Jump to content

twoplayful2

Registered
  • Content Count

    228
  • Joined

Community Reputation

16 Good

About twoplayful2

  • Rank
    Swingers Board Addict

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    couple
  • Location
    Riverside, CA

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    twoplayful2
  • Favorite Club(s)
    CB's, Freedom Acres

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. I agree with JnCC. And my first advice thoughts on this thread were the same as BustyBlondes, deny, deny, deny! If it were me, even if they pulled out audio/video tape with full color closeups, I'd still deny it cuz it's quite simply none of their business. If he was looking for an apology because you kept him awake that's one thing, but he's looking to make a moral judgement where it's just not his business to make.
  2. We've been quite surprised to find many couples quite a bit younger than us who have WAY more experience than we do. We also quite frequently meet couples much older than us who are very inexperienced, if not complete newbies. So you go to the same types of places we've gone to you might have a pretty tough time guaging experience by age.
  3. We're 32 and 37, been in the lifestyle about 5 years now. Late 20's is probably the youngest we've been with, late 40's to early 50's being the oldest. Those on the younger end of the scale were probably a bit more disappointing overall. We've had opportunity with younger 20's but we usually just don't click quite as well with that age-range so we haven't gone any further. It's not to say that there aren't plenty of younger 20-somethings who we'd get along with (more maturity plus more stable relationship) and are sexually attracted to (and vice-versa), but we haven't been in that situation yet. I think it's more about experience and personality than age though.
  4. pacpl4funn, it sounds like your guy puts more priority over his kinky desires than he does over you and he needs a reality-slap in the face to snap out of it. It also sounds like you have, justifiably so, lost a lot of respect for him. IMHO the only way you two get things back to where they should be is he stops all this crap, including the wishful emails, completely and immediately and starts focusing on you instead. He *might* need some counseling as well, as he's sounding like he's a bit out-of-control with his sexual desires. I'd also continue to monitor what he's doing. I know sneakiness and distrust isn't the way of a healthy marriage, but you've got reason to doubt and he needs to prove his trustfulness to you again. And you need to know whether he's actually stopping it or not because if he's not then the situation will only get worse and more difficult to repair. I always have huge doubts people like this can ever come back to reality, but I hope that things do work out for you. I think it's great you've taken charge of what you want to do, stick with that!
  5. If our kids were still infants we'd have no problem with it. If they were just a couple years younger, depending on the exact circumstance, we might do it once we knew they were in bed and asleep, and then we'd make sure our door was locked. Our oldest just turned 12 and even suspecting that us and another couple were in our bedroom with the door locked would start her thinking about things I'm sure we don't want her thinking about so there is no way we'd do it at home now. Once our kids are adults, if they accidentally found out then we'd (uncomfortably) explain things to them about our views on sex, etc. Before that, we're just not going to take the risk that them knowing some of the things we do might steer them down the wrong path somehow.
  6. It almost seems like some rules are set up just for the purpose of testing each other out.
  7. If I may, it seems like kissing is such a natural and common thing to do while having sex that it takes a little more of a conscious decision not to do it. If you're in a common guy on top or girl on top position it actually feels a bit awkward to me to be avoiding kissing.
  8. We've been there, very recently in fact. Both of us are very into kissing, the other guy was as well, the other girl was not. Dunno if it's a general preference or she's just not into kissing me. For us it's not so important that we ask about it in advance, but it is important enough that we won't repeat with anyone with such a rule. And if it starts to happen too much then it just might become important enough for a pre-play rule. With this particular couple it didn't really matter, kissing was just one of several things we weren't really clicking on so we weren't going to be getting back together with them anyway. But if you're both into kissing as part of the action, why settle for a couple that isn't (both) into it? And speaking from the guys perspective, I don't really like my wife and him kissing not because I don't want her to get what I'm not getting but I don't want him to get what I'm not getting. Sure it sounds a little childish, sour grapes, whatever, but we like to play where we both feel good about things after. If the situation were reversed (though the few times it's happened it's always the girl with the kissing issue...no, my breath isn't bad! ) I would feel exactly the same way, as would she.
  9. I dunno. My gut feeling is that even when she told you she would say no that she didn't really mean it. If this is true, there are big problems and JnCC might be closer to the target than even the mighty Spoo. I hope not though, good luck to you.
  10. It sounds corny and all, but we both agree with those who said "love" is the thing you keep between yourselves. I kiss others with curiousity and lust, it doesn't come close to how I feel when I'm really into the moment with my wife. When I touch her or hold her hand I do it because I love her and just want to feel her. That's what we save because we could never match that with others even if we tried.
  11. new2theswingset, I agree with most of what you said but it still comes down to the simple fact that she can't be made to do what she doesn't want to do when it comes to swinging. If she's just really against it now, that's just the way it is. However, I think that if she's done it this long there's at least a good chance that she's open to the idea of swinging and has had at least *some* fun during the last several years. It just seems to me that it's very possible that this is a problem that can be fixed by good communications, some real effort on sex & romance just between husband and wife, and then maybe coming back as newbies someday with a little different approach to it.
  12. I'm curious why it is you've never really enjoyed it. I know it's not for everyone, but you've been at it for quite a while, I'm sure you've had your share of experiences, but never really enjoyed it? It seems like there's a good chance you two got into it for the wrong reasons in the first place. That being said, I agree that you need to stick to your guns but I also suggest you still try to be understanding of his feelings on this one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, marriage and the SO are more important, but it's a whole lot of excitement and fun (at least for him) to suddenly give up after four years. Stick to your guns but also try to be patient and understanding (as much as possible anyway) with him during this. Good luck though, this may be one door that's very tough to close.
  13. Yeah, we'd like to know what you did....uh, I mean what you would do
  14. Up to how much you want to do it vs how much you want to let things like this effect your life and how much enjoyment you're going to get out of it. There will always be *some* risk to everyone, even those with less to lose than you. We take certain small precautions like staying out of our town, keeping our pic out of the public profiles, stuff like that. But we feel the lifestyle is something that makes our lives more enjoyable and there's a lot more to enjoying life than making sure you're living 100% risk-free. Odds are you're never going to face someone like that. And if you do, there's some chance they've got something to lose as well so they're really not going to follow up with any sort of threat like that. If they make threats of blackmail make counter-threats of calling the police. If it goes further just deny their crap and wait it out, it will go away eventually. But really, this sort of thing has to be extremely rare. You're thinking that you've got so much more to lose than someone else, but to most couples they feel like they've got just as much to lose as you do by being outted.
  15. Marriage, IMHO, means you've made a commitment to work through tougher times rather than jump to the first sign of greener grass. I agree with what the recent posts have said, you don't know the true person that soon, you're only getting someone on their best behaviour, and you certainly don't throw your marriage commitment out the window that easily for a person like that. And again, you're assuming the feeling of "love" is legitimate and not misguided, clouded by feelings from a marriage that may just need a kick in the pants. I suggest that the commitment of marriage is important enough that she's clear on that before moving on.
×
×
  • Create New...