Not wanting to participate with others of different races

[JustMe]

First let me say My question is not ment to offend anyone.
I was wondering about socials, parties, meet and greet..Where there are many people getting busy with each other, what if you want to join in but do not want to be with someone of another race? Should you not participate ( because it is a free for all right)?

I would really like to participate in socials, but don't want to offend anyone by not being involved with diffrent races! It is not that i am racist, i will chat, laugh, have friendships with others, but in bed...it's not a turn on to me. And if i am involved with an individual and someone from a diffrent race tries to join in it would possibly ruin the mood for me.
Any suggestions?

[JustAskJulie]

No swinger party is ever a Free-For-All. One of the main rules is that no always means no. If you aren't interested in someone there is no reason that you have to participate with that person. Even in an orgy situation a person should ask (or at least give the other person a chance to say no) before beginning to play with someone.

Same goes for you. If you are participating in an orgy or group sex scenario, ask permission before you start touching, kissing, screwing someone.

Just because it's group sex doesn't mean that everyone wants to have sex with everyone else (and that includes you on both ends).

Julie http://www.swingersboard.com

[CanadianCouple]

Justme --

Speaking personally, there is no sexual situation where I'd ever just assume I can touch whomever I want, without asking permission. I think the image of free-for-all sex is reinforced by group sex scenes in porno, but as if often the case, fantasy and reality can be quite different from each other.

Dan of CanadianCouple

Originally posted by justME:
...It is not that i am racist, i will chat, laugh, have friendships with others, but in bed...it's not a turn on to me. And if i am involved with an individual and someone from a diffrent race tries to join in it would possibly ruin the mood for me.
Any suggestions?

Same here...."Socially" I have no problem with ANY race. But "Sexually"...Now that's a different story.


Wife of CyberMWCouple

[LIZA]

what race are YOU?

[anandjeff2]

It's all about what turns you on... I havr very rarely met men of other races that I am attracted to sexually..but there have been a few that really caught my fancy. It is all about what you are attracted to. My brother dated a "type" of woman for many years..when he got maried it was to a beautiful woman of mixed race and the funny thing was he was so afraid we'd scare her off with our personalities we didnt meet her til hed been dating her for about 1/2 a year! She was convent raised so we could understand it..we have shocked her a few times over the years..all in good humour of course!LOL

When it comes to sex the strangest people turn you on..I have a frined who is modle material and her hubby ..many people think he is her father even though there only about 11 year between their ages.. but they are very much in love and their sex life rivals ours..so they sure arent missing out on anything!!


AN

Thank you all for your input.

LIZA...why does it matter what race i am?

[LIZA]

Race is obviously a big issue for you. To the extent you cannot look beyod a persons skin color and see them as an individual and be attracted (or not attracted) based on WHO they are, not what color they are..............So I was just curious. I would assume you are white, but just wondered

[myself]

Liza,
Have you ever talked to your dr. or pharmasist about any of the issues you seem to have? I'm no professional, but you don't seem very happy. You appear to be judgemental and negative. These can be signs of depression which can be taken care of very easily through either counciling or medication. You seen to take things way too personally. I know it happens sometimes when a area is near and dear to your heart, but every area couldn't possibly be could it?
As far as just me- wouldn't it be funny if they turned out to be black!! Lets face it, we all have our preferences, which is what makes us an individual. Just look at our lifestyle!! I'm sure we could raise some eyebrows if we told people we were swingers at our childs pto meeting. That alone makes us different. Chill out.

[LIZA]

No I am not depressed. I enjoy a good debate and find this (and other) message boards a forum for that. If I argued every issue with my husband or friends I would probably drive them nuts! Here it really doesn't matter. One of my joys in life is calling people on the hypocricy.........and I find it rampant here. If everyone just came here to write sweet little notes with faces.............it would be a pretty dull place!

[CanadianCouple]

Originally posted by LIZA:
To the extent you cannot look beyod a persons skin color and see them as an individual and be attracted (or not attracted) based on WHO they are, not what color they are..............

Yeah Liza. Like, right on. Just wish more people felt the same way about overweight women and balding men. Then we'd be able to share even MORE experiences with each other on here.

Dan of CanadianCouple

Again, it's all about choices & preferrences we ALL have of our own. It's the same as "If everyone just came here to write sweet little notes with faces.............it would be a pretty dull place!"....If everyone preferred the same "sexual type of partner(s) to swing with and post sweet little faces here", it would also be a pretty dull place too....


Wife of CyberMWCouple

[LIZA]

I see quite a few overweight women and balding men at the clubs we go to. I also see some people who look like the stepped out of Playboy/Playgirl. But the average/chubby/balding, etc are in equal numbers and I don't see any of these people being shunned. Also while whites are the majority, we have met lots of black, hispanic and asian couples and a LOT of couples like us who are interracial.
I guess we have been lucky so far to play in clubs where people are very friendly and OPEN MINDED.

[LIZA]

to the original poster:

I have never been to a swing club where people touched and joined in without pernission. That is a big no-no. HOWEVER........You will see people of other races nude, having sex, they may watch YOU have sex. They may ask to join and you will have to tell them "no". If you play in a group area, at most clubs, they may be right next to you. I have never heard of a "whites only" swing club (or ANY one race only) so if you can't handle what I describe above you are probably better off not trying it

[myself]

WOW you were friendly with your responses and opinions. I'm impressed.!!!