Promiscuity and Swinging

[funforall]

T is alot more experienced than me. She and her ex were into the lifestyle. She had a couple of pretty good stories of her past that I really enjoyed. I on the other hand never had sex in a room with anyone else in it let alone joining. LOL Save for my first wife as she was pressuring me for marriage, wanted to know why I wouldn't marry her. Looking for a way out I said there was things that I wanted to do before I got married.
She said name them.
I said a threesome.
Next night she brought home a girlfriend of hers and we had a fantastic time. LOL
She said there would be alot more of that and the next thing I know I was saying I do. LOL
Glad to say that marriage ended badly for I was able to meet and marry my dream girl.
She told me about her past experiences and even brought me to my first swinger club where we proceeded to have sex in a room full of onlooking people. This is the first relationship that I have ever had where I could be myself and say what is on my mind. We talk about everything and feel we are on a completely different wave length than anyone else.
R

[marlinspike]

I am married to my second wife and we have been active in the lifestyle.

An incident that happened while I was married to wife #1 turned me toward the lifestyle. Late one night #1 sneaked out of the apartment enroute to a late night session with a boyfriend down the street. I just happened to see her in the glow of a streetlight and knew her immediately by her figure. I followed and caught her in a sex act with her boyfriend. Then I realized that she had been screwing other guys for years. We had 4 kids and divorce was undesireable.

I learned about the lifestyle and rationalized that I could use #1's need for extramarital sex as a ticket for my pleasure too. We went to swing clubs together. There were unexplained absences that suggested that swinging with me did not fully meet her needs. We finally seperated. I met a nice widow and soon the widow and I were actively swinging.

After all the kids were 18 or older, #1 and I were divorced.

Within 6 months, I was married to wife #2. She had never been married, but told me about her prior very active sex life.

We became practicing nudists and eventually began swinging together. But there is no cheating by either of us.

[sportync]

In nearly every relationship I've witnessed during my life, one partner has controlled the bedroom activities...and it was almost always the one with the least desire for sexual activity. Almost, but definately not always, it was the woman...after all, it was her body which was going to be penetrated, so it was usually up to her how, when, how often and by whom this would happen. Only in couples who have embraced the lifestyle have I seen the liberty where each partner was free to express their own sexual fantasies and desires with the one they love, and still remain in love and on each other's side, as a couple should be. This takes a tremendous amount of trust, respect, self respect, communication and devotion to the idea that you truely want your mate to enjoy themselves to the fullest extent possible, and you also have a burning desire to share this experience with them... to be part of it, then to re-affirm your love afterwards. This, to me, is the essence of "Swinging". If it doesn't include your mate, then why do you have one? Sportync

[Sunswept]

I didn't loose my virginity till I got to college, my first was a very advanced girl, very unconventional, and in my our first night she took a very naive me into every imaginable realm, she squirted, was into anal, knew prostate massage, how to control a guys orgasm.. she was wild. I had heard the other guys talk about her and she scared a lot of them. But since I knew nothing about sex, what happened became my idea of a "norm". We became an item, she was bi, and there was a group of other students that were comfortable with more unlimited forms of sexual expression we played with, so my college years were very sexually free, and having multiple partners was no big deal, here I learned the joy of seeing my partner blossom, and her pleasure at seeing me blossom.

Then after school I dated, but noticed the real world was far different from what I had gotten use to in school. I got a career, settled down. Fell in love, got married. It was a monoganomous relationship, sexually a different life for me. The marrage was very troubled, she was bi-polar..she used cheating as an anti-depressant.. I had to walk a straight line and be there to clean up the messes.. until I burned out... we both decided to end it after 15 yrs.

Had a few "transitional" relationships after that, then met a remarkable woman. Something about us just "clicked", we became an item. Turned out she was bi, and her college life had been so similar to mine but she kept exploring, where I had become serious and conventional. It was like being reborn, I had closed down, she opened me. We never married, but we were in total love with each other and were together for more than a decade till she passed. From beginning to end, it was intensely loving, intensely sexual, intensely honest. She introduced me to "swinging" per se... had never thought what I had done in college as swinging. What I had experienced back in my college days definately helped me ease into swinging, as did the total honesty,love and commitment we had with each other. But I think that even had I been clueless about sex with others, with her it would have still been an easy initiation. As everyone knows, your partner makes all the difference.

[twobears]

Well, for myself I was fighting to get out of the mold, I found that a good description, one other couple used it. I could remember going against the normal, wanted to be different in all my attutides as well as behavior. I grow up on a farm and felt very close to nature, and it was a part of that feeling that gave me the inside desire to know what way it should be, I knew as a child that something was dishonest with society. I had a high sex drive and masturbation was a big part of my life. I lose my virginity very early. I feel that in most cases, young females are not usually as active as I was, the males are I think, don't really know, that might be another question. My husband was a virgin until he went in the Navy at a young 19 years old. He was actively playing with girls by the age of 10 or 11 years old, mostly just touchy feely and oral sex. My husband says that he knew he liked girls at a very young age. We are in the lifestyle now because I want to explore my sexuality, I have let myself be me alittle and fine I like the ladies as much as my husband.lol

[Jamie&Kieth]

Both my husband & I were fairly active prior to getting together (we both met in college, I was a sophmore, he was a junior).

I actually was going out with his roomate, my roomate was going out with my current husband ... small world ... which eventally led us to "swinging" with each other

[SluttyWife]

I think it could go either way, really. I found myself pining for all the attentions I had (really slutty past) and found acceptance (and much safer fun) for this sort of behaviour "in the lifestyle." I've met my share of couples though...many who have been drawn to swinging from a completely opposite place and wanting to make up for lost time and opportunity. <EG>

Slutty Wife ;-*

[JDApopka]

I had a couple of experences, wife still claims I was her first . I know that one thing that led to our first mfm is the fact that I wanted her to experience other cocks thinking that i was not good enough. thankfully I found out that I was just fine.

[clit pro poet]

We're both of pretty high sex drive, so the "fit" was and remains good in that respect. Of our interest in others - especially couples... Fun and lust; lust and fun. And dollops of interesting people and circumstances, enjoyment of one another, conversations, prolonged acquaintanceships, even friendship.

[alicat69]

Quote by Alleycat:
I was very promiscuous before my marriage.

Amen sister. I was one of the people who wrote 'the more the merrier'. I grew up on on a horse farm and I knew how nature worked. I am not proud of it, but I really couldn't tell you the last names of 1/4 of the people I have been with. I was really lucky not to catch anything... My husband also had more than his fair share. We are just proceeding with caution on adding new people now, because truely we are satified with eachother and we have been with enough people to know we are the best for eachother, but... variety is the spice of life.

[fj0065]

I was a virgin before I met my husband, he on the other hand was trysexual lets just leave it at that.

Curious Angel

[ratimadan]

Wife was virgin when we got married. I (M) had several grilfriends and had a few sexual encounters and experiences. Since we got married we have been faithfful to each other and have not cheated.

The temptation to cheat diminished when we started to consider swinging. We now believe that the lifestyle provides the way for both husband and wife to enjoy more than one sexual partner, avoid boredom in the bedroom and enrich the sexual experience without any sense of guilt.

Since our marriage is secure we are able to discuss openly among the two of us what would it be like to swap mates with another couple that we met and liked. We can talk freely about swapping mates in bed to enjoy sexual intercourse with her/him.

So, all in all we do not see our swinging lifestyle having anything to do with the past sexual experiences. Perhaps we as human beings are innately nonmonogamous and require multiple partners to fullfill our true sexual desires, wants and needs.

RM

[admiral55]

When we met, I was the swinger and the Mrs was "SEX? What's that?" We've been together for 15 years and she hasn't changed. She won't swing with me, and she says I better not bring her anything back (like VD or AIDS). She has been promising to take a step out with me but keeps chickening out. Oh well.

[sereneiders]

I answered "We were both highly active with different partners before meeting.", altough I think for my wyfe the previous option could fit better.

Anyway, we began being "friends with extra rights", by then I was jumping from bed to bed, sicnce my wyfe was a friend by then, she actually knew some of my lovers (she used to comment on them), and it was later one that our friendship became a partnership. However, we always keep the original approcah about the "extra rights" which turned into an explicit permission to have extra affairs, but anyway we (I) didn't feelt confortable with the extra affairs idea, and we ended up being monogamous just because we both wanted to. So I gess mine deserve to be the chosen answer for both.

As for me, I was THIS close to a threesome MFF by then in two oportunities (damn, it didn't happend), and use to fool around with a GF and her best friend, you know, in parties, even in the streets, kissing them both alternatelly just to tease people around :-) that's the closest I got to swinging by then.

[S&E]

Our beginings,

S (he) was the poster child for the more the merrier between age 16 and marriage at 25, we are talking in the 100's of different partners, not many one night stands, maybe 20 or so, most were repeat performances, getting together every couple weeks for recreational sex, these were the good years of casual sex before AIDS. While today it would be foolish and dangerous today, S had the luck of the gods and got thru those years without catching anything, the experience and diversity gained was immeasureable. S had a number of partners who were older than him, they were in the 30-45 age range, so at least 10 years older than S, who in retrospect benefited him more than he will ever know, as they trained him right how to treat a woman at a young age which has paid its pleasureable dividens over that past 20+ years. E (her) had no other partners other than S before marriage. After 20 years of great monogomous marriage and we now play & explore together allowing E to see what she missed during her younger years. S has shared his experiences with E and encouraged E to take her sexuality to the fullest and explore without limits.

S & E