

My two pet peeves on this subject - husbands who want their wives to play with other women so bad that the woman tried to be bi sexual for them. It becomes clear very early on that they are not. The other is bi women who think that they can change a straight woman given the chance. Sorry it doesn't work that way, if someone is not attracted to women you are not going to force them/convince them to be.

 

So I guess I gauge it by the couple. If they are straight, then we play as a straight couple would, if they are bi and I am attracted to the wife, I play as a bi woman. But I also respect people who are not interested in playing with someone who is bisexual. I don't feel offended if someone is not comfortable with a bisexual woman, we are all entiled to our own preferences, that's just how it works. You can't take it personally when you get rejected, it happens, it is a part of swinging.

[WesternSwing 504]

Well, I am bi...but as someone else had said, I am not bi with everyone. It's just like being straight, you only play with who you are attracted to. However, I fully respect people being straight, and we have played with straight couples. Being bi doesn't mean you are going to force it on anyone.

Mrs. WS is the same way. She plays with who she is attracted to, and she is not anymore attracted to every woman then she is every man.

 

My two pet peeves on this subject - husbands who want their wives to play with other women so bad that the woman tried to be bi sexual for them. It becomes clear very early on that they are not.

These are usually the same guys who don't want another man touching their wife, but they have no problem being all over other guy's wives.

 

So I guess I gauge it by the couple. If they are straight, then we play as a straight couple would, if they are bi and I am attracted to the wife, I play as a bi woman. But I also respect people who are not interested in playing with someone who is bisexual. I don't feel offended if someone is not comfortable with a bisexual woman, we are all entiled to our own preferences, that's just how it works. You can't take it personally when you get rejected, it happens, it is a part of swinging.

That is exactly it. We play it by ear. I do get kind of funny with those that won't play with a couple because one member or the other is bi. Since most people would not push the bi thing if someone was uncomfortable with it, excluding those that are is just closed-minded. Just because Mrs. WS is bi doesn't mean she is a) attracted to the other woman and b) would not respect the other's boundries. Granted there are those that will not, but in our experience they are the very small minority.

 

Mr. WS

[Sweet_Candy 54]

We have no problem playing with another couple who has the female listed as bi. But it has been our experience they want a bi female as well and there lies our problem. When they hear Candy doesn't care for bi-play they fade into the woodwork.

[Paramours 15]

Being from the same region as you sweet_candy, we agree with your perception...but it seems primarily applicable to our 'encounters' at clubs. I think what we often see is 'showboating' by bi-curious women in couples who enjoy dabbling in the lifestyle -- which is fine. We believe that 'whatever floats your boat' is great -- but our preferences may be different.

 

Lately, we've had the most fun with straight couples we've known for some time and had some chemistry with both mentally and physically. We've also had the fortune to meet some really nice couples at house parties, where you have a bit more time to get to be 'social' than you might in an off-premise club environment -- and the potential for some 'quiet time' is better. You seem like a great couple, and luck will turn your way -- we know we've felt priveleged to meet couples like y'all and have it turn into some mind-blowing, fantastically fun play time. Sometimes it's just falling in with the right group of like-minded swingers.

[destin-ez 15]

Sweet Candy, nice post......We're very new to this scene, we just posted an ad on SLS and "WE" decided to list her as (thanks to reading this website) "Above the waist Bi-curious". What this means to us is, she/we will not seek out Bi fun, but....... It's a long story sort of, but early in her life she found out that FF play did not turn her off, nor does she seek it out, but thanks to a certain lady at a certain stripper's club, we know anything can happen. Now, after all these years as a married couple and finding out that we are compatible with the swinging lifestyle, we know this is an OPTION. That's all. If it happens, it happens

 

Neither myself nor her would initiate FF play, however, as it has been said many times here before, when you separate love from sex and are enjoying a 3 or 4 or more some, well......who knows

 

By the way, if your're ever in Wisconsin....

 

Mr. and Mrs. D

[fishdad 15]

Hello , we are just getting into the swing, and all we want is a cuple. that just wants to hang out and if things get going from there then we will see.We dont even know if this is for us but we are willing to try ,just thought i would share this with you ...

[KajiKurai 15]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Happypair

When it comes to couples who seek only bi-females, or couples with bi females, we suspect we are just hearing the point of view of a jealous, controlling husband. He wants to boink other women; he wants a girlie show because that doesn't threaten him, but he is terrified when he considers the possibility of me getting within pronging range of his bride. God forbid, I might be... competent.

 

My thoughts exactly. My wife is (in truth) bisexual but ... we list her as straight. I can't stand possessive (insecure) male hypcorites. Pathetic.

 

My SO and I only seek bi-females. She simply has no desire whatsoever to be with another man. She handles the profiles and contacts. We're pretty tired of being approached by people that don't fit the bill. Couples, single men, etc.... We don't seek couples for the reason I have stated. Not because I'm a hypocrite or insecure. We are not going to waste a couple's time because we don't fit their bill.

[sereneiders 263]

KajiKurai,

 

How come, you get suspicious about other people's doing exaclty the same you do, because you don't trust they may have the same motivations you're telling us you have?

 

When I read the first paragraph, I was about to say you were wrong. But then you gave the argument proving how wrong you are, but you apply that only to you as an exception.

 

I think it is harsh from you to assume people have a double standard when doing things that for you doesn't imply such a double standard. Who are you to tell?

[Seren_dipity 16]

My impressions have been that more women are bi than the guys... I've wondered whether this was really the case or whether... well, you fill in the blanks.

[ANGEDKY(mr) 100]

Seren, this is how I read the post................

 

As an older, essentially straight couple, we really relate to many of the sentiments expressed here. Mama is listed as bi-curious because 1) she doesn't rule out at least a bit of experimentation, and 2) she doesn't want to appear too rigid in this "enlightened" era and thereby be eliminated from consideration. What we make clear with any new couple from the very beginning, however, is that anything bi must be considered a bonus, and unlikely at that. If it's an expectation, colour us gone!

When it comes to couples who seek only bi-females, or couples with bi females, we suspect we are just hearing the point of view of a jealous, controlling husband. He wants to boink other women; he wants a girlie show because that doesn't threaten him, but he is terrified when he considers the possibility of me getting within pronging range of his bride. God forbid, I might be... competent.

As to where is the best place to meet couples.. our experience is that ads are okay, clubs maybe, but referrals are best of all. Friends steer you to other friends, the new people have already been run through the bullshit filter. Networking works in sales jobs, and it's great in the lifestyle as well.

Cheers, everybody.

 

this is what Kaji was commenting on when he said

 

My SO and I only seek bi-females. She simply has no desire whatsoever to be with another man. She handles the profiles and contacts. We're pretty tired of being approached by people that don't fit the bill. Couples, single men, etc.... We don't seek couples for the reason I have stated. Not because I'm a hypocrite or insecure. We are not going to waste a couple's time because we don't fit their bill.

[sweetmelissa 15]

Just adding my two cents: As the female half of a soft-swap couple - bi- bicurious or whatever you want to call me- I believe in our case the reason we end up in many of these "girl-girl" encounters is because they are less threatening to couples like us who have soft-swap rules. The thing is, sometimes flirting with full-swap couples you can feel pressured, or like you "aren't good enough" for them. So while we might want more contact for my hubby (oral definitely), he often ends up on the sidelines because that is where the comfort level is for the other couples in the room.

 

My husband is certainly not a "jealous, controlling husband who wants to boink other women/ or who wants a girlie show because that doesn't threaten him" as described in ANGEDKY's previous post. As a matter of fact, we started out with him encouraging me into these encounters, only to find out I really liked the bi-female contact, so now we naturally gravitate toward couples who have similar interests.

 

Incidentally, we are the couple where my husband is now interested in going further than I am right now, because he is understandably tired of sitting on the sidelines. Funny, many of you who responded to my post sympathizing with his viewpoint also posted on this thread saying you had noticed this trend toward bi-female play and many of you seemed annoyed by it. Interesting....

[newbees001 15]

My husband and I are both straight. We were also wondering about this because i'm not into women. My husband even have to wash his mouth before he can kiss me again after being down there . I'll be willing to try to flirt with a woman but I will not eat or touch her down there, but then again I might not want to do anything once I'm in that situation. My husband's fantasy (like any other men) is to see me with another woman, but he's just going to have to wait and see if I get comfortable with it. He's lucky I even consider "swinging" because he's been bugging me about it for a long time. We've talked a lot about this though and we both agree that if either one of us does not feel that we can actually do this, then we'll just leave and say it's not for us. We can proudly say that we at least gave it a try. Maybe we'll just watch other and have great sex later on with each other. It's not like we don't have great sex all the time, but something new can spice things up after all we've been together for 12 years (married for 10). I guess with the women thing, we all just have to look hard and soon we'll find that precious couple (straight) that we will get along with. Good luck on finding your straight couple and hopefully we find one ourselves. Happy swinging

[eruditesdw 29]

As a man I must be way off due to the fact I'm not excited about my wife having fun with another lady. Yes it happens but it's so....Ho Hum....Man!! What the heck is wrong with me? I must be getting old.

[WesternSwing 504]

When it comes to couples who seek only bi-females, or couples with bi females, we suspect we are just hearing the point of view of a jealous, controlling husband. He wants to boink other women; he wants a girlie show because that doesn't threaten him, but he is terrified when he considers the possibility of me getting within pronging range of his bride. God forbid, I might be... competent.

When I came back with a little more time and read this statement I was stunned. Now, I'd agree that many of the couples only seeking bi-females is doing it for the sake of the male. We have met many couples like this and most all the females would like a full swap but their SO's are too jealous to let it happen.

 

However, the comment about "or couples with bi females" is way off base. Mrs. WS is bi. She loves to play with women. She doesn't do it for the benefit of me, although she knows I like to see it, but that is because I like to see her having a good time regardless of whether it is a male or a female. This is the case with most all of the couples we know with "bi-female" listed in their profile, especially if it says they are seeking couples.

 

Mr. WS

[Guest CandPinSA]

Wow.... VERY INTERSTING SUBJECT. Mr C here.... what I find so interesting is that I see the exact same thing.... mostly bi/biC women either single or in a couple. I also agree with many of the sentiments here that often times, it's some jealous, controlling male who just doesn't want his woman to be with another man. What interests me the most here though, is that I (MR C) am the one that's bi. LOL We are looking for another bi male for me to have fun with (Mrs P and I together only! never me alone). No I'm not one of those sissy types... in fact, I'm very masculine.... 5'7", 185#, deep voice, 44" chest, and relatively athletic. We just agree, that this is not about cheating, but mutual enjoyment. Doing it alone would be cheating.... but I digress..... In truth, I would love to for me and 'him' (whoever he may end up being) both pleasing each other and pleasing Mrs P. She however, has said that actually allowing him to penetrate her is totally off limits.... for her. We actually almost had an argument becuase I want her to... however, as is the golden rule here... NO MEANS NO.... If he and I are enjoying ourselves and she decides she wants to do him.... then stick me in her mouth and stick him in her and take the ride!!! Sounds like fun to me! Anyway, all this is just to say, I agree with some here on one side, and agree with many here on the other side. It's her choice whether she lets him do her... Either way turns me on greatly. I too would love to see her with another woman... but she is totally straight and has no desire to do that... I'm ok with that. I find it funny though that the 'bisexual' roles, for us, are reversed and she won't do the guy LOL.... even at my encouragement. LOL

 

Just wanted to throw that in the mix.

 

Be safe, have fun, and enjoy.

 

Mr C

[DGrey 28]

We've encountered a few straight couples who expressed interested in us and we unfortunately for them, turned them down. Part of the excitement Dino and I get from swingning is the opportunity it presents for me to explore my bisexual side. Typically, when we're with a couple and the guys need a break, it gives us something to do while the guys power nap which is what happens with a couple whom we have a great relationship. All in all, I just find it more appealing to be with a couple where I know I can have just as much fun with the woman as I can with the man.

 

E

[LICouple4u 15]

As a man I must be way off due to the fact I'm not excited about my wife having fun with another lady. Yes it happens but it's so....Ho Hum....Man!! What the heck is wrong with me? I must be getting old.

 

You are not alone at all. I am most definitely bi, I definitely enjoy being with another woman, but it doesn't do much for Mr. LIC.

 

That being said, I'm the one that handles most of the online contacts - just because I have the time to. Mr. LIC reads the messages afterwards and trusts that I will handle it properly. Through trial and error, we've communicated each of our wishes, what we seek, etc.

 

We have NO issue playing with a straight couple and it's somewhat preferred for us. This makes sure that each of us are involved in the action, versus the men just sitting there watching what's going on. In some previous instances, there's been contact from the men while the women are playing.

 

In my fantasy utopia, this kind of issue could be discussed up front within the first few contacts (online at least) and then the other can decide how important that is for them.

 

As for the clubs, I have to admit that we've visited a local on premises club a lot and it's unfortunately been a turn off to us. We really prefer private play where both of us are involved. We've had it happen where the wife of a couple is off either just chatting (could even be next to us) and the husband is all over me and Mr. LIC is left to just watch - no thanks... If we club again, it would definitely be off-premises.

[Sweet_Candy 54]

Some threads never die!

[kandr2000 15]

I am writing as a very bi female. I have known for many years that I am bi-sexual. Us being with another woman is definatley more for me than him. Although he enjoys it, whether it is watching or participating. We are interested in all things including full swap, although I would prefer to play with a couple that has a bi or bi-curious female, because Im very attracted to women, but would respect someone if they werent bi or were bi above the waist.

 

The aspect of hooking up with other woman was a big part of the getting into swinging. BUT I have a girlfriend I can have anytime Id like, so it is not that big of a deal to hook up just bi couples. I love men more than women anyday, but just am very attracted to women. I have not hooked up with anyone through SLS or internet so far. It has been bi neighbor, bi (hubbys) ex, and I would imagine bi-curious best friend. Then a a couple other woman.

 

Also, for the record as far as our profile on SLS, he has nothing to do with it really. I wrote profile, I send out emails, he picks out some of the ones he likes, but all contact is through me. He just is along for the ride, lol. So far a good ride its been.

 

I also think that bi-sexuality is much more "cool" and more accepted now-a-days. My daughter is in Jr. High and has friends who are "bi" or think it is cool to say they are. Even with that fact that it seems to be so accepted the only one to know about me being bi in my family is my Gay step-brother.