chp_thrill

newbie tuesday, think of it another way, you both like cheesecake, there is plenty there for everyone. Only you get to eat it, you eat you fill and say wasn't that great. Oh only I can eat "this" cheesecake. I know you are hungry, but didn't you really really like watching me eat my fill? Sure there are leftovers, but you can't have any. I'd tend to get a bit miffed too. Whatever works for both of you.

Until your situation changes, I would say to not only stay away from swinging, but keep it out of the "pillow talk" as well. Too much to risk, too many red flags, and too little time past since the cheating. Forget clubs, get the relationship fixed, not just working. If she cheats again, I'd have to say get a divorce. Good luck finding an understanding marriage counselor. You two have serious trust issues that may be resolved with time and effort.

Still in the haven't done it yet club. We talk about it, but mostly in the bedroom. We have talked about it since just after we met, and it just stays as a fantasy, for now. Mrs Trill said she would "do it for me", but I refuse to let her "take one for the team". Only when we both want it, and feel comfortable with it will we even try. As an aside, my ex and I talked about it, she even had a guy in mind. Now they are married, and we never did swing, or agree to her taking on a lover. Guess in the process of selcting a swing partner she fell in love with him, and never bothered with the "messy swinging thing". So with that experience in the past, am taking it really slow this time, and keeping communication open and flowing. May never swing, but if it happens, cool, if not, nice fantasy. M=cheap, F=Thrill