Bi-women who don't go down

[xxoticangel]

I (female) consider myself bi because I love to taste, feel, touch another woman. I had my first bi expierence at 15 and have always found certian women attractive sexually but would never consider a romantic relationship with another woman. Our search for female partners is what eventually let to our involvement in the "lifestyle". That being said I have met some women that I would describe as socially bi. Being on the receiving end I could tell that they were not "into" the act and were just going through the motions. I also met with a self described "bi-curious" fem once. Being the expierenced one I tried really hard to make her comfortable and get her to relax. After an hour she finally gave up and left. Was I hurt? No, not everyone is bi. Disappointed? Yes. She was very hot and I would have loved to learn how to "push her buttons".

[2play04]

Originally Posted by De and Ci

Why does this make you sad? Thats just the way many women are.

Why? This makes me sad because it's a dishonest act.

It's the appearance of being 'Bi' to attract attention.

It's a ploy to draw eyes.

It's about surface perception and manipulation of said perception.

If a woman is only dancing/caressing/getting dirty with me because she wants more attention from all the men in the room, where in this situation is she spending time with me because she likes, well, ME?

It’s akin to ‘taking one for the team’, many people here have stated that they don’t WANT people to take one for the team for them. They can tell when someone really doesn’t want to be there…and you know how it makes them feel? Bad. Rejected. (And yes, it can make a person feel sad).

However, please don’t take this the wrong way. Being Socially ‘Bi’ is great! I have no problem with women who have fun and get a little close to other women for the fun of it, because they are in the party mood! I think it’s great to free inhibitions and have a good time…and if a woman just likes dancing with other women because it’s fun but isn’t really into women it’s all good!

You don’t HAVE to be attracted to me to have fun dancing with me – you just have to have fun dancing with me! However…if your ONLY reason is to attract attention from men…then don’t dance with me (or at least don’t TELL me that you’re only dancing with me to get male attention gosh darn it!). Pick someone else.

Mrs. 2play

[mixedcouple3426]

I really think you're on to something there.
This reminds of when I used to hang out in a chatroom that myself and a bunch friends would frequent.
When someone would come in and start gay bashing, the males in my circle of friends would always start operation stop homophobe.
We would all start acting like we were in a group homosexual relationship.
The homophobes would always take the bait and ask us if we were really gay and i would always respond with "No I'm not gay but my bf so and so is" or somebody else would say "I'm not gay because I haven't kissed my lover yet" or "kissing another man doesn't make us gay" or "It's only a gay act if you kiss and like it".The couple of regulars that were homsexual(one f,one m)always got a kick out of our routine and would say that it was an accurate depiction of how people who have same sex experiences rationalize how they aren't trully bi or gay.

My point is,I think some women might think that if a woman goes down on them but they don't return the favor, that doesn't make them bisexual.These people are probably just in denial about their true sexual orientation and they rationlize this by doing so.Some others are probably just selfish and have a stigma where it's all about them.This happens in hetrosexual realtionships too where the man will go down on his lover or vice versa but their lover won't return the favor.In the same chatroom I mentioned above,there were many f's who got it on with women but claimed that they were hetrosexual because "it's only a phase I'm going through at the this time" which suggests the trend and hipness factor mrs.good times mentioned.I really feel sorry for those women that will never get over their fear of being bi and continue their one sided sexual behavior because they are just fooling themselves and are missing out on a trully beautiful thing.The ones that are just selfish,fuck em,who needs them.I kid around with the few lesbian or bi f friends I have by saying that in my next life I want to be a lesbian so I can 69 24/7/365.Yes,I love going downtown that much

[DBL D]

Spike her drink with some "Juice".

Really, I have heard of this with guys but not so much with women. I say let her find out about it with someone else.

You wouldn't want her to have a bad reaction to you, if you know what I mean.

Male D

[fun_pairTX]

Some women are uncomfortable with bi-orientation, others claim to be bi to be cool. Some are unaware that hubby put them down as Bi on their profile, (we ran into that once). Mrs Fun's opinion is that if you do it again and again then you can be pretty sure of the Bi orientation. Women can also try the bi thing and revert to a totally hetero orientation without stigma.

Now men are totally different, we tend to label and the labels stick. As I was once told; "Play to a 2 handicap and they don't call you a golfer". "Throw a 300 game and they don't call you a bowler." "Suck one dick in the locker room and you are gay FOREVER".

[De and Ci]

Originally Posted by 2play04

.

If a woman is only dancing/caressing/getting dirty with me because she wants more attention from all the men in the room, Mrs. 2play

Point made! The key word here is "only". If a women can't stand to play with another women and is only doing it to please her husband, she is disrespecting herself. However, many women get excited by turning the men on in the the room and they actually end up enjoying the fem experience and being in the spirit of the party. But your right, if a women tells you "I don't this, I'm only because my man likes it" then you have every right to tell her to get lost.

[KarlnRenee]

I consider myself "bi-comfortable" (although I do hate labels!). We got into this lifestyle beacuse I wanted to experiment with my bi side and I'm still testing the waters. I've had 2 experiences (kissing, fondling, going down on one another) with women and both were pleasurable. I'm not sure that I will ever truly be bi, but I'm still checking that side of me out.

[2much]

Everybod's got their preferences - Mrs 2much falls into the category of "women who will play but won't go down" as she A. loves cock & 2. "just isn't a giver" - it could be awkward for the eager woman who wants to go down on her but gets left hanging, but we haven't run into it yet.

[ALilOEverything]

Originally Posted by 2much

Everybod's got their preferences - Mrs 2much falls into the category of "women who will play but won't go down" as she A. loves cock & 2. "just isn't a giver" - it could be awkward for the eager woman who wants to go down on her but gets left hanging, but we haven't run into it yet.

Just as long as someone does it, if her willing husband wanted to take over and finish the job I'd be fine with that, or even my own husband for that matter. I wouldn't want anyone to do anything they weren't comfortable with. I would even be content playing with a couple with a straight female who didn't want any contact at all. It's all good no matter what.

[Mrs Spoomonkey]

Lot's of different takes on this but I'll put my 2 cents in anyway.

I guess you could say I am socially bi or bi friendly. What I mean by that is, well, I love men!! There I said it!! However, since we got into the lifestyle I have had several different scenerios. One where I went down on the other woman and she didn't reciprocate Another the female was not bi at all and we just played with each others respective spouses. And, when the other female is bi to any degree then we're all four in a pile with the two women having the greater options (MF, MFM, FF, MFMF ) and the two men just loving it all.

Outside of the lifestyle playtime I am not interested in women, don't want a FF situation and not upset when we play with a couple that the female is totally straight because I always get my favorite . . . the male!!

Mrs Spoomonkey

[2play04]

De and Ci,
You are correct, we are pretty much in agreement on this! I myself love getting to know the variety of preferences out there...

This has been an educational thread for me!

Happy weekend!

Mrs. 2play

[GeorgiaCouple]

Well I thought I would take a moment to post here. Ive read through most of the replies and i guess i am a little bit different on the bi-side of things. I am bi 24/7. I dont turn it off or on..or have an "only time" to be bi. Its who or what I am.... I give, I recieve..... its the way I play the game... FF or MFM.... I play to win..and winning is giving and recieving.. Hubby and I have turned down single and couples who would only recieve and not give. If you are curious..that is fine...wanna learn the ropes.... that's great...but you gotta get your face wet if you ever really wanna learn if you enjoy it or not. What's the purpose in just having a woman go down on you... a man can do the exact same thing..... to be bi..you gotta taste, touch and feel a woman...

I was bi-curious to start with..but with my very first experience...i went for the whole thing.... if figured if i really wanted to know if i were bi..then i had to get in and do it all...so I did..and have been full totally out there bi ever since....

But like I said...I am bi 24/7.... I see a beautiful woman...i wonder... damn would i like to be between her legs....

But I love my hubby..and no one...and i mean no one can make me scream like he can..... if something ever happened to hubby.... the next guy would have to know the rules..I am bi and I will always be bi.... have to accept it or not.... this is me and this is the way i am...

[sugarcheeks44]

I guess I have been lucky....the women I have been with I WANTED to go down on....beautiful, clean sexy women that I just had to taste!
I cannot imagine being bi and NOT tasting her....
Hugs
Sugarcheeks

[JustAskJulie]

I don't have a problem playing with a woman who doesn't return the favor. I prefer to give rather than receive typically anyway (with both guys and girls), so it doesn't really bother me much if the girl doesn't return the favor.

[graygo98]

Interesting thread, and something that my wife and I have talked about. I think a lot of the confusion comes from the fact that some people think "bi" is some sort of yes/no thing. That you are, and are totally into it, or you are not and you are just sort of a poser. I think that there are way more possiblities than just yes/no. Kinsey described a 0 to 6 scale of sexuality.

Rating Description
0 Exclusively heterosexual
1 Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual
2 Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual
3 Equally heterosexual and homosexual
4 Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual
5 Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual
6 Exclusively homosexual

A lot of women that say they are "bi curious" aren't really curious at all. They know that they have a mild attraction to other women, but its not a big thing with them. They might fall into 1 or 2. Other women in the lifestyle who say they are bi seem to really be focussed only on sex with other women. I guess they might be a 4 or 5.

I think that you just have to either talk to the other person(s) about mutual expectations and ask questions or just go with the flow and try not to be judgemental if the other person isn't on the exact same page as you are.