Watching wife make love vs just having sex.

[EricSacto2]

We haven't been to swing clubs but my wife and I have had fun with other couples and threesomes before. It's usually just plain sex - the other man would just f**k my wife while I would do his wife or just watch.

However, my wife has had a long-term lover at work and last month we had our first threesome with him. When they got together, it was just more than sex - more like making love. It was very intimate - they would stare each other in the eyes and have long drawn out kisses. Watching them really turned me on and after he pulled out and came on her stomach, I took my position inside her and had one of the better orgasms in a long time.

Has anybody else had this experience? I think when the act transcends the physical aspect, it becomes much more erotic.

I like watching Mrs naughty fuck but I would like to think it is just sex. She usualy gets to know the guy some first and develops a little bit of a friendly relationship before she fucks him but I would have to say that it is not love by any means.

If we got to that point with someone I think we would have gone to far.


The last time we hooked up with a couple she and him were definately having passionate sex. Which was cool with me. I think she might have even forgotten I was there.

But I dont think passionate sex and love are the same.

[Brit_Pair]

For us, getting into this has always been about enhancing our sex lives. Emotionally, we seek nothing from our playmates, and so we would have no desire to watch each other making love with other people. Making love is something that we do together, and only together. And the sex we have with others is still sufficiently erotic to meet our needs.

[Spoomonkey]

For us - swinging is about sex. Mrs Spoomonkey is an incredibly passionate woman and we have had at least on situation where the way she acts in bed has given a fella the wrong idea. However, it has never really looked like "making love" - just like she is really into the guy she is with.

We have what we call "under the covers" kind of love-making, which is usually giggly, tender, slow, etc. But most of the time, we loose ourselves in hot "Monkey Love". Either way though, there is something different about when we are together. When I am with another woman - or when she is with another man - it just isn't the same.

And I really wouldn't want it to be. I wouldn't say it is boring or "run of the mill" but it really isn't the same at all. It is hard to put my finger on it, really.

When we exchange partners, I can still feel a connection when we glance at each other that I have no doubt goes unnoticed by the ones we are with - and I am positive that the best couples we are with share that same kind of unspoken communication.

But - when the night is over and the clothes are back on; when we are walking to the car, tired and smiling - we are usually on our way home to do the one thing that we didn't do at the club: make love.

Spoomonkey

[meowkittyhascla]

I make LOVE to my husband, but have down and dirty sex with our playmates. There is a difference! Woe to the playmate who thinks anything else and tries to come between us and believe me there are people like that! You have to watch for them., but that is another thread.

[fun_pairTX]

We are with the rest on this one. We are in the lifestyle for sex only, the emotional committment is only between ourselves.

[PrtyinDuo]

Making love is something that we do together, and only together. And the sex we have with others is still sufficiently erotic to meet our needs.

Very well said...and...Dito Brit_Pair...



Enjoy!

[MrsBliss]

Originally posted by Brit_Pair
Making love is something that we do together, and only together.

We did not start swinging yet but this is definitely my number one rule. I want to and need to feel the difference between swinging-sex and sex with my husband. If I would ever have more than sexual feelings for someone, I would run away very fast!

[b_and_sc]

Making love is ONLY for my husband...sex is fun and ok to be shared

I guess if you are ok with it, then it may work for you guys...but I could never....

b

[roggiesgirl]

Originally posted by MrsBliss

We did not start swinging yet but this is definitely my number one rule. I want to and need to feel the difference between swinging-sex and sex with my husband. If I would ever have more than sexual feelings for someone, I would run away very fast!

Dito

Yup, what she said!

[couplegone2wild]

Making love is strictly for my hubby as others have said. I do really get turned on by eye contact. I can't tell you what it is, but when I make eye contact with a playmate during sex it just makes it even better.
I also look for and watch the Mr. I make a point of no long drawn out kisses. If I would kiss hubby like that, i kiss no one else like that. He gets my best. As I've told him I love him like I love no other.

J

[MrsBliss]

Originally posted by couplegone2wild
. I do really get turned on by eye contact. I can't tell you what it is, but when I make eye contact with a playmate during sex it just makes it even better. J

I think I have the same thing. Eye contact makes it more intens I guess.

[wrnakedru]

I remember a couple several years ago that it was so obvious in watching them that the enjoyment for him was in viewing her, no matter what she was doing or who she was doing it with. He seemed to be of the opinion she had hung the moon, and had done so perfectly. His eyes never left her for long, and he was also constantly snapping photos of her in action - from dancing, to flirting all the way to hard core activity - his total kick seemed to be in the viewing of her.

At the time, we 'girls' discussed the fella and his seeming obssession with a degree of befuddlement. We all agreed his worship of her was quite a testimony to his love of her. At the same time, none of us could bring ourselves to approach him for any playtime activity. We just didn't think we could entrance him to the point of any of us being capable of providing him with the pleasure he obviously was getting just watching her.

It's not that any of us was looking for anything other than sexual activity. It simply seemed his absorption with her precluded the possibility of that even occurring.

This is the only couple I have known where that really seemed to be the gentleman's whole pleasure - watching her.

I believe the eye contact is a normal thing with most couples - it's an affirmation of their unity in a way.

[JustAskJulie]

I have friends that are exactly as you described WR. To the point where even on the times when a girl did try to do anything with the guy it really did nothing for him. His wife is the only woman he is really interested in.

As far as the original question goes, could it be that it's more just a Passion of knowing each other and enjoying one another that comes with taking the time to really get to know and care about the other person/ people involved. Not love so to speak as the term "Making Love" implies but just a much higher level of passion so that what you are watching is more than just rote sex.

[EricSacto2]

Good clarification especially about the eye contact.

I suppose "making love" is too strong of a term. I guess it's more "passion" than just raunchy sex. It's like there are porn movies where you have tab 'a' going into slot 'b' and repeat and then there's more erotic films which can get you really excited even though it's not as graphic.