Pregnant!!!!

[Lakotarose]

Hi all, I told you all that my fiance & our female friend had gone all the way just about a month ago well her fiance tried again to get what he couldn't that night but still couldn't keep it up for more than a minute which was fine by me i was still feeling a bit uncomfortable and my fiance & friend had done it again but she felt too uncomfortable being in the same place & all becuz this time she was sober so they didn't go at it as long as they did that first night now here's where I got the surprise my fortune readings told me about & to be prepared for but who could be prepared for this...My friend informed me that she was 2 weeks late not knowing exactly how far along she is right now but i made her take the pg test @ her house she bought 2 of them just to be sure & low & behold they both came back positive she saw her doctor he confirmed it & now the question is if it's my fiance's child or hers She says she doesn't know if my fiance's condom broke or not she couldn't really tell about anything from that night becuz she was loaded but she is quite positive that this baby is her fiance's. The only people really concerned about all this is her fiance & myself he even asked me if i knew if my fiance kept the condom on throughout the whole thing I told him i wouldn't know I wasn't there the whole time, I left shortly after he did. What doesn't help the matter is that my friend wasn't on protection herself for about a month while this was happening. Anyhow wanted to keep you all informed & up to date. I'll let you all know what the ultrasound prediction turns out to be so we'll all know exactly how far along she is, keep your fingers crossed, thanks all.

[windsor4fun2]

That definitely makes an uncomfortable situation even more complicated. How does your friends fiance feel about the possibility of the child not being his? Is the chance it isn't his going to be a major problem with him?

Good luck, I hope things work out.

Jesse

[JustAskJulie]

This is a hard one to deal with. I would look at it as tho it is her fiance's child. The only way you will find out otherwise is through a paternity test and considering the hurt that it could cause it's probably not worth it.

Have you talked to your fiance about this yet? Asked him about the condom issue?

I remember a long time ago we had a topic come up on here regarding what folks would do in a similar situation to this...

Here's a couple of topics you might want to refer to:

Pregnancy and Swinging

Pregnancy...

[thump29]

Chances are that it is not your fiance, because of the condom he used. I would definetely talk to him about it. Good luck, hope everythig turns out ok.

[fun_pairTX]

It is important to determine paternity as the childs medical future is dependent on its medical ancestry. Its too late to worry about feelings whats done is done, be real and deal with it.

[EternallySingle]

I was with an older couple. Well, older for me at the time. They were 38(her) and 44(him). It scared me to death when he came to my barracks and told me his wife was late and I might need to give a blood sample for the DNA test. I was lucky. Turned out that she was actually going through menopause early.

It is very important to find out who the father is as soon as possible. Like fun_pairTX said, it is important to know if there are any potential health problems that may arise in the future.

As far as the hurt feelings go, find a way to deal with it. I know that's a cold thing to say, but we all chose this lifestyle and all the dangers and complications it will bring. The four of you have to talk things out and decide how all of you are going to procede from here. It is no longer about the four of you, it is about a baby. THAT should be your main concern, not if someone's feelings are going to be hurt if its your fiance's child instead of her fiance.

[alabamafuntonig]

i cant imagine how they got pregnant with a condom on !

am i missing something!

[Lakotarose]

Well for one my fiance doesn't really remember much about that night either, all of us were drinking but I came to real fast once things started happening & got nervous. Our friends fiance asked her if Ken wore the condom the whole time that upset her becuz she doesn't know herself for sure if he did or not. I talked with my fiance after my friend found out she was pregnant he started acting guilty buying me flowers that night i told him the news and cleaning around the house which he never does! & as for paternity tests that would be easy her fiance has red hair she has blonde their daughter looks like her but with her dad's red hair & my fiance has black hair & on both their families side noone has had dark coloured hair or blue eyes they're either green or brown but yep they know that as soon as this baby is born after they find out how far along she is that they will do a paternity test. I'm not hurt exactly i've gotten over that a while ago after it all happened. It's happened before with them she was on pills her fiance wore condoms for the first year of being together she got pregnant with their daughter during that time so obviously both forms of birth control didn't work for them then & as for this time she was forgetful & wasn't on her pills for about a month so she screwed up in a big way & she knows it. I'm more concerned for her than myself she has 2 other children one from a previous boyfriend & the daughter her & her fiance have. Anyhow I just wanted to tell everyone I appreciate all the advice & this site it's been helping me out quite alot with all my questions. Thanks everyone.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally posted by alabamafuntonig
i cant imagine how they got pregnant with a condom on !

am i missing something!

Condoms do break... and sometimes they do slip (this has happened to me on at least two occasions - not a fun fishing trip).

Of course, you'd think if either of these had happened someone would have noticed. If she was so smashed she didn't, you'd think that he would have.

[lovers]

"Condoms do break... and sometimes they do slip"

That has happened to us. We've had two occasions (before we started swinging) where the condom broke and we had to make a mad dash to get the morning after pill. After the second mishap, Angie went on the pill. Since then, no worries (knock on wood).

It proves that nothing is 100% effective. So lets all be careful out there.

[St. Augustine]

(Cathy)

-------------------------------
cant imagine how they got pregnant with a condom on !

am i missing something!
-------------------------------

Lots of people have the misconceived notion that condoms prevent pregnancy. Historically they are known only to prevent the possible transference of STD's. If you want to prevent pregnancy it is wise to use another form of birth control along with the condom.. ie, vaginal supositories, IUD, the pill. People should never ever depend on condoms alone to prevent unplanned or unwanted pregnancy. Especially if you are in the "Swing Lifestyle".

[Vjklander]

and sometimes people just 'forget' to use them, or choose not to at the time. I think that accounts for a whole lot more instances than condoms actually breaking.
J

[Lakotarose]

Originally posted by Vjklander
and sometimes people just 'forget' to use them, or choose not to at the time. I think that accounts for a whole lot more instances than condoms actually breaking.
J

Yes very true that sometimes people just choose not to use one @ the time, the first time the men tried this they both were prepared to go @ it without the condoms that was exactly 1 week b4 the night everything finally happened & like i said she "forgot" to pick up her next prescription of birth control then decided to wait until her next period to take them which would've been around now when she would've started taking them her & her fiance have not had an active sex life for so long, trust me i've heard all about this for about as long as i've known them, & when the first weekend failed they've been going @ it non-stop then the weekend everything happened between us all it was that week she started feeling syptoms without really knowing it so I guess I should tell you all her & I have talked again for quite awhile after my last post we calculated it & the child should definetly be her fiance's her & my fiance, Ken, only slept together 2x her fiance, joe, & I haven't slept together once & lately he sure has been hinting around that he would like to but he has that problem of "stage fright" as he calls it & I'm just not too comfortable with the idea of doing it with him now that his fiance is pregnant although she has told me that she told him not to push it too fast to try again with me. That got me really confused since she told me b4 all this really happened that she wasn't into it & wouldn't do anything if I wasn't comfortable with it, none of them admit that they all talked about it & felt fine with the idea but no one talked to me about it & that's how I feel everything came about almost like I was left in the dark I just really don't know anymore but she goes in for her ultrasound in 3 weeks so she'll know just how far along she is & as for our men they've cooled off for now although they both joke that they're gonna be keeping me busy now that she's pregnant. I've led a rough life growing up wishing that something exciting would happen but I didn't mean this

[alabamafuntonig]

Lots of people have the misconceived notion that condoms prevent pregnancy. Historically they are known only to prevent the possible transference of STD's. If you want to prevent pregnancy it is wise to use another form of birth control along with the condom.. ie, vaginal supositories, IUD, the pill. People should never ever depend on condoms alone to prevent unplanned or unwanted pregnancy. Especially if you are in the "Swing Lifestyle".


um you got me on this one to my knowledge thats all there good for is stopping sperm! but hey whatever as far as my comment it was just a simple question. i relize as most adults condoms break,slip,tear ,burst and so forth my point was answeard by the thread starter and now im clear. as far as breaking on me it has happend thats why i pull out regardless of a condom or not its safer for me!

[Tarnished Halo]

My GOD! This must truly be a nightmare come to life. Another factor to consider in if we should be doing this. I am struggling with many issues, and didn't even condsider what if someone gave my husband a call and said guess what! Good luck to you, I don't even know what to say!