Are there other African American Swingers?

[illteachu]

Hello all. I have a question that is somewhat uncomfortable for me to ask because 1) it shows my lack of knowledge of the whole swingers lifestyle and 2) I don't want to offend anyone, but here it goes. My boyfriend and I are African American and we are new to the swinger lifestyle. We have not been to any clubs, and this is the first time that we registered with a web site. All the pictures that I have seen have been people of "other" ethnicities than ours. We have no problem with swinging outside of our race, but is their room for us in this world???



Please only reply if you can help...not ready to get blasted just yet.

[Honey_Tampa]

I have been on this site for a month now ... reading posts twice a day at least .. and I haven't noticed race be a topic or issue at all. I think that it HASN'T been mentioned is very lovely. It shows that it is a non-topic. Hopefully you'll find it a non-topic too.

And welcome to the site

[sexyshelby]

My boyfriend is Afrian American and I am white. We would (and many others on the board as well) would have no problem with it. There are other multi-racial couples on the board. I think you will find it to be a non-issue.

However, you will find people that do not want to play with you, but that doesn't mean that they're racists. Some people just don't find other ethnicities attractive. But there will be plenty of people who wont care if you're black or white or purple. Right Spoo?

In general, we're a pretty open bunch.

By the way, Welcome
Enjoy

~SS

[sexyshelby]

And by the way, don't feel uncomfortable about asking anything on here. We're a friendly group. I think that you'll find a lot of the people here give some great advice, so take a look around and let us know how it goes.

Glad to have you here.

~SS

[VegasLee]

I can not answer for the clubs in your area but the Two real clubs in Las Vegas will have not problem with you at all. Also at the convention you will find a great mix of people there. It does not matter, we are all there for the same reason.

Yes, there will be some that won't play with you but don't worry about it, there is 1000's more that will. Hell, there is many that won't play with me! I never worry about it, one more NO means I am closer to a YES!

Have a great time in the lifestyle.

[sexyshelby]

Originally Posted by VegasLee

I never worry about it, one more NO means I am closer to a YES!

That's a great way of looking at things. I like that line. I'm going to remember that in the future!
Thanks for the words of wisdom

~SS

[just1gurl]

Originally Posted by illteachu

Please only reply if you can help

Welcome

I've grown weary of hearing myself talk but I have some things to share with you I think you'll find of benefit... I hope!

My momma raised me to respect people. She taught by example. White, black or whatever. However, I think sexual attraction can be somewhat habituated due to our early experiences. Out of a graduating class of about 2,000, there was one black guy in my entire high school. There was virtually no diversity during my formative years, I'm not often sexually attracted (not to be confused with the fact that people of every color are so beautiful in so many ways! But it doesn't make my sexual engines crank up) to people of other races. (I would very much like to make an exception in Denzel Washington's case facelick )

In observing racial hatred once in an outside setting watching a white man approach a mixed couple and interject invectives, at about the age of 14 or 15, I decided that life and love was complicated enough without butt-inskies, and why would I want to add that complication to my life? So mixed race lovin seemed way to complicated.

Last year I was seeing someone who had this lifestyle on their mind and this was his take on race:

"I'm a guy, we don't care, women of all races are beautiful"

he also said this: "all it takes is a smile to get me going"

(gotta love an easy man)

With the advent of violent, denigrating and miscegynist rap music and its portrayal of women as whores, and the overwhelming acceptance of it and it being so thoroughly a part of "black culture" I'm - personally - unable to be even remotely interested in someone who listens to that - uh, stuff. But that's just me. There are women who like it.

ANyway, people will bring a lot of baggage with them wherever you meet them. So be prepared. And the female of your party is likely to need nothing more than a smile apparently! But, the male of your party may not find it that easy to get his groove on.

Forgetting the most recent thing that made me take some thought on it as well. Black men are the highest crossover between the homosexual and straight lifestyle and a harbinger of aids. This from the CDC, so flame me not.

so many issues!!! I dislike hatred, but my choices don't involve that as I explained. Younger people who've had opportunities to grow up in much more diverse environment are much more exepting of interrelations! So don't take it always as hatred. I'm habituated. I'm an old dog. That's all.

If you have the attractive card to play your chances will be very good too. We always make choices on appearances whether we want to admit it or not. I have ugly friends but I don't want to do ugly! I AM shallow! In shape or fat? These are things that people will discriminate against as well.

good luck! I hope you'll be fortunate to come across good people!

[intuition897]

Hi teachU, Welcome to the board!

Disclaimer: I've got a glass & 1/2 of chardonnay into me, so if I seem a little goofy in this post, please excuse me.

Like most folks have said already, you'll find that there is plenty of room in the lifestyle for you. The more the merrier, right? You will, of course, find couples/singles who do not prefer other races, but that doesn't necessarily imply that they are racist. It's just not their thing. For some, though, like myself, the visual contrast of skin tones and exoticness of those cultural differences is very erotic. No worries. Don't be discouraged by others who turn you down; there are just as many out there who won't. Good luck!

[HappyPeople]

We are a white/mixed race couple and like people of all colors, especially people with dark skin, so I'd definately say that the swinging community is lucky and happy to have you cumming aboard.

Also, you don't have to worry about getting blasted, the folks here are really friendly and helpful. It's okay to ask questions.

[sereneiders]

Just now I read the question, I realize how much of non-issue race is in this board (race isn't an issue in my country, so I am not used to think of things from the racial perspective).

But when reading this, I noticed something about the board itself that I didn't before: the colors chosen in the web page design, since they resemble the broad range of skin color most Americans have, shades of pink and brown. I'd have to ask Julie if this was a deliberated choice, since regarding to this thread, it seems to fit very well with the board spirit.

[dayhiker]

Hi just1gurl,
I thought your post was very well written. You expressed yourself and the way you feel without being negative towards others. So I don't think you are shallow as you mentioned at the end of your post. Not that shallow should be a putdown. God didn't create everyone to be deep, just as He didn't create everyone to want a lot of sex.
No one can be all things to all people. So we shouldn't put down people that can't be. There is a lot of talk about diversity but I often fine people aren't willing to accept diversity even if they talk it. There is some group that they can't accept. For example, as a recent Creationist, I find some people that believe in evolution have a real problem with what I beleive. There clearly is a trick too accepting people with whom we disagree.
just1girl, I think you did a great job saying your not sexually attracted to everyone, but that's not out of an inherant nagative feeling toward them.

LeeVegas' one more NO means I am closer to a YES! can really help a person have a good attitude I think.

thanks, reading posts like these help me have the right attitude.
dayhiker

[Sweet_Candy]

Originally Posted by sereneiders

But when reading this, I noticed something about the board itself that I didn't before: the colors chosen in the web page design, since they resemble the broad range of skin color most Americans have, shades of pink and brown. I'd have to ask Julie if this was a deliberated choice, since regarding to this thread, it seems to fit very well with the board spirit.

Pink and brown isn't that the colors of sex world wide?

[sereneiders]

Originally Posted by Sweet_Candy

Pink and brown isn't that the colors of sex world wide?

I didn't knew sex had a color (except when I catch mine with the zipper, then I see stars with the entire spectrum). At lease here we don't. I should ask around.

Poor me, thinking I made some important discovery here

[illteachu]

Thank you to all who replied, I feel much better. Your comments have been very helpful and comforting, and well put. My boyfriend and I are going to our first club next weekend. Can't wait to get back and tell of all the adventures that we had. "...one step closer to a yes." My ex used to say that all the time. You are absolutely correct.

Thanks again.

[WesternSwing]

Welcome to the board Illteachu. In most all cases race is not even a consideration, and with most of the people I know the variety is considered erotic and exciting. If anything, there is a lack of African-American women swingers in our area. You'd be very popular.

Mr. WS