Ever tempted to get pregnant on purpose when swinging?

[HotCoupleGnS]

Dito Dito & Dito to everything EBF said!

[Mecka]

I'm a big conspiracy theory buff, so i had to chime in here.

A man thats never posted here before, claims that he can't impregnate his wife, so he would consider lettign his wife sleep with someone else, to possibly impregnate her.

The point in the thread that this arrives at, is the point when the most heated opposition to this particular topic is rearing its head.

Soon after, someone catches on to the fact that it says hes single in his profile. He comes up with an elaborate exscuse as to why he put single.

Woa, hold up, red flag. How many married couples on this site, when posed with this same question on any type of application or legal form, or web site sign up, would mark the latter?

Married_____Divorced____Widowed____ Single_______

Being married, no thought at all would be put into marking, married. It's second nature. I know when i fill out an application, or anything of the sort, i always mark single, with out even thinking about it. It doesn't take alot of thought. Its one of those answers thats just there.

So this leads me to believe one of two things. A) Hes a troll just looking to go against the grain, and disturb the flow, because he like the thrill of an argument. Even if he doesn't have a particular veiw on the topic at hand. He just likes the challenge. or B) He is actually the person whom originated the thread. Postign to back up the thoughts he/se already had on the topic, with out coming right out and saying it.

I lean a little more towards B, and if i had the time, i would check the I.P address of both of them. But alas, i need to sleep soon. The reason, A person posing as someone else, would think enough about the answers to the questions they were filling out, but are always destined to miss something blatently catchable. I've been a moderator for many boards on the internet, and caught many people posing as someone else to back up thier views. Sooner or later, they always screw up and let something slip. One person we caught, actually logged in under the wrong name, and gave them selves away. Acted as the other person, under the topic posters name.

I could be wrong, but either , this person, isn't actually a couple, and this whole thign never happened. Too soon to find out, too soon to actually do it, when it seemed liek he was in deep contemplation, and too quick to come to the aid of a veiw that makes only a minimal amount of sense, in being that it is only ever right if the coupel in question can't concieve, and everyone there is ok with it. or, this person is just the poster, and wanted a back up voice, that they could control. If I'm wrong, I'm sorry, but shit. I need sleep. night all.

[Elusive BiFem]

Originally Posted by Mecka

If I'm wrong, I'm sorry, but shit. I need sleep. night all.

I think you are correct, Mecka, and that is a conclusion most of us came to quite some time back. However, a troll or not, the recent post by catherine stirred my ire. Assuming he is a troll and none of this ever happened, I have to wonder why anyone would condone such actions...such blatant thievery (grand larceny IMO), disregard for another human, not to even mention the total disregard for any child brought into this world under these conditions. What can be said for any person that will knowingly steal another person's sperm...their DNA...to create a child that will likely live for many years and pass on that DNA to other humans?

Personally, I don't wish "the best" to anyone that would do such a thing. The unborn child, assuming there is one currently growing inside some woman...that's another story. Innocent to everything. But what a horrible way to start life - with two parents that literally stole the child.

What would catherine say if this child had been born and Neil had entered the newborn nursery and stolen him/her in the middle of the night? Most likely, she would have a different take on that scenario. But is this really any different? Again, IMO, if any of this is true, it is nothing more than theft and a subtle form of rape. The entire thought of someone doing this to another human - the man and the unborn child - is sickening. - EBF

[DBL D]

You da Man, EBF.

I have always envied those that see things so clearly.

Sometimes we feel if we compromise ourselves it's a good thing.

Well not in my opinion and not here.

This certainly is disgusting to think about.

It's one thing to give up a child for adoption and have that person live long before learning the truth about it's conception, but somehow I feel an even bigger lie would be involved to explain this other childs coming into being. One lie begets another. Isn't the truth so much simpler to deal with. Why do people think they have to devise such immoral ideas instead of just communicating their thoughts to others until they find their rightful solution?

Male D

[HotCoupleGnS]

The most awful thing to think about is how hurt the chiild will be one day when he learns what the truth is. I speak from experience on knowing someone who was lied to as a child. They were not lied to in the same exact way, but it is similar. Also, I think it is hard for a parent to love a child that is not truly their own. I know there are exceptions to the rule, but few I think. I am not a man, b ut can you imagine lloking at this child every day & knowing he is not yours? Knowing that some other mans blood is running through him? I think after a while there might be some resentment.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by Jocko Johnson

My wife got pregnant during while swinging. It wasn't a planned thing but we had three kids and I have been fixed. It was my friend who fortunatly has a somewhat similar body type as me. She has already had the baby and it is healthy. It's not as big a deal as everyone is making it. My friend isn't wierd at all, I treat the child the same all all the others (even though he's only 1) and nobody has said anything. It worked out well because my wife was actually kind of wanting a fourth but I was fixed and already had three so I didn't care. Made her happy and it was fun for me. Actually I watched the kids while her and my friend sneaked off the the SUV for some fun when the accident happened. Shouldn't say accident, it's been a blessing.

I think there's a big difference between an accident and going out and planning to get pregnant by a swing partner (as was the question in this topic). You dealt with your situation as you had to do. But you weren't sitting there purposely thinking, hey ya know I'm fixed and we want another kid so why don't we get my buddy to knock you up.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by Mecka

I'

So this leads me to believe one of two things. A) Hes a troll just looking to go against the grain, and disturb the flow, because he like the thrill of an argument. Even if he doesn't have a particular veiw on the topic at hand. He just likes the challenge. or B) He is actually the person whom originated the thread. Postign to back up the thoughts he/se already had on the topic, with out coming right out and saying it.

As EBF said, conclusion A is one that most people came to early on. Conclusion B, not even close and while you don't have the ability to check IP#'s here, I do and did.

[Elusive BiFem]

Thank you for the vote of confidence DBL D, but I have to admit that I don't always see things with complete clarity. When I get confused, it can take an army to un-confuse me, and in the process, I can confuse an entire batallion!

But this particular thread is really disturbing to me simply because the basis of the child at question (assuming there really is one) is built upon a lie and deceit. I feel so strongly that people do not have the right to lie to others. In doing so, it robs the receiver of the ability to make choices and decisions, and as a result, their life and actions/reactions then become a lie, if only to themselves. In this case, we have two "receivers." The unknowing provider of sperm plus the child. Both parties should be given the right to know what the basis of the entire situation is. But later, how do you tell the child...oh, well, your mom and I went out and screwed around with some stranger to have you. Right. That's gonna make this kid feel just great. And we can't even discuss the man's feelings about all this. Who knows? Maybe he would have been A-OK with the entire thing. But he still had the right to know he was being used as a sperm donor.

And hotcouple...as a person that was half adopted (by my father), I can honestly say in my case, my father loved me at least as much as he did my two sisters who were his natural kids. Sometimes, and especially in later years, I think he may have loved me even more. Certainly, he and I were much, much closer than he was to my two sisters. So yes, it is absolutely possible for an adoptive parent to love a child just as much as they would their very own.

It's exactly like Julie said in the preceding post...accidents do happen, and that is one situation. A person then has to make the best of the situation presented. But to go out seeking such a situation sheds an entirely different light on it. Neil's scenario was not an accident. It was deliberately and with intent - created.

But for me, it all goes back to this...do not rob me of my ability to make the best choices and decisions for my life and well-being based upon a lie. Once you've done that to me, you've stripped away the essence of who I really am. - EBF

[beaverlckr]

i think this is very irresponsible. Pregnancy should never be consider a game.

[Vespertine]

While I agree with the majority of the posters and feel that swinging with the intent to get pregnant is in VERY poor taste (not to mention dangerous) ---
I don't feel that they would be taking advantage of or stealing a man's DNA if he in fact chose to go "bareback" in the first place.

Now if the couple told the man that the woman was infertile or on BC---
That would be stealing.
But really, would you be THAT trusting to someone that you just met?
Believe everything they tell you to be true?
No, I don't think anyone with half a brain would.

If this scenerio happened at all (and I don't think it did, thank God), they stole nothing from this man.
He made the choice to not protect himself.
By not using protecton he's already chosen to sire a child or contract an STD.

The thing that makes me most sick is---
What kind of couple would try to get pregnant by a man with so little regard for himself?
This couple is choosing not only to get pregnant, but to possibly infect themselves & the unborn baby with an STD.
That's just WRONG.

[Eroica]

It happens in single life every day. I would not be surprised that a small percentage in the lifestyle population would find it exciting to try. However, we vote in the majority on this one.

[n02deep]

Getting pregnant without someone's knowledge/consent is a very touchy issue no matter how you look at it. Whether you're a single woman or a married partner it is never a good road to travel. I don't believe that any woman should get pregnant by a man without his express concious consent. It is unfair and really just plain F***ed Up that women do it for whatever reason and that society doesn't do anything about it.

Being a married couple and thinking you will be together forever and everything will be alright is fine BUT it is not a guarantee in any way. The odds are just not in your favor these days. I never dreamed in a all my life that the day would ever come that I would realize that a divorce would be an option to me, but it happened.

What will the reprocusions be for this child if things change in the relationship? The possiblities of the child suffering at some point in the future is regretably high. It doesn't have to be a divorce even. It could be something as careless as an arguement seemingly out of ear's reach where the dark secret is revealed to the child.

Legally, the woman could go after the "donor" man at any point for child support. Unfortunately in this country, the courts do not look at the circumstances whatsoever, just the fact that a man has been proven to be the father of a child and must now support it. I know, I'm dealing with such an issue right now. Only difference is that this particular woman is just a lazy b**** that wants a meal ticket and will never provide the home for this child that a loving couple could. The child looses.

I better get off of this subject before I fill this BB up with one post.

Good luck to you in the road you must travel. You have some serious decisions to make about whether you're honest to this child about how it was concieved or if you plan to try and take the secret to the grave with you.

[Chris&Amelia]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

Conclusion B, not even close and while you don't have the ability to check IP#'s here, I do and did.

Julie... I'm not trying to be a smartass, but IP's aren't necessarily a rock-solid ID. I know my ISP "rotates" us cable-modem users every two weeks or so. And when I was a dial-up user (shudder), I got a new IP every time I dialed up.

Just trying to help...

Posted by hotCouple:
I am not a man, b ut can you imagine lloking at this child every day & knowing he is not yours? Knowing that some other mans blood is running through him? I think after a while there might be some resentment.

Maybe in the context of swinging. I'm not sure.
But I am a step dad to a beautiful daughter and I don't think that way.

[HotCoupleGnS]

Originally Posted by Vespertine

While I agree with the majority of the posters and feel that swinging with the intent to get pregnant is in VERY poor taste (not to mention dangerous) ---
I don't feel that they would be taking advantage of or stealing a man's DNA if he in fact chose to go "bareback" in the first place.

Now if the couple told the man that the woman was infertile or on BC---
That would be stealing.
But really, would you be THAT trusting to someone that you just met?
Believe everything they tell you to be true?
No, I don't think anyone with half a brain would.

If this scenerio happened at all (and I don't think it did, thank God), they stole nothing from this man.
He made the choice to not protect himself.
By not using protecton he's already chosen to sire a child or contract an STD.

The thing that makes me most sick is---
What kind of couple would try to get pregnant by a man with so little regard for himself?
This couple is choosing not only to get pregnant, but to possibly infect themselves & the unborn baby with an STD.
That's just WRONG.

I have totally disagreed with this all along. But Vespertine, I do agree with you on this one. If he did choose to go bareback, just b/c, & it wasn't b/c the couple lied to him saying they are on BC or infertile, then he knew what chances he was taking. I am not saying that he deserved it. I am ssaying that he should have protected himself. If he had done that, then this couple couldn't have taken advantage of him.