We had a MFM but now wife getting too attached to the male

[smpdjd]

okay this is gonna be my last post. i feel like I'm having to defend myself because some people seem to think that all relationships are cut and dried and the varous scenarios and solutions can be plucked from some swingers manual or something.
this latest person now suspects i 'm making this up..I'll say this and then I'm done..My wife speaks great English, she's also an excellent speller, won her school spelling bee in fact, but she is not comfortable writing.. I know many many people who hate to write and English is their first language!!!!

So I'm sorry but all this disecting of whether or not this is real has worn me out. Believe me It's real, it's insane sounding I know, but it's real nontheless.

I'm on the boards looking to get help and keep the many kind people updated because they asked me to. There are moments when it gets really really intense and it helps me to post here..is this so bad? Forgive me for being in a state of shock but i think the steady increase in negative unconstructive postings means i've overstayed my welcome..I don't need to be berated by people who don't even know me and I certainly don't need to apologise or explain how imperfect I am because i didn't see the infamous red flags flying..life is simple, relationships are not.

[InNY]

Chauk this up to experience.

Next time, make damn sure before you allow another guy to fuck your wife.

[DavidHeather]

When we first got into swinging separately we told the person we were going to fuck that (depending if we were at the house or somewhere else) vid cam/ cell phone would be on so the SO (significant other) could watch/hear. This allowed everyone to participate and reduced the chance of insecurities.

Originally Posted by smpdjd

hey all.. so we had this delicious 3 some with a guy.. the first time we'd ever done anything remotley like it..it was a joint decision and we both really liked it.. but my wife and the guy got pretty intense and now she can't stop thinking about him.. so much so that she managed to get in touch with him and he stopped by her work today.. she's all confused about her feelings.. we have kids, been happily married for a long time, truly have a great sex life.. but now she wants to sleep with him one on one and i am very confused about this.. so is she..part of me wants to let her have this experience but I'm afraid she'll want more and it'll turn into an affair and then we have a giant mess on out hands with the kids and all and the other part of me is hurt and jealous and i feel the neanderathal inside me lurking.. it's not as if the guy was a great lover either, far from it.. wouldn't go down on her,it's just that she's been a loyal faithful wonderful wife but now she's let the genie out of the bottle.. not sure what the hell i'm supposed to do.. thoughts?

[DBL D]

Originally Posted by smpdjd

...This shouldn't be advice on how to swing or not.. i for one am really grateful that this board exists..it really helped me to read what people said and yes I lost it for a bit because i just couldn't see what was going on.. also very human...it's one of those situations that just backfired horribly.. we should have started slowly and explored the deeper stuff but we rushed into it like a new drug and cracked open what we thought was a stable relationship.. right now as i write this.. i don't even want her back.. it hurts to write that.. but I can't get past the idea that she'll be holding his hand and laughing her beautiful laugh and wearing her sexy lingerie for him....that's too much to handle now and I doubt I'll be able to get past it anytime in the foreseeable future.. the longer she stays away the less I'll want her back.. she knows this..i suspect she'll regret it all one day but then again maybe not,,..... here' s to the future..
s

Sounds like extreme jealousy and now you are denying the relationship to give you some peace. Well, Bro. If you ever had a chance to learn something now's the time. Change the way you feel right now about possessing another human being. Just isn't worth it. Commitment is one thing, pride of ownership is another.

Male D