How do you feel about swingers clubs?

[OhioCouple]

Since there has been a lot of talk recently in different topics about swingers clubs, this topic seems appropriate.

How do you feel about swingers clubs in general? Do you enjoy them, just on specific nights, not at all, what is a swingers club?

Please vote and then feel free to share your experiences as to what you like or dislike about them.

Lori

Since I travel, often requiring me to “present myself” as a single male, I tend to really enjoy clubs. I’ve had awesome experiences at both on, and off premises establishments (being somewhat of an exhibitionist) and have partied at on-premises clubs that cater to gay male clientele as well. Once I put my military time behind me (and put down roots in the USA) I truly look forward to developing a circle of like-minded playmates to party with in my home (and theirs of course)

Cheers

John

[DragonsLair]

My husband and I have only been to swingers clubs. We've attended Meneges in Nashville and LCDC in Cleveland. We've had a good time at both. LCDC in particular is very careful about the singles they let in. We've never had a problem there. They're starting to have nights where screened single men are being permitted to come to the club. Knowing the management, I doubt there will be problems.

The atmosphere is highly charged and very erotic. We've been entertained with the action on the dancefloor and in the seats each time we've been there. And it always leads to great sex between us either at the club or after we've gotten home.

LCDC has themed dances that are quite fun to participate in. And they also have just regular dance parties too.

From reading some of the other threads, I guess we've been lucky. We've never had a bad experience at the clubs.

DragonsLair

He is T. I am A.

How cool!!! My girlfiiend (and swing partner) lives in Nashville and we'll be going to Meneges when I'm there in March!!

Cheers

J

[DragonsLair]

Have fun, John. We were there only once but had a good time. We didn't really explore the club a whole lot, but it seemed very nice. They have a website that tells you what parties are upcoming. They also do themed nights.

Hope you and your girlfriend have fun and be sure to fill us in on it too.

DragonsLair

He is T. I am A.

Will do!!! (I'll be in Nashville for the whole month of March so we should be able to party there a few times)......

Wish I'd found the forum earlier. I had the "honor" of spending the night at Cleveland's Airport Hilton last summer. I'd have invited you guys out for a drink.....

Cheers

John

[RnKin Fla]

We've been to a few clubs.

First club (get this!) was the Candy Club in Amsterdam. It was so much fun, but kind of sleazy too. Fake fur on mattresses in the corner - that kind of sleaze (the GOOD kind ). It is a really small place. But fun. Loads and loads of fun.

Second club was Velvet Heaven in Atlanta. It was ok. There were many cliques. But the dungeon is FABULOUS. (If you are into that sort of thing.) I spent most of my night squirming around getting turned on by the happenings in the dungeon. There was one couple that seemed very interested in us, but the guy really turned me off, so...

Third club was 13th Floor in Dallas. It is a really neat atmosphere - not quite as cliquish as VH, and its in this huge, rambling house. The guys are really nice and friendly for the most part, and they do say that if any of the women are uncomfortable with what someone is doing, just say so. But, since we were new there, when the CREEPY staring guy in the corner started following us, I ran out of there just as fast as I could, rather than telling management. I wish I had told someone. I think we could have had a great time at 13th Floor.

We are dying to try the clubs in Las Vegas, and since we are moving to the Pacific Northwest pretty soon, I hear there are some great clubs in Seattle!

:evil:

[Gwendolyn]

My husband and I have had mixed experiences. The best places we have found are the ones that are controlled. Our favorite one was Lush in San Francisco. What crazy nights we have had there. However if you're looking for just something interesting to watch Power Exchange and Bondage a Go Go are always good for a side show.

[Tanman aka Mike and Marie]

We really enjoy swingers clubs also, having been to 5 different clubs we find that we really like Menages in Nashville also. We live in the Nashville area and have attended TSC in the past (don't bother going there they don't compare to Menages) but really enjoy Menages having been members for over 2 years now.

The nice thing about this club is there is a lot of different entertainment both upstairs and downstairs all set in a very nice atmosphere. Marie and I will be traveling to Atlanta for Valentines day weekend and will check out Trapeeze while we are there. We heard its a very nice club as well.

I'll be getting off my current ship and spending the month of March back in Nashville (my home before joing the Navy)

Menages is already on Mary's and my schedule.....

Cheers

John

(doing time on the USS Kitty Hawk)

[westman]

Sorry to be slightly off-topic, but this is a subject that has frustrated my wife and I for some time now.

We live in Los Angeles and really enjoyed the "After Midnight" parties when they were held in Culver City. When they closed, we decided there
was a need for a off-premises dance party series in West L.A. so we started our own. (Candlelight Nights) It was more a labor of love than a business venture, but we did of course have to make enough money to at least break even and pay the venue, D.J., security, etc. The goal was to
create a classy club that we ourselves would like to attend.

We put the word out through our friends, joined NASCA and placed an ad with them and advertised on the net via the various swingers boards.

The response was massive! Within a week we had over 500 couples on our email list.

First party: Only 12 couples show up.

Second party: Only 8 couples

Third party: Only 14 couples.

Forth party: Only 9 couples.

Great venue, fantastic music, free food but for whatever reason, we could not seem to make it "catch fire." We had to just stop hosting them as it wasn't worth it and with the miniscule turnouts we had no one had any fun.

Strange thing is, we still have an amazing amount of sign-ups on our mailing list every day, some even angry that we closed.

I've been involved in many successful businesses all my life, but I can't figure out how this could have bombed so badly. It's like the old saying "the operation was a success but the patient still died."

What does it take to make a club catch on? Are off-premises clubs no longer pulling the crowds they once did?

Opinions please....

[TeamSoBe]

Westman, were you competing with an established party like the Skin party or Fling or Bliss or something like that? That might be part of the problem, there are a lot of pretty well-established off-premises parties in your area.

Promoting parties and clubs is a very special kind of talent, especially in an area like yours. It's not just about getting a location and booking a DJ and sending out mailings, it has a lot to do with your overall PR skills and it has even more to do with who you know. It sounds like the element missing from your party was the initial "seed crowd". Any successful party needs to have a core group that shows up from the very beginning whether the party is cool or not. Peripheral newbies and B-List people will go wherever the A-List people tell them to go, so hooking a faithful core group is critical. Those inner-circle A-Listers expect to be comped, so you only end up making money on the B-List and the total strangers. Getting the strangers to come back month after month is hard, since the A-List crowd tends to be pretty cliquish and doesn't make them feel welcome. The key to keeping your A-List around is to remember to treat them like the talent. The DJ is there and playing because he's getting paid. the A-List is there because they get in free and they get comped bottles and tables and you make them feel important. You can expect to spend more on bottles for your A-List than on your DJ or dancers if you're doing it right.

If you don't want to build your party around an A-List crowd then you need a gimmick. Bliss has a different gimmick each time around, that keeps people coming. Fling's gimmick is that they put on an ultra-exclusive image and make you feel like it's a big deal just to be invited. We have a new party starting up in our area where the promoter is bringing in strippers to give free friction dances to the female guests. If you have a gimmick then you can maybe get away without the A-List core.

Another critical tecnique that any successful party promoter needs too, unfortunately, is that he has to be a really good liar. If you can't take your party where 12 couples showed up and put a positive spin on that so that everybody feels like they missed out on something and they need to be at the next one, then there is just no hope. You should have a web site with a post-party report thanking everybody for coming to the party and making it so crazy and showing your appreciation for the insane after-party at the nearby hotel afterward, and promising to make next month's party even bigger and better. Tell them in your after report that you're working on some big surprises for the next party, so be sure not to miss it. The big surprise can be anything, new dancers, a different DJ, improved lighting, whatever, nobody will question you as long as people are having fun. Learn to do the Jedi mind trick on people, don't ask them if they are having fun, learn to tell them "You're having fun", "Thank you for having fun at our party", "You will have more fun at the next party, tell your friends".

[Flori_DAMAN]

Take a look at yourselves.

Do you enjoy gatherings? Do you hate to go to weddings and funerals?

Are you family oriented?

I mean do you like to go to family outings, and have lots of fun?
Do you enjoy company gatherings?
Are you comfortable with being aroung large groups of people or do you get annoyed with the variances of the participants?
Do you attend concerts?
enjoyably?
Would you rather get together with a few people that have something in common?
Do you like loud music and dancing?
Does it bother you that you can't talk because the music is too loud?
Does it bother you when music you hate is played at 85+ decibels?
Do you mind that you really need to attend the same club for at least a few times before you really get to know someone and you will probably not be a regular until you go there about 10 times?


If you think any of these things are an issue then you may need to go to a lot of clubs and learn the ways. If you want to go to any club then you have to attend for a long time to be in the 'groove" unless you are a natural socialite.

Clubs have a lot to offer but there is the general reality that there are cliques. Of course cliques are in swinging clubs, church, bowling, PTA's, company gatherings etc.

Swingers are just people.

They will not take you in as a willing and acceptable participant unless you go throught the normal shit of being accepted by attending regularily like all the aforementioned groups.

Now I have seen people go to a club and be the hit..on the first visit....because they have a knack for it...decide who and what you are....but you don't know until you try. John.

[JustAskJulie]

As of yet we have only been to couples only clubs... that was the only option we had. If we could guarantee that the single males were limited and screened we would have no problem attending on a night when singles were allowed to go.

[HeidiS]

We've been to a local club a few times (La Chambre in Sheffield) and the problem is this. On Singles + Couples nights you end up being one of about 10 women in amongst 100 men! It was very intimidating and I kept my clothes on!

On the couples night you could still end up doing some things with 2 or more men only this time it was less intimidating. So, I agree with the above. Vetting of some sort is required, and a limit on the ratio too. 10 women to 100men!!! come off it!

Just my two penneth