How did you get started in your poly relationship?

[easleyfuncpl]

I am sorry if this topic has been previously discussed (I am new here), but I am really curious about polyamory and how things get started.

My question is, has any couple ever fallen in love with another couple and all decided to be in a poly relationship together?

If so, how did it start? Did you start swinging with them and then things all just clicked? Or did you go into the relationship knowing you were interested in polyamory?

Thanks, and sorry if I have stated something dumb for lack of understanding about the poly lifestyle.

[TheDeal]

I have seen and experienced it happening. For us, it was a year investigating and exploring the local swinging community. Our best friends (a couple) found us out and then became interested in the LS. We all went out one night to a local event and ended up doing the same room / same bed thing. After that, we all started playing together. It turned into poly real fast as all of us already had strong feelings as best friends. Unfortunately, both of us (both couples) never had group sex or group love before and we all fell into our own little insecure emotional traps. Each one of us got scared of how powerful the attraction and emotions were and we all lost sight of the big picture and most of all, communication. They are still our best friends and I don't know if we will ever go down the poly road...or swinging road again. I can tell you however, it was the most incredible time of my (our) life.

I've seen other poly folks that have gone as far as to join houses and be one big family. Some are great, some become "War of the Roses" doubled!

Poly, like swinging can be a wonderful thing, just remember it's all dangerous. If you are a hard core sport-F'er swinger, it can be physically dangerous, and if you're a committed pure poly person, it can be emotionally dangerous. One thing's for sure, it's not dull!

G

[WesternSwing]

For us it wasn't a couple that was our first poly experience, it was a single male. We'd had some close friendships with other swinger couples, but nothing where romantic love had ever developed. Than came "the one".

He was a single guy we met that was just fabulous. In fact this guy set the bar too high for other single males. He was that good. But then again, he'd been married and in the lifestyle, so since he'd been on both side of it he knew the score.

So we hit it off from the first time we met and Mrs. WS and him started a very close friendship. I was traveling allot and he would hang around while I was gone and look after my family and even went and collected my teenage daughter from a party she wasn't supposed to be at one night. Him and I were friends as well and we all three hung-out together quite a bit. We had threesomes with him, Mrs. WS would stay with him at his house sometimes. We were a happy little triad.

The words "I love you" were never said, but it was obvious. But, he was looking for more than we could provide, which was eventually a wife and family of his own. The depth of the emotions were quite obvious when Mrs. WS and him broke-up. Mrs. WS was devastated. For months. I finally sat down with her and made her out loud admit she was in love with him, which she was very afraid to say for fear of hurting me. But admitting it to me, her best friend in the world as well as her lover and husband, was a huge step toward healing that wound.

Since then nothing has come really close to that. Allot of men have drifted through our life, but none of them really "get it" past the sex part. Several women have been possibilities, but they also were looking for a more traditional relationship, so having sex with us and hanging-out with us was one thing, but they broke it off when they started developing romantic emotions for us.

But, if the opportunity presents itself again, we are ready.

Mr. WS

[angfine69]

We got started by being in the ls for about 2 yrs. One night this couple came over to the house, we played and when they left my wife and I agreed that if they wanted to be exclusive then we would in a heartbeat. We are all defintely in love with each other. Looking forward to getting a house and being one big happy family!!!

[naughtywifeplay]

Our experience with Poly relationship was with a single male. Hubby and I had been looking for a playmate for awhile (we tend to be fairly selective). I had been talking to some guys through email and phone, when one really got my juices flowing. We had been trying to figure out some dates that we could all get together and meet, as my husband had not talked to him. I already knew he was the one! Prior to all of us meeting, he called me (which he usually did) and we invited him over. This was very out of character for me (meeting someone for the first time alone, and at my house), but it just seemed right.
He was everything I thought he’d be, and it didn’t take long before we were kissing. We ended up having sex for most of the afternoon. I didn’t tell hubby about the meeting or the ones that followed over a 2 week stretch before we all got together for the “general meeting”. When we all met for a drink, you can imagine the uneasiness between me and my new lover as we tired to not show too much emotion.
Following that meeting it was mainly all 3 of us that would get together to play. It all seemed to click among us. My hubby really gets off when I am really “into” my lover, and with this one- boy was I ever! LOL It’s always more erotic and enjoyable when you have sex with someone you really like. It was clear early on that we were very passionate with each other and we weren’t just fucking, we were making love.
Because hubby and I were so comfortable with this person, I would meet him by myself when my husband was traveling out of town. There was never a time that I thought of leaving my husband- It was just really great having two lovers.

[gatorvol64]

Gator and I weren't looking for a poly relationship at all...even if we knew such a thing existed. Tech and Kitten were looking to find a few couples that they could be close friends with and do other things with. They didn't expect to find it all in one couple I've heard Tech say.

We met each other swinging and at dinner that first night we talked for hours and hours. We tied up the table at the restaurant so long that I gave our waitress an additional tip...for the people that would normally have been seated at our table after we left (if we had left after a normal amount of time). We then talked for at least another hour outside the restaurant. And it was cold!!! We just all hit it off so well. (Not sure why we didn't play that first night.) Before we knew it we were seeing them on Gator's one weekend off a month time and again. Then on the days off he had during the week some.

If you read my other posts, you'll know that Gator and Kitten fell for each other right away. While Tech and I liked each other and were attracted to each other, we didn't fall in love right away. Neither of us are quick to let others in. And truthfully, I also tried to protect against it. It wasn't until we actually said we weren't going to see each other any more (youngest son had real problems with this) that Tech and I realized what we meant to each other. It only took a day and we met to talk and settle things with them. Been together ever since.

We would like to live together one day. We live 2 hours apart right now. Therefore, we don't get to see each other as much as we'd like. We try but, life just interferes at times.

We don't currently swing. May never do so. Some of us are ok with swinging and some of us think they have all they need and don't want to swing any more. But no matter which category we fall in, the truth of the matter is we have trouble finding time to spend together much less adding that to the mix. We have been trying to cement are relationships and make it through the rough patches you come across when four people enter a relationship. Especially if you had never considered being in a poly relationship to start with. It fell into our laps and we have been learning on the fly how things work.

Ok, this really turned into a small novel. Sorry about that.

Vol