Condom Use: principles vs the heat of the moment

[Karen12345]

Hallo,

welcome to a little poll and discussion about
"principles vs the heat of the moment".
Are swingers very disciplined concerning principles like for
example always using condoms? What did happen to your principles
when things actually happen: a party, a little drunk, sex everywhere...
The discussion should not be limited to condoms, but all broken
principles and arrangements are the topic, e.g. only soft swap,
no kissing, never in different rooms, always ..., never ..., ...

Karen

[dave110256]

I have learned to never say never

[julie_marc]

"never say never"... yes I agree. We are active swingers since about three years and there are many things that happened unexpected, unplaned or unintended. Concerning condoms, we started with the intention to never swing without using condoms because of health concerns. But there were a few occasions, where "in the heat of the moment" we broke this rule. But even if we would have been absolute disciplined about using condoms, there were situations where the condom that my partner was using broke or slipped of without us noticing in time. So my advice is that if you decide to swing with other people, you can in no way count on NEVER doing it without condom!

Julie

[Spoomonkey]

We are rather disciplined about condom use.

Funny, though, we have run into people who, after we tell this to, think that "in the heat of the moment" we really won't care. We had one couple ask us to break it (on our first play, no less) because the husband was having trouble finishing. And we had a single try to "slip it by" so to speak.

Oddly, when reminded, he could no longer keep himself hard.

I voted "with select couples..." because we have had one couple that we felt comfortable enough with. But it wasn't "heat of the moment" - we discussed it in depth before the play dates that we had with them.

Spoomonkey

[xxoticangel]

In principle we always insist on condoms during penetration. In reality there have been times that "in the heat of the moment" we have forgone their use. Why? I can't really say other than our passions were so high we didn't think about it until after everything was over. We've also had them break and slip off without realizing it. There has been two couples and one single that we were comfortable enough playing with to not use condoms but those were special situations with long term partners.

[JustAskJulie]

I will admit to being one of those that has been swayed by the heat of the moment, or other things. The thought is there but the words just aren't.

That got me in trouble (well not so much me but the other guy) one time early on. I was at a swing party with quite a few other couples, my hubby was off doing someone, and I was going at it with the host. Next thing I know we are doing the horizontal mamba.. next thing after that his wife comes in and a pretty ugly scene ensues.

I realize it wasn't my fault, but I still felt pretty bad about the whole situation, and we left shortly after. We actually didn't return to that party for several months because of that.

[julie_marc]

Similar thing happened to us. We were together with another married couple and swaped. I had a very good time with the other guy and things got so hot that we had sex without condom. But the fun ended abruptly when his wife noticed it - she was very upset that he was not using a condom. In contrast me and my hubby also agreed on using condoms with others, but we allow each other the freedom to make an exception from time to time.

[EvilMJ]

A definate always....especially considering I can still have children....!! No thank you!

Now with our best friends we are comfortable enough for my husband not to use a condom because the wife has been 'fixed' and there is no concern for diseases. However her hubby is not, so we always use a condoms.

[Belkin]

We always, always, always use condoms with others.

Unless they came straight from the lab, how can anyone be 100% sure they are completely std-free?

Condoms add a level of safety and, in my opinion, show a level of respect for your partner.

[northindycpl]

Does anyone use condoms for BlowJobs too?

[CplBeginners23]

When we startet visiting clubs, we only watched the other couples and let them watch us. One time we ended up kissing with another couple and having oral sex. It was great, but not planned at all. Heat of the moment I guess.

[nhcpl1968]

the heat of the moment can happen even if u always use comdoms it has happened to us but it was discovered before it was to late

[mde 4764]

Originally Posted by Belkin

We always, always, always use condoms with others.

Unless they came straight from the lab, how can anyone be 100% sure they are completely std-free?

Condoms add a level of safety and, in my opinion, show a level of respect for your partner.

Even if they just came from the lab is by no means 100% sure of anything. HIV can be present for several months before it will show up in a blood test.

[wiscpl]

Originally Posted by northindycpl

Does anyone use condoms for BlowJobs too?

This is an interesting point, northindycpl. STD's can be spread through the exchange of bodily fluids. The act of felatio can easily spread herpes or any other little germ that decides to take a trip to a new host. We have yet to meet a couple that insisted on condoms for penetration use them for male or female oral. I would be willing to bet this to be the norm through most of the community. And for those who do use them for oral mrs wiscpl would like to know how they get past the latex taste.

[ktimephoenix]

We both have an agreement, with new couples, condoms are worn. after we get to know and trust them, we are open to the idea of going without them, but haven't hit that situation yet.

but even in the heat of the moment, even if we're intoxicated, safety is at the forefront of our minds