Ladies, Would you have sex with a long haired man?

[DBL D]

Originally Posted by C n' D 4playin

NOW........for the geezer question of the week........

I am curious about opinions concerning the wisdom of coloring this aging ponytail.

It has been a flattering medium dark brown for the last 20 yrs or so........but lately the hair that isn't moving from the front to the back....(or relocating to my ears, nose, or worse yet...shower drain ), has been growing in grey.
My question is should i bother trying to color?....or accept the aging process with grace and wear the grey proudly?

D

BTW.......we have never had any issues raised about hair length ....that is one of my minor eccentricities.

I have a-little-bit-past-shoulder length hair. My hair is mostly brown but all the colors are represented. Black, brown, red, blonde and grey. I used that hair color for men on my goatee and didn't recognize myself. Then I saw an old photo and saw that my hair color really was that dark at one time! Time sure changes ones appearance and the perceptions that go with it! Oh well, I think I'll leave it the way it is for now.

I have been turned down because of my hair at least once that I know of. The ladies we play with now certainly don't have any problem with it. I'm not cuttin' it just to see though!

Male D

[fun4Ds]

I'm just curious about this. Would men with long hair be a stopper or turn you off as a first impression, with out wanting to know more about me?

The reason I ask is, I have very long hair. I keep it braided always, unless a play partner requests me to have it down. I can handle rejection at any time very well. I'm the first to admit if there is no connection its cool. Here is a rejection I just find strange

Its happened a few times where the male half approaches me with, "My wife doesn't like guys with long hair". Is that something that a woman couldn't say to me ?

I keep my hair clean, trimed and like I say, braided. It has just been something I don't think I want to change and here is why. My daughter while she was growing up and even now that she has moved across town, would braid my hair for me allot. While doing this ,it was many times she would talk to me about personal stuff in her life, serious stuff. Anything from her period, to who she would marry some day. Each braid to me, has meaning and memories.

I wear it actually under my shirt collar most of the time, and even surprised many. I've heard many times "WOW, I didn't realize you had such long hair"

Mrs.Fun, I think, could talk about stuff as well because lets face it, she has the upper hand if the right jerk of the hair is applied.

Its not like I'm trying to be a rock star or even have that attitude. But it just seems strange that its always the husbands who tell me their wives don't like long hair. I just think a woman would be more up front about this. Many times even in vanilla bars, women will walk behind me and tug on my pony tail. Yes I know its a message of ,hey do I have your attention. I mean you know, I'm going to look at who did that. Then they usually just smile and walk on. In a vanilla setting, I would tell my wife what happened.. In a swingers club or meet and greet, I would be telling my wife about the tug, and we would probably be heading to your table

Although its never happened, I could see a woman actually gracefully saying something like "You know, I prefer my men to have a military hair style" thats not a put down or anything and I would just be thinking, that cool. I am out numbered at most places these days anyhow. ITS COOL.

[TNT]

Well....I happen to LOVE, LOVE, LOVE long hair on men...bet that surprised some of you

It's never a turn off or stopper for me...in fact, I gravitate towards men with long hair. It does however seem to be a rarity in the swinging world. I'm not sure if Ted has ever had a husband tell him his wife didn't like long hair, he usually has women's hands in his hair most places we go. He has made the comment a time or two that he's sure it is a turn off for some women but, he doesn't worry about it.

Ted has caught a lot of flack from older family members about his hair...his reply has always been "Teresa likes it and until the day she tells me to cut it, it's not getting cut". I will admit there has been a time or two I've thought about him getting it cut...when we're playing around and our hair gets all tangled up and we wind up fighting his hair and mine, I'm sure it's a hilarious sight...the thought doesn't last long though...seeing him walk across the room with his hair all mused up from our playing nope, he ain't getting it cut.

I'm sure for women, it's just like it is for men. Some men like long hair on women, some like short...it'd be the same for women. Hair or lack thereof is not a deal breaker for me...if I like you, I like you and hair style doesn't matter.

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

I keep my hair clean, trimed and like I say, braided. It has just been something I don't think I want to change and here is why. My daughter while she was growing up and even now that she has moved across town, would braid my hair for me allot. While doing this ,it was many times she would talk to me about personal stuff in her life, serious stuff. Anything from her period, to who she would marry some day. Each braid to me, has meaning and memories.

That is one of the sweetest things I've read. It reminded me of watching our three girls playing with Ted's hair. He'd sit forever letting them braid, brush, put barrettes and ponytails in it...and like you, it was a special time for him. Even now that they are grown they still like playing with daddy's hair and braiding it for him and he still loves for them to do it.

Don't worry about your hair it's part of what makes you, you.



Teresa

[JustAskJulie]

One thought that crossed my mind reading this is that maybe some men are "challenged" by the idea of a guy with long hair. Some would not see it as "manly" and therefore would feel it a challenge to their manliness.... so whether their wives are turned on/off or whatever by it they may try to head it off at the pass (so to speak) by telling you that their wives are turned off by it.

I agree with you if there is something particular like that that I don't like (for me it's typically full beards) I will just say "I really don't find beards attractive" or whatever. Either way, I can't see me or anyone just walking up and saying "that's a turn off".

Are these guys male halves of couples you have approached? Or just coming up to you out of the blue?

[des1re06]

I'm particularly attracted to bald men and men with long hair. I hate military cut hair.

That's not to say that I'd not give a man a chance, no matter what type hair he has.

Lots of women dislike facial hair, so hubby shaved his mustache of 30 years. It was his decision based on my tender skin being rubbed raw.

Mrs. D

[tribbles]

I am sure a few avoid him without saying anything due to his hair and full, very long, beard -Think ZZTop

Others like it and it appears to attract them to him.

We decided early on to just be ourselves and not try to work hard to attract others and so far we are having lots of fun that way!

It does seem strange that the husbands are the ones telling you and not the wives. I'd just cross off that couple as playmates and move on though.

[fun4Ds]

Yes Julie, it has been mostly couples that we have approached on line or aproached us, via sls. Its a pic we share that Mrs.fun likes, with me getting out of the hot tub with a towell around my waist, and my hair is down. We share pics with us dressed nice, and a couple with us in a little less. You know, just so there is no surprises. It seems to be a deciding factor.

One particular time was at a club the last visit.

While we were in the kitchen/drink area, the husband was aproaching Mrs.fun talking. The thoughts would have been pursueing. Then Mrs.fun introduced me, and kind of off to the side He made the comment his wife didnt like long hair. She seemed to give me looks, but I felt somehow he was the one intimadeted or made the decision for her.

We just as you say ~moved on~ but still the looks I recieved from her, felt like an interest. Then again for all I know, I could have reminded her of a relative or a bad experiance.

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

I'm just curious about this. Would men with long hair be a stopper or turn you off as a first impression, with out wanting to know more about me?

Absolutely not a problem for me.

I can be attracted to men no matter what style of haircut, as long as it is clean, I love to run my hands through hair or across a bald head.

I cut Mr LM's hair and I think because of this I look at men and sometimes wish I could take my shears to them because I wonder if they may look better with a different haircut, but that's just my creative mind at play.

Having a guy come up to you and tell you his wife doesn't like men with long hair boggles me! I can only presume he's got more of an issue with it than his wife and, therefore, doesn't want his wife getting the hots for you so he's trying to keep you from turning his wife on by your charm.

I'd like to know the circumstances surrounding the times men have said this to you.

I'll put myself in your shoes. If a woman came up to me and said, "My husband doesn't like women who are tall" my first thought would be screw you but I wouldn't say that...although I'd like to. I sure wouldn't hang around her for long and I'd probably schmooze with her hubby just to irk her.

There is no need to tell someone why you aren't attracted to them. What's the point, really? I see these men's comments as rude and a lame way of trying to fend you off. Our long-standing belief is that you shouldn't explain why you aren't attracted to someone or don't feel compatible.

Keep your hair long, fun4Ds...and let it hang outside your collar.

LM

[Charmed6879]

Until I met my husband, I always dated guys with long hair, not as long as mine, since until recently mine was to my butt. DH was in the USN when he and I met, so of course he had military hair, and he actually tried to grow it out after he got out. It was not good, lol.
Now, if the hair style looks good on the particular guy, I don't care if it's long, short, shaved, ect... Well, I won't let dh shave his head anymore than he'd let me, but for just someone we play with, we don't care what their hairstyle is, it's all about the person and whether there is an attraction there.

[havefuninsun]

I don't like bad breath. And I like teeth. Other features are just those ... and not a deciding part of whether I find him attractive or not. But, with that said, we have read ads that say "no facial hair" -- Mr. Fun has a goatee, and I like it a lot as does he.

To each his own. And I love the story about your daughter. That is just awesome!

[sweet_tna]

I've never been attracted or un-attracted to a guy solely based on hair length. I agree with LM that it's probably the husbands that have an issue with your hair more than the wives. And it's their loss.

=)

[good times]

I don't think it matters what your hair style is, some will like it, others won't. I have a flat top hair cut, and I have had women tell me that I look to military or like a cop, so they couldn't play with me. It doesn't bother me much, I have my preferences too.

[MRnMSbhaven]

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

I'm just curious about this. Would men with long hair be a stopper or turn you off as a first impression, with out wanting to know more about me?

That depends. Do you mind if I wrap it around my hand and give it a little tug? I love long hair! We've never had the joy of playing with a gentlemen with such a quality.

Of course Mr B is completely shaved and I love that too. There's something to be said for being able to just give it a lick (with permission of course).

Facial hair on the other hand is a bit of a turn off for me but no matter what... personality always rules.

Ms B

[mrs good times]

When we met you two in Nashville I wanted to tug on that braid many times but I figured everyone probably does that so it wouldn't be anything special or maybe even annoy you. To me, your braid, says that you are very self confident. That's a good thing.

I like all lengths of hair and I also like facial hair. I think the different style says something about the personality.

[sexcupid]

Well...I would have to see a pic of your hair to make an accurate judgement.

But I agree with LM, wear it where it's visible...not inside the collar. That way there isn't too much of a suprise factor.

I used to totally have a thing for guys with long hair...but then again it was during the time of all the 'hair bands' and many of the guys I went to school with grew their hair long.

I don't like super-short miliary cuts (although Jeff will do it every now and then and it drives me batty...prolly why he does it. lol)...but as long as the style looks good on that person, I don't have a preference.

Just like certain styles of facial hair do not look good on all men (full beards, mustaches, goatees, or the more high maintenance looking 'skinny' facial hair...you know they shave half of the moustache or 'outline' the jaw, etc), it all depends on the individual to me.