Is your spouse your best lover? ever

[undercovercpl]

We have never had the "am I best" conversation but I can tell you that hubby will always be the best to me. I don't know if it is because of our emotional connection or because we know each other so well we really know how to please one another but none of the people we have been with have been anywhere close to him.

It would hurt my feelings if he said I wasnt the best but I would want to know the truth and I would appreciate him being truthful

[tjomc]

I have to say Yes my wife is the best i've ever had, we are new to the lifestyle and only had a couple playmates, but i was not a good boy when i was single, The truth is the main reason my wife is the one and only true lover and will always be is. When we make love together our hearts beat as one, we smile together, we share the same breath, She gets me she needs no instruction a simple sound or moan can and will change the situation. And i know those sounds she makes that move me....We enjoy the lifestyle and our playmates, but we don't need them they are a bonus i need my wife i need my children, i need the love that has grown for thirteen years and gets stronger every day...

[willyoats]

Depending on what you mean by best lover, this question may be too complicated for a yes or no answer. Compared to my wife, two of my partners have nicer breasts, one has a nicer ass, etc. Of all the body parts, my wife has the best legs of any woman alive (equal to Gabriella Sabatini, the tennis player).

Some give better blow jobs, others like anal more, etc.

The feeling of my penis in a couple of other vaginas has been better than anything I have felt with my wife.

That said, my wife is much more than a good sex partner, which no other woman can be.

So if best lover means a few sex acts, no she isn't. I prefer to think that a lover is very much more than a good playmate. Then the vote would be yes.

[tattooed2some07]

My answer would be a definate yet, the hubbies would probably be no. He's been alot more sexually active and expirimental in his life than I have though, lol.

[shecansquirt99]

Mr and Mrs both answering the same way on this one. We both KNOW how good we have it. She really is by far the best I have ever had. She said I am her best too. I love validation. And I love her too!!

[June_C]

Originally Posted by bonesray

My wife and I have been married for 30 years. We entered the lifestyle early last year. Last night she asked me if she was the best lover I had ever had. We have always been honest with each other, so I answered no. She is upset with me.

No matter how much I tell her I love her, she is hurt.

I would love to have some feedback from you.

Is your spouse the best lover you have ever had?

So, were you answering that she was not the best lover you've ever had... or, rather, that she was not the best sex you've ever had? For me there is a difference.

My spouse is the best lover I've ever had... but within certain realms of sex, he's not the best sex I've ever had.

I have something to relate to you regarding this matter... but I'm not so sure how beneficial my thoughts may be for you... as I doubt your wife, when she asked you that question, was placing the fine line between best lover and best sex that I incorporate.

I once allowed a friend of ours go down on me, after he came in my face, and play with my pussy while my husband watched after way too many wine coolers.... the friend was terrible with his tongue... and he was way too rough with his fingers inside me... and I was thinking he was way too inexperienced with female anatomy..... when he out of nowhere decided to do something to me that really made me whimper... in a good way. He had really short, stubby fingertips... and his index, middle, and ring fingers were all the same length... weird... but with those three fingers... he made a slow clock-wise waxing motion across and around the immediate area surrounding my clit... before long I was biting my tongue, gritting my teeth, shredding the sheets, and arching my back and rolling my eyes back into my head like a contorted demoness... I came so ferociously... and he had no problems making me cum again and again and again. After three minutes of cumming about twelve times... I was spent from having so many orgasmic seizures... and I couldn't move for what seemed like forever.

Intoxicated with pleasure and writhing under the vaginal afterspasms, I looked into my husband's eyes and sighed, "Honey, you should take lessons..." WRONG THING TO SAY... and the excuse that I was drunk wasn't going to cut it in the end. I couldn't tell at the time, but my husband was very hurt.

Now it was under my husband's encouragement that I be with the friend in front of him... and although the session was only going to entail fellatio and a cumshot facial, one thing led to another, and the friend said he wanted to taste me... my husband gave us permission to proceed... and the next thing we knew was that I was having some of the most wonderful orgasms of my life.

Eventually, my husband got over it... and it got to the point where my husband wanted the friend to do that finger method on me again. We got together a few times... but I haven't been able to cum that hard with the friend again. Perhaps the friend wasn't able to replicate the motion or find that sweet rhythm between my thighs... or maybe being fingered while having his extra-marital semen drying on my face and lips was what drove me into such unexplored orgasmic heights... or perhaps subconsciously I don't want to have soulbending orgasms with the friend again for fear that I'll hurt my husband again... or perhaps I was more sober during subsequent sessions, and so I wasn't able to relax enough. I don't know.

But I suppose what I'm trying to say is we will always be territorial when it comes to the possibilties of other people achieveing the best of us sexually. For my husband and I, we were definitely treading into unfamiliar emotional and sexual frontiers.

Now it's wonderful... my husband has adapted to the possibility that others may open me up to better and different physical experiences that he may not be able to provide... but in the end, the overall experience between my husband and I as lovers never ceases to flourish and become more intimate. In hindsight, he loved seeing me have intense physical pleasure with this friend. It was an entirely different experience for him being detatched from me... enjoying me from a completely different perspective... that we can so very intimately enjoy and love one another through my sex with another person. And this, indeed, is the cliche of the non-monogamous... but the sex between my husband and I has never been better as a result.

My husband now wants me to be with larger cocks... and perhaps with other women... my husband even wants to lavish in the expression on my face and in the sound of my voice when an excessively large cock first enters my ass. But I'm not ready for those things yet.... perhaps someday.

But the bottom line is this... always contnue to be honest with your wife... and allow your wife to feel jealosy or whatever other feelings she may be feeling.... I'm not saying there won't be trouble along the way.... but honesty soothes over all and everything in our relationship... eventually.... and without honesty it just isn't enjoyable or worth it.

I dare say that if you, indeed, were being completely honest when faced with such a question... then she is the best lover you've ever had. Hopefully both of you may come to realize this as you go through this emotional struggle in your relationship.

[TwoLittleBirds]

Don't feel too bad... this question made me (hubby) think a minute. What is it that makes someone a great lover? I mean, my wife can't do handstands during sex, or deep throat without gagging. So does that mean the gals who could do those things were better lovers? I did think about that kind of thing.

But I like kisses from my wife almost as much as blow jobs from other women I've been with; I'm just so comfortable around her. She's open, and willing, and can be aggressive, too. And she thinks I'm handsome and studly! Not many women seemed to think that! She's also generous and giving in bed, not selfish, and allows me to take breaks which I can do because with her, I've got nothing to prove.

So while a friend of mine in Massachusets might be the most knowledgable lover I've been with, and a girl I "dated" (using the term loosely!) when I was 19 and 20 might have had the best technique, the best overall lover has to be my sweetie. I'd rather be with her than anyone. Except, of course, for bringing a friend to bed now and again! But overall: Wife best.

[Edison Carter]

Ed here-- It's highly probable that I'm not the best sex Susan has ever had. I say this having watched Susan have some pretty incredible sex . But to ask such a question is needing to be 'best' in any aspect of a complete relationship. It's silly. I'm the one she married, stays with and she always displays genuine concern for me in our life together.

When your wife asked the question, she wasn't really asking a question, she was looking for validation. Those are two very different things. When she didn't get validated, she became hurt. If it really was a question, she'd be interested in those things that could improve your sex life.

Again, since she really wasn't asking a question, being honest was irrelevant. And, under the guise of asking a question, you're 'screwed' for being honest.

[farmboy_sk]

I answered no, although we've been married 27 years, I had a number of relationships prior to meeting my wife, two of which still stand out in my mind.

One of these was a one night stand with a girl who became a good freind but not a long term lover, however it was a memorable night. We were such good freinds that some of our freinds suggested I was responsible for her first pregnancy since we had both been at the same convention shortly before she announced her pregnancy.

The other was a longer term relationship with an older woman who was able to bring a deep sense of intimacy and was willing to take her time with me to ensure we both had a tremendous experience each time we made love.

Were these two ladies better lovers than my wife? I don't know, but I also can't say that my wife is a better lover than they were. However as has been said before, I love my wife deeply, and hope to spend at least 27 more years with her.

[NWAtlSwing]

We have talked about it, and we both feel the best sex we get is with each other. We know each other's responses without thinking about it.

[BCinIN]

My wife and I are each other's best ever. The level of intimacy we have with each other is something neither of us had with anyone else, and something swinging--no matter how good--can't compete with. That said, there is a certain atmosphere that can be created when we are with a like-minded couple that is pretty mindblowing. Being with her is still the best part of the night, but having other people on the same wavelength with us is like gasoline on the fire!

That makes me think a bit, too. We're full swap, but are always very much involved with each other throughout any play (always same room, preferably same bed)--so in my mind it's not really even "I was just with someone else," but more like "I was just with my wife, and this couple was with us too."

[Ed & Bunny]

I have had some great and wonderfull lovers in my past, but none as ever been able to consistantly push my buttons the way Bunny does. Our sex is not always the hottest, but when it does get hot things nearby start to melt. Most important though, is that she is always willing to try new things.

[dantefontana]

Slystr and I have been together for 27 years, and I feel that we haven't even scratched the surface of the joy and pleasure we can bring to each other.

Yes, yes, yes! You are all that and so much more, sweetheart!

[Malachista]

I must admit that my former long term partners actually rank pretty low on a best lover list.
But then, well, we were young and did not know better
I also think that a new LTP would need to be quite fantastic, or I would not even bother with a relationship

[lustylearning]

Absolutely - no one knows me better, and knowledge is the key to success