Sex on the "first date"?

[yawanna]

When I was single I almost always had sex on the first date (what a slut! ). If I liked him and he liked me, bang zoom not a problem. The only people involved or who could be effected were right there, and it was just the 2 of us.

Meeting with couples in swinging, there are now 4 people to take into consideration, and 2 separate relationships to take care for.

It naturally takes a bit longer for 4 people to learn about each other before deciding to kick it up a notch

[ionsawmill]

And the central idea behind my next post, which will probably deal with differences between dating and swinging.

[Chris&Amelia]

Well, it depends on where we are and what our purpose is.

If we meet a couple in a "neutral" location, say a friend's house or a restaurant, then, no, it's not "sex on the first date", and we'll take them time at getting to know them first.

But, if we're at a on-premise club with the purpose of "getting it on", then we'll play with a couple if we hit it off with them during the night. But we're not looking to become long-term friends with them, either.

[duwannaball]

Both myself and DD, when we were single, have had sex on the first date or when meeting someone new thru friends or a party or whatever the situation happen to be.

When I met someone I liked and the chemistry was there, I would wait as long as it took until it felt right then make the move. In some cases it took several dates before it felt right, in others (like my wife of 14 years) it only took a few hours before the sparks were flying and needed attention.

We haven't experienced the lifestyle yet, but are interested and will probably be doing so soon, we both believe that when it happens we will progress with the same idea of, "if it feels right, then do it together", as long as you are responsible for your own actions. I think when we do swing it will depend on the people and the situation, just like when we were single.

Butch-

[akamgaxoxo]

I am gonna have to say it depends on the circumstances...however, most that we have played with, we chatted online or on the phone for a few weeks ahead of time. We discussed in detail what were our likes, dislikes, and fantasies and oh yeah bounderies. This was all very key for us, and I think it helped our friends out to know this stuff ahead of time, and well it made the wait very hot indeed. facelick We did not have the kind of friendship at the beginning that we do now, as we have built that up as we went along....

[Bu&Sandra]

We are on the first date people. Period. We are in the lifestyle to have sex with other people/couples. We are not in the lifestyle to "date" other couples and people. For us swinging is all about the sex. Perhaps we are not the norm but we aren't looking for a relationship we are looking for sex.We already have a great relationship with eachother.

[WesternSwing]

It's only happened once.

Mr. WS

[JustAskJulie]

We will have sex on the first date if the circumstances and stars align themselves. I think the real question here (and a very valid one) is if you have sex on the first date how do you make sure that you discuss any boundaries, etc. I just drag the other woman aside and let her know what our status is and make sure they are ok with our limits.... or depending on the situation if all four of us are in a position to easily discuss it together we will do that before we ever proceed to a playroom.

To answer the question in your second post... both of us have had sex on the first date as singles.... and I do look at swinging as kind of like dating for couples, so it does make sense that we would do what we were comfortable with before. For ourselves, we didn't have sex with each other on our first date... but I did give him a BJ.

[des1re06]

If we can get past the initial awkwardness of the first meeting, and everyone is in agreement. Singles are easier, and house parties.

We're evolving.

Mrs. D

[LFM2]

We've had sex on a first date. It was easier with a single because of limitation purposes. We went back to his house and were free to talk about our compatibilities.

Couples are a bit harder since you have two people to "bond" with while talking about compatibilities.

[good times]

Well, since we normally meet folks at the clubs, and all the clubs we go to are on-premise, I would have to say that we usually have sex on the first date. Then again, is that really a date?

[MrsVan]

MrVan and I usually do not play on the first date unless chemistry is right..It is funny that this thread appeared because this past weekend MrVan and I went out to a vanilla bar and while there, we saw this couple walk in the door and I thought they looked familiar..Then all the sudden MrVan is telling me what pictures they have on their profile..

This couple was checking us out as they walked around and then after a few minutes the husband signaled MrVan to come over and yes, they were in the LS. We hit it off great with them and if they were not meeting vanilla friends that night at the bar, we probably would have asked to see if they wanted to go back to our place..

We typically do not play on the first date but that night we both were feeling it..

MrsVan

[havefuninsun]

We have played on the first date, but feel like we've gotten to know the couple through email and chat first.

As a single, I never had sex on the first date, but when Mr. Fun was single, his goal was to ALWAYS have sex on the first date

(MrsVan -- what a fun, sexy story!)

[MRSfun]

I can do ya on the first date. If you impress me

[sweet_tna]

We will! Since it's usually a couple weeks between first contact and the actual date, we've usually had time to chat and get to know the couple well enought to feel comfortable. So if the chemistry is right, bring it on!

=)