Where are all the beautiful people?

I'm a little confused. Maybe it's just an age thing, I don't know, but I hear all these stories about the lady who met this guy with the ripples stomach and the bulging biceps and they had great intense sex yada yada yada Or the lady with the flat stomach, big breast you know, built. yada yada yada.

I never see those people, do you? I see woman who are size 14 and men who have a little belly hanging over their belts. I don't see these "buff" bods.

Maybe my hubby and I go to the wrong places, but I think we are just average and so are the people we meet. Hubby's 60 pounds heavier from when we married, and a whole lot more grey with less hair and Lets face, I was 92 pounds when I got married. 4 kids later, 125. I'm certainly not built like I used to.

I'm not complaining, hey, it goes with age and I earned every stretch mark on my hinney. I'm just wondering if we are unique, if it's a bunch of fantasy, or are we just older and going to the wrong spots. By the way, I'm approaching the 40 somethings and hubby's there.

We have found that swingers run the gammet(SP?) of all shapes and sizes.

Most are average.

But what we have found to be most important is personality.

People you can click with is what is important.
At least for us anyway.

[Spoomonkey]

Hi, Unregistered.

No - those glistening, buff bodies - perpetually oiled and perfectly swollen - are out there. Of course - they have the good sense to make porn and not ruin my club experience

Just as normal, average people rule the world; normal, average people rule swinging. We are not the perfect teenage bodies that populate the "girl's gone wild" videos - or the 0% body fat adonises that can be seen in the background, drunk and tossing fistfulls of beads... Most of us have a love handle or two that we worry about to, at and after the club... Most of us have plucked a grey hair or two... And I'd bet all of us have secretly sniffed ourselves for body odor and foul breath. Some of us wonder what that "hot chick" saw in us - or what it was that made that gorgeous guy hit on us in the first place...

The funny thing is - that "hot chick" and "gorgeous guy" are one in the same with the normal, average - grey hair pulling, love handle fretting, body odor investigating - people that you yourself seem to be... So - instead of wondering where all the beautiful people are, just smile, lift your shoulders and realized that they arrived the minute YOU walked in the door!

Spoomonkey

[bugaboos]

I have to admit... hubby and I are intimidated by the "beautiful people". We're average...and even though we are trying to shed those extra pounds, we're happy to be with other wonderful average people.... Okay, truth be told, I'm sure hubby would love to spend some time with an amazingly beautiful woman, but I'd be terrified to shed my clothes in front of either a stunning woman or man... lol.. *shakes head in shame*. That's just me though!

[fun_pairTX]

However, so are we anymore. What is best is that if the other exceedingly average couple we meet are genuine, real, and funny people, chances are we would enjoy slammin some of our fat against theirs. Nuff said....................

[windsor4fun2]

Originally posted by bugaboos
I have to admit... hubby and I are intimidated by the "beautiful people". We're average...and even though we are trying to shed those extra pounds

At the club we used to attend we had a decent circle we socialized with at the club and else where. There was one couple who we both thought the woman was VERY attractive, but figured she would never be interested in us.He was OK to I guess.

The club has since closed and we have had the opportunity to meet this couple socially on a few occasions. They are very nice, down to earth people. In fact she was often feeling left out at the club. She felt she wasn't one of the "in" crowd. Just like back in high school where the most popular girl was often the most lonely.

It is easier said than done but we shouldn't feel intimidate by "beautiful" people because they are often just as insecure as the rest of us.

Jesse

[a_couple_in_pa]

Go to the mall, grocery store, or a restaurant. Pick out 10 random people. Guess what... those are your "average" swingers. Not sure where you got the idea that swinging was only reserved for "beautiful" people. I've never heard these stories. The percentage of "beautiful" people swinging should be similar to the percentage of "beautiful" people at the mall.

If you're using porn movies to pick your 10 random people, your results may be slightly skewed.

I'm curious also, you state that you are "just average and so are the people we meet". If you were to meet a guy "with the rippled stomach and the bulging biceps" and a "lady with the flat stomach, big breast you know, built. yada yada yada", should they automatically be attracted to an "average" couple? If you're not interested in the women who are size 14 and men who have a little belly hanging over their belts, why would the "beautiful" people be interested in you?

[sexypairca]

Originally posted by Unregistered
I'm a little confused. Maybe it's just an age thing, I don't know, but I hear all these stories about the lady who met this guy with the ripples stomach and the bulging biceps and they had great intense sex yada yada yada Or the lady with the flat stomach, big breast you know, built. yada yada yada.

These stories wouldn't happen to be published in magazines or online ads now would they? Average everyday people don't sound so exciting, so that would account for the tales of swinging adonis' and beauty queens. It sells. Thats not to say that these adventures don't happen just not the norm from what I've seen.

Annette

[Mich149]

I'll admit it. They scare me. The beautiful people in the corner that keep to themselves and seem to have their own private party in the middle of the rest of the party scare me. I know I'm being silly and I know they have their own issues (probably even more) but I still get nervous and stupid around "the beautiful ones".

My body issues were one of the things that held me back when we first started. Now I've met so many wonderful people that are real world beautiful inside and out - that even though I may still have issues, I am much more comfortable with who I am and the extra skin that I'm in.

[2New2it]

This is a very timely post for us.

We recently corresponded with a very handsome, well-built young man who had answered our ad for a single male. After we got to know him by mail, he sent more R-rated photos of him with a gorgeous young woman with a perfect body.

Since my wife is quite a bit older than he is and suffers the normal effects of gravity and time, she was too intimidated by the woman's photos to meet him. She didn't wish to be compared with physical perfection.

He might have been a great guy, but too much beauty can be a turn-off as easily as a young Frankenstein.

[yawanna]

I know they have their own issues (probably even more) but I still get nervous and stupid around "the beautiful ones".

yes, they do..and chances are they aren't even there to meet anyone more than socially. Up here they are called 'posers'.
A few clubs cater to them, at least one other club allows them as part of an overall swinger environment.

Granted...no one is expected to meet and play everytime. The posers are the ones who rarely, if ever, get sexual with anyone. One club up here is total posers, yet states they are a swinger club. You just don't know til you go and see what goes on at a club.....or doesn't

I also respectfully understand certain 'cliques' being established amongst like minded..and even friendships developing. And even longterm play relationships. As has been broached before..how does one move on..or does one?

We are in this to meet more and new people, whilst retaining to some degree our initial swinger relationships. It's all about growing and experiencing, with no hard feelings wherever possible.

Supposedly 'beautiful people' are, IMHO for the most part (excluding a few ) there for the ambience and not much more. So not mixing with them, is no big loss

You wouldn't be missing any part of 'swinging'.

[yawanna]

The club averages 120 couples every Sat, young and old

an aside.. is it the norm that a club has 240 people attend in an evening? Slutty wife? Vegas Lee? Close Encounters?

[yawanna]

If this is the club I think you are referring to..they started with the discounted entrance fees and promoted themselves as a club for young beautiful people which has now come to be known as a dance club and not a swinger club.

And the 'hired hosts' regularly, in the club chat room, refer to other folks as 'fuglies'. Sorry. That is just what the original and subsequent posters are talking about... being labelled one way or another..which ..as most posters share..has little to do with who we play with. It's not just looks and it's not just showing up. It's the connections you make, or don't..and where you move on from there.

I'm looking forward to other club owners sharing, again, how many people (couples times two) that attend.

[yawanna]

Well.. we've attended every club in our area and the one you attend is known as a dance club aka poser club in swinger circles. However..that doesn't mean for one minute that it doesn't work for you. Five clubs offer chat rooms.. two are busy. I' m guessing (correct me if I'm wrong) you chat in one of the two.

Each goes where they choose.. with no recourse if all they've done is attend a club to check it out, or choose to frequent.

To each their own. Let people go where they choose as long as no harm, no foul. it's chat and message talk from host couples speaking of 'fuglies' that shows a side of bad swingers that is nasty. And isn't indicative of swinging. ALL I'm saying.

[yawanna]

I see that shehecpl are still responding but quite frankly..I'm tired and I'm off to bed with my lovely. husband,. Good night all


I'll check in tommorrow and respond if it's relevant