invites to someone's house/sleeping over

Weezie · 08-11-2003, 10:00 PM

Since we don't have any kids it seems like we are always inviting couples over to our house. We hardly ever get invited to the other couples house. Does this happen to others very often?
We are always very hospitable and make our guest feel so comfortable that it's not uncommon for them to spend the entire night. Don't get me wrong, we love it. We love to entertain. But we've never really stayed over at another couples house. It would be a fun change.

Elusive BiFem · 08-11-2003, 10:23 PM

I would imagine, Weezie, that for most with kids at home, it is really difficult to invite people over for the night. Trying to locate a place for the kids to stay all night, then worrying that one might get sick and have to come home, etc.

For some, getting to spend the night at your home might be almost like a luxurious mini-vacation.

-EBF

windsor4fun2 · 08-11-2003, 10:32 PM

The kids can become a major issue when it comes to hosting a sleep over or even entertaining late. Infact it can be harder to coordinate what the kids are going to be doing than it is to coordinate schedules with the other couple.

Since you have no kids the other couples may subconsciously assumming it is easier to go to your place. Maybe you will have to take the bull by the horns and tell the others you would like to be the quests for a change of pace.

Jesse

RnLinohio · 08-12-2003, 12:09 AM

Well for us me mainly go to on premises clubs, and they are so far away (2hour drive) that we dont' ahve the opertunity to invite people to our house. But we also have 3 small kids at home, and finding a place for them over night is hard to.

Robin

thump29 · 08-12-2003, 12:38 AM

We dont have people stay over or play at home because we have two small kids and it would be hard to explain. The kids do meet the people we swing with because we have barbeques and stuff like that with them. Its easier to go somewhere else to play that way no questions get asked from the kids.

OhioCouple · 08-12-2003, 01:01 AM

We don't have children at home, but I can certainly understand the reluctance to invite people to their home, children or not. We recently invited a couple to our home for the first time and I truly stressed out over it, from the time of the invitation until they were here for a few hours. It all turned out fine even when my youngest and most spiciest showed up unexpectedly with her little monster in training, in tow. However, I don't know how I would feel about inviting someone that I didn't seem to really know, very well, into our home. I would have to say that we would NOT do it, and that sort of invitation will only be extended to people that we have grown to know very well.

I am a very private person and my home is my sanctuary, always has been and even when I was dating my husband ten years ago, he didn't get an invite to my home for the first six months, just to pick me up for dinner. (At the time I had kids at home.)

For us, it is a matter of knowing and trusting the people we invite here, and that takes more than a meet and greet or an exchange of a couple of e-mails.

nikkilynn74 · 08-12-2003, 01:46 AM

I would have to agree that with older kids it would have to be more descreet. We will have to address that when our kids our older. Right now the girls are 21 months and we don't play at our house until they are asleep and when we go to our friends house, they go and sleep in the spare room...Our portable cribs stay at their house

I know that will eventually have to change.

Nikki

Brit_Pair · 08-12-2003, 04:08 AM

Because we don't have kids (and because our regular playmates do), the majority of our meetings take place at our home. It's no big deal really, but obviously there's the additional pressure of getting the place spick and span in advance. Also, even though we're in our own home, there's always a slight edge to the evening. By contrast, on those occasions when we've been able to meet at our playmates' place, it's felt quite different, much more relaxed, probably because the onus is no longer on us.

naughty A · 08-12-2003, 08:18 AM

Another 'no kids' here. and we don't mind entertaining at home a bit.

I do feel the obligation to keep an eye on the alcohol intake as I would with any other guest planning to drive home... and I always offer our playmates the option of staying over in our spare room afterwards. Depending on the length of the drive they face -- some do and some don't. Sometimes this also depends on if they have to get home to the babysitter.

I am definitely more relaxed in my own home and would prefer it to other people's homes... I do feel a little uncomfortable when other people have children (sleeping) in the house... you might know that your kids WON'T wake up... I don't.

I generally feel that we know our playmates fairly well before inviting them... but this provides the best opportunity for getting to know them better. (free exchange of conversation without other diners or hovering waiters present.)

Quote:

obviously there's the additional pressure of getting the place spick and span in advance

my husband loves this part as I always do a super intense cleaning for 'company'

Pat_38NV · 08-14-2003, 12:02 AM

We have no problem with entertaining our swinging friends at home. But we prefer them to depart after we are done. It's just our way.

And when we go to visit someone at their homes, we almost never spend the night. For one reason, my husband is one of those that has trouble sleeping in anyone else's house other than our own. I can sleep anywhere.... beds, couches, airplanes, behind the wheel...well...maybe not.

Misty&Todd · 08-14-2003, 08:18 AM

we do not have children yet so we would not have a problem at all with out playmates staying over with us.. however it seems that we are the ones that do all the traveling when we meet a couple online, i wish they would travel too.

RMRx2 · 08-14-2003, 06:07 PM

we enjoy guests and friends coming over.

we have yet to meet a couple to play with but if we were comfortable enough to play with them, we would be cool with having them to our home,,,and staying the night if it was easier for them and they were comfortable with it

the kiddos are older so that would have to be on the weekends they are with thier "other" parents

we often refer to our place as the rmr B&B as it's in the country and quite peaceful and pleasant,,,,,it is some work to keep up so we like to share it when we can ,,it makes the work more worth while

the rmrx2's

Greg & Sheryl · 08-17-2003, 09:17 PM

We are a childless couple whose situation is nearly identical to that of Pat_38NV. We have no problem entertaining at our home, but we prefer that our guests not sleep over. We own a modest one-bedroom condo, so we don't have a lot of room for others to spend the night. Furthermore, we tend to regard our our home as a private sanctuary for our morning activities, so it's unlikely that we would have overnight guests even if we had the extra bedrooms.

Also, we never spend the night at the homes of others because the wife finds it impossible to sleep in anyone else's bedroom. She can sleep well in hotel rooms when we go out of town, but we aren't able to take overnight trips very often.

MagicEnigma · 08-19-2003, 03:18 PM

Being on the single side of things, I've done it a good deal, and only once with a couple who had kids who were also in the house. However that was long after the kids were tucked into bed and we were securly in their basement.

windsor4fun · 08-19-2003, 05:26 PM

We have entertained out of town guests in our home...but only after shipping off our teenagers to visit Grandma. and one of their rooms was offered to our friends.
Even then there are too many questions from the kids....I think it'll have to wait a few years until we're empty nesters.

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View Poll Results: how do you feel about entertaining at home?
Do it all the time	70	11.48%
Never (kids at home? or give other reason)	158	25.90%
Only when kids are not home for the evening	173	28.36%
Yes, and guest stay until the next AM	118	19.34%
Yes, but they have to leave after play	91	14.92%
Voters: 610. You may not vote on this poll

08-11-2003, 10:00 PM	#1 (permalink)
Weezie Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 162 Location: MS Gulf Coast Status: female half of a couple	invites to someone's house/sleeping over Since we don't have any kids it seems like we are always inviting couples over to our house. We hardly ever get invited to the other couples house. Does this happen to others very often? We are always very hospitable and make our guest feel so comfortable that it's not uncommon for them to spend the entire night. Don't get me wrong, we love it. We love to entertain. But we've never really stayed over at another couples house. It would be a fun change. __________________ "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful"

08-12-2003, 01:01 AM	#6 (permalink)
OhioCouple Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 6,616 Location: Ohio Status: Married Female	We don't have children at home, but I can certainly understand the reluctance to invite people to their home, children or not. We recently invited a couple to our home for the first time and I truly stressed out over it, from the time of the invitation until they were here for a few hours. It all turned out fine even when my youngest and most spiciest showed up unexpectedly with her little monster in training, in tow. However, I don't know how I would feel about inviting someone that I didn't seem to really know, very well, into our home. I would have to say that we would NOT do it, and that sort of invitation will only be extended to people that we have grown to know very well. I am a very private person and my home is my sanctuary, always has been and even when I was dating my husband ten years ago, he didn't get an invite to my home for the first six months, just to pick me up for dinner. (At the time I had kids at home.) For us, it is a matter of knowing and trusting the people we invite here, and that takes more than a meet and greet or an exchange of a couple of e-mails. __________________ Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

08-12-2003, 04:08 AM	#8 (permalink)
Brit_Pair Active Member Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 3,635 Location: UK Status: Couple	Because we don't have kids (and because our regular playmates do), the majority of our meetings take place at our home. It's no big deal really, but obviously there's the additional pressure of getting the place spick and span in advance. Also, even though we're in our own home, there's always a slight edge to the evening. By contrast, on those occasions when we've been able to meet at our playmates' place, it's felt quite different, much more relaxed, probably because the onus is no longer on us. __________________ *It's not going to be an orgy. It's a toga party . . .*

08-11-2003, 10:23 PM	#2 (permalink)
Elusive BiFem Active Member Join Date: Dec 2002 Posts: 3,400 Location: Texas Status: Single Female	I would imagine, Weezie, that for most with kids at home, it is really difficult to invite people over for the night. Trying to locate a place for the kids to stay all night, then worrying that one might get sick and have to come home, etc. For some, getting to spend the night at your home might be almost like a luxurious mini-vacation. -EBF

08-11-2003, 10:32 PM	#3 (permalink)
windsor4fun2 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 371 Location: Windsor, Ontario Status: M half of Couple	The kids can become a major issue when it comes to hosting a sleep over or even entertaining late. Infact it can be harder to coordinate what the kids are going to be doing than it is to coordinate schedules with the other couple. Since you have no kids the other couples may subconsciously assumming it is easier to go to your place. Maybe you will have to take the bull by the horns and tell the others you would like to be the quests for a change of pace. Jesse

08-12-2003, 12:09 AM	#4 (permalink)
RnLinohio Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 136 Location: Ohio Status: Couple	Well for us me mainly go to on premises clubs, and they are so far away (2hour drive) that we dont' ahve the opertunity to invite people to our house. But we also have 3 small kids at home, and finding a place for them over night is hard to. Robin

08-12-2003, 12:38 AM	#5 (permalink)
thump29 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 333 Location: okeechobee, fl Status: couple	We dont have people stay over or play at home because we have two small kids and it would be hard to explain. The kids do meet the people we swing with because we have barbeques and stuff like that with them. Its easier to go somewhere else to play that way no questions get asked from the kids.

08-12-2003, 01:46 AM	#7 (permalink)
nikkilynn74 Active Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 31 Location: Abilene, TX Status: Married Female	I would have to agree that with older kids it would have to be more descreet. We will have to address that when our kids our older. Right now the girls are 21 months and we don't play at our house until they are asleep and when we go to our friends house, they go and sleep in the spare room...Our portable cribs stay at their house I know that will eventually have to change. Nikki

08-14-2003, 12:02 AM	#10 (permalink)
Pat_38NV Registered Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 8 Location: Las Vegas, NV Status: M. Female	We have no problem with entertaining our swinging friends at home. But we prefer them to depart after we are done. It's just our way. And when we go to visit someone at their homes, we almost never spend the night. For one reason, my husband is one of those that has trouble sleeping in anyone else's house other than our own. I can sleep anywhere.... beds, couches, airplanes, behind the wheel...well...maybe not.

08-14-2003, 08:18 AM	#11 (permalink)
Misty&Todd Here to Stay Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 57 Location: Sioux City Iowa Status: Married Couple	we do not have children yet so we would not have a problem at all with out playmates staying over with us.. however it seems that we are the ones that do all the traveling when we meet a couple online, i wish they would travel too. __________________ Life is full of magick all we have to do is look arround.

08-14-2003, 06:07 PM	#12 (permalink)
RMRx2 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 277 Location: Texas Status: Couple	enjoy quests we enjoy guests and friends coming over. we have yet to meet a couple to play with but if we were comfortable enough to play with them, we would be cool with having them to our home,,,and staying the night if it was easier for them and they were comfortable with it the kiddos are older so that would have to be on the weekends they are with thier "other" parents we often refer to our place as the rmr B&B as it's in the country and quite peaceful and pleasant,,,,,it is some work to keep up so we like to share it when we can ,,it makes the work more worth while the rmrx2's __________________ I got a sweater for Christmas,,,,,,,,what I wanted was a moaner or a screamer!

08-17-2003, 09:17 PM	#13 (permalink)
Greg & Sheryl Blogging Swingers Join Date: Nov 2001 Posts: 722 Location: Denver, CO Status: Couple	We are a childless couple whose situation is nearly identical to that of Pat_38NV. We have no problem entertaining at our home, but we prefer that our guests not sleep over. We own a modest one-bedroom condo, so we don't have a lot of room for others to spend the night. Furthermore, we tend to regard our our home as a private sanctuary for our morning activities, so it's unlikely that we would have overnight guests even if we had the extra bedrooms. Also, we never spend the night at the homes of others because the wife finds it impossible to sleep in anyone else's bedroom. She can sleep well in hotel rooms when we go out of town, but we aren't able to take overnight trips very often. __________________ Greg & Sheryl Our Swinging Blog

08-19-2003, 03:18 PM	#14 (permalink)
MagicEnigma Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 149 Location: Great Lakes	Being on the single side of things, I've done it a good deal, and only once with a couple who had kids who were also in the house. However that was long after the kids were tucked into bed and we were securly in their basement.

08-19-2003, 05:26 PM	#15 (permalink)
windsor4fun Here to Stay Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 78 Location: Windsor Ontario Status: female half of couple	We have entertained out of town guests in our home...but only after shipping off our teenagers to visit Grandma. and one of their rooms was offered to our friends. Even then there are too many questions from the kids....I think it'll have to wait a few years until we're empty nesters. __________________ ummm, WHERE are we going...and what's in the handbasket??

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