Ladies, ever intimidated by the other woman's body?

[2TexasTornados]

I'm the Mrs. of the couple...

Maybe this has been covered before, or maybe I'm too new at this and that's why things like this cross my mind. We have a couple on Swing Lifestyle who contacted us first, and they seem fun so far. Here's the ONLY reason so far I'm concerned. The woman has a HOT body. In her pics, I can see every ab muscle. She has great skin, tight everything, on it goes. I'm in no way obese (size 6 jeans, 36C cups) but I have stretch marks, a C-section scar, boobs that would never be mistaken for artificial. I'm 34 and have the confidence that the thirties bring a woman... most of the time. But for some reason the thought of bouncing around in the same room with this woman's body that does NOT bounce, makes me want to hide.

Even though we're new at this, so far every experience we've had has been positive, and I hate to be the party pooper at this point and not be into this couple just because "she's prettier". In the meantime I've revved up my workout routine, but other than that - any suggestions or thoughts from any of you who may have found yourself in a similar situation?

[havefuninsun]

Girl -- I have no idea what you look like, but I KNOW you've got it going on. How? You're a swinger, baby.

I have been in the same room with women who have nicer bodies than me, and by comparison, not so much nicer. Mr. Fun has enjoyed each of these women -- women with stretch marks only reminds him (and me) that she is the mother of children. I, too, have a C-section scar, and although I've been asked if that's what it is, really, I forget it's there and no play partner has ever been grossed out by it. It's part of me.

Remember -- this is about VARIETY on all accounts. I've enjoyed everyone I've had the pleasure of meeting. These playmates have been different than Mr. Fun. So don't be shy; be the confident woman that you are.

Now kids, go out and play, and try to behave yourselves (uhm ... not ...) <wink>

[prettylady]

You know funny thing about stretch marks is that some people seem interested rather then bothered by them. Dog was rubbing my back once then started lightly stroking my stretch marks on my hips, this bothered me and I asked him to stop, to this he replied "I like them and how they feel". So I let him. Now just this past weekend we played with a couple and when we were done and just laying there chatting, the gentleman was stroking my stretch marks. I have a good body, strong abs, nice skin, so why stroke the stretch marks insted of the abs? I think with some people it is nice to see and feel that you are indeed a REAL person. Take pride in your stretch marks, they are a trophy of the increadible thing you did by bringing a child into the world.
Oh and no matter how HOT your female friend is, she has a hang up too. She maybe thinking you have a prettier smile, nicer eyes, better legs, yadda yadda yadda.
I have a playcouple who comment about my body and how hot I am, but you know I would give anything to light up a room the way the Mrs does.
Relax and have fun
Your friend,
Prettylady

[SJK977]

The Mrs. here has expressed concerns over the other F in profiles we've looked at many times. She is more comfortable with women who have bodies like hers, or at least those who have a little something extra, so that's one aspect we look for in playmates. So far, we have never encountered any problems after playing though, as most have fit that description. We've only been in the lifestyle for about a year, and with that only a few play experiences. She seems to be getting more comfortable, and less concerned about this each time we play, so maybe it's something that just has to work itself out.

[Tia Vampire]

She must find you in some way attractive, as you said, she contacted you first. I was always told that stretch marks are badges of a real woman. I always thought it was the genatal area. Anyway, i agree with the rest of the folks here. Enjoy yourself and stop stressing over nothing.

[gatorvol64]

You get confidence in your 30s and a "who cares" attitude in your 40s...at least I seem to be. All these women who have responded to you are correct. Prettylady, however, said what I needed to hear even before swinging...no matter how hot this women is, she has something about herself she doesn't like. We all do. That's just the way things are. If you like and are comfortable with everything else about this couple, just go for it and have a great time.

Vol

[blondie77]

"Oh and no matter how HOT your female friend is, she has a hang up too. She maybe thinking you have a prettier smile, nicer eyes, better legs, yadda yadda yadda."
prettylady
..................

Ditto! And very very well said Prettylady! I think we women worry way to much about what others are thinking of our bodies, when in truth they are probably just as worried about some aspect of themselves. I can say with all honesty that when we're playing with someone the last thing I'm doing is scrutinizing her body to find flaws. I personally could care less. I focus instead on the pleasure we're giving each other and the fun we're having. Body issues are so common...both men and women have issues...but don't let that prevent you from having a wonderful time. I'm sure they will both think you are beautiful for sharing such an intimate part of yourself with them. Have fun!

[Menage_a_Trois]

Dito to everyone's comment thus far! You are not alone, I understand completely. Mrs. Menage and Myself are polar opposites. She is 31 and I'm am a ripe 45. She is 6'1" and I a mere 5'6". She has the body of a goddess and I well of woman who has had two very rough pregnancy's bearing three children and a life time of letting it go . She is Platinum Blonde and I am a Brunette. I can go on and on about the differences both superficial and internal but the true is we each offer incredible gifts to others who cross our paths.

She with her lighthearted and youthful approach to life and I with my years of wisdom and understanding can bring a man to knees. Each in our own ways. So rejoice in the woman you are and who life has molded. For she can NEVER be you and you can NEVER be her!

The Other Mrs. Menage.
:Three:

[daisy girl]

Originally Posted by Menage_a_Trois

She with her lighthearted and youthful approach to life and I with my years of wisdom and understanding can bring a man to knees. Each in our own ways. So rejoice in the woman you are and who life has molded. For she can NEVER be you and you can NEVER be her!

The Other Mrs. Menage.
:Three:

What an eloquent comment. I am 5'5 and 122. I am not voluptuous by any means. I am somewhat in shape. I sometimes do not feel like a real grown up. But...many people love my body. Honestly, sometimes people think I have more confidence than I really do. It has taken me years to embrace it and is a constant struggle. So...thanks for those words of wisdom.

[Mrs Spoomonkey]

I have to Dito everyone here. Embrace who you are and the body you have. We've been swinging for several years and Spoo has been with women who are skinnier, rounder, smaller breasts...larger ones, blondes, red head and brunettes and each one had something about themselves that they worried about. He only noticed that they were hot!!

I worried at first and yes when I slack off on my workouts and gain a few I dread the mirror as I pass by but I have learned that most people aren't interested in whether you have a flawless, scare free body. Most people are looking for chemistry and attraction and when it's there the rest doesn't really matter.

One wife of a couple that we played with got nervous when we got to the room because when we started undressing she pointed out that as a child she had been burned and the skin on one of her hips showed the telltale signs of it. It didn't take long to let her know that it did not affect her attractiveness, fun personality and sexy curves of her body.

Don't turn down this couple that as you said contacted you first so they must like what they see. Go for it with confidence.

Mrs Spoomonkey

[2TexasTornados]

Thanks for all your encouragement and great "points to ponder". I knew I couldn't be the only one who thought about it. Funny, it's just one of those things that never crossed my mind before since I only dated men before getting married, and I never had sexual interaction with any more than one at a time. It's a whole new world! I know from my own experience that sexiness has a lot more to do with intangibles than a perfectly flat stomach or another fabulous body part. So I'm going to stop stressing. Thanks!

[Tia Vampire]

no i have never been intimidated by a woman's body, but i have been intimidated by a woman's race. my fiance has a fetish for asian women and i sometimes wonder if we ever was to come across a hot asian woman in a club or at a party, would he pay her more attention than me. not that he would stop loving me, but just make me feel invisible. as far as the bodies goes, not everything that shines is gold.

[Menage_a_Trois]

Originally Posted by Tia Vampire

no i have never been intimidated by a woman's body, but i have been intimidated by a woman's race. my fiance has a fetish for asian women and i sometimes wonder if we ever was to come across a hot asian woman in a club or at a party, would he pay her more attention than me. not that he would stop loving me, but just make me feel invisible. as far as the bodies goes, not everything that shines is gold.

Ok I have to reply to this on a couple of levels. Mr. Menage has a things for asain women as well as redheads (lost his cherry to one ), oh yeah a he loves women that are voluptuous and oh I almost forgot the whole fantasy of having sex with a little person. So if we could just find him a redheaded voluptuous asian little person it would be all over!!!!!!!!!

And as for paying her more attention than me.....well if I actually got paid more attention than any other woman at a club then I would have to check him for a fever since he see me all the time and we are at the club to experience "new" things.

But I do like your last comment because not everything that has a shine is gold.

The Other Mrs. Menage

[Tia Vampire]

thank you, exactly what i meant

[r_poseidon]

I know for a fact my girl never has been. She has the most confidence in her body of anyone I have met, and it's totally justified. Now a few people we met, the *other* lady has been a little intimidated, they as much told her that.