New With Questions: Self conscious about weight

I feel the same as Julie...

I'd rather swing with a straight-couple any day, over a bi-female couple who are only looking to swing with other bi-female couples!

I may be bi-"SOMEtimes", but that doesn't give anyone the right to THINK that they'll be getting any bi-"action" outta me!

If "it's" expected, then they're not our "type"! I REfuse to feel pressured in to having ANY bi-experiences at all, and we respect the same of others. I'd rather have things take it's course, in a friendly relaxing setting, and if the chemistry is right, if it happens, it happens, then cool! But if it doesn't, then that SHOULD be cool too by ALL involved!

This way, no one feels disappointed...


CyberWife

[Stratecpl]

Cyber Wife and Julie... thats great to know that there are bi and bi SOMEtimes.. women out there that feel the way you both do... I wish and so does my husband that there were some around here like that..we are not dead set against swinging with a couple where the woman is Bi..we just can't seem to find any that DON't expect me to be Bi Or expect me to "at least think about or try it" This is a small club and most of the people only do their swinging once a month at the party. So the bi women are there for their monthly bi fling.

It's all a matter of respecting other peoples wishes. We have had so many bad experiences over this bi thing. I guess I have just gotten to the point of being very tired of it being pushed at me..(I know you guys are not doing that..)but on the internet I have had it pushed at me wayyy too often at the parties it's there, not so much being pushed as we just don't fit in with them because I'm straight and the majority of the women there are bi and want a couple with a bi fem. And the very few straight people there just seem to have their own agenda and we don't fit into it either. We have met nice people there that we can be friends with..but as for ever being sexual friends it won't happen because of the bi thing. and it's not My choice..it's theirs..or the wife's actually. We met one very nice couple, we talked and had a good time visiting with them, chatted often online, phoned them a few times and them us, we liked them..they liked us we knew she was bi and she told us that my being straight was not a big deal to her. we thought there was some hope there of maybe something good developing.

The husband really wanted to get together with us..I liked him a lot and there is definant chemistry there with me and him. We danced this weekend, he and I. He wanted to get intimate..he said so and we shared a very passionant kiss that was wonderful..but then he pulled back and said he couldn't do anymore because it just would too frustrating since we could not go any further with anything becuase she doesn't want to be anymore than "Just friends" with us because I am straight and she would rather stick with her bi female friends at the parties. so she can have her bi action... we talk, visit, dance, flirt then....go our seperate ways....

It's really disappointing. To both of us, Ron really liked her and thought they may have a good time together just like I liked her hubby.

Connie

[CanadianCouple]

Originally posted by Stratecpl:
He wanted to get intimate..he said so and we shared a very passionant kiss that was wonderful..

Hi Connie, Dan here. Janette and I were reading your post, and she raised an excellent question.

Knowing your passion for intimate kisses, we assume his got your juices flowing. If he knew nothing more would happen because of his wife's wishes, why did he plant one on you in the first place?

Just wondering,
Dan and Janette

[Stratecpl]

Good question..haha.. it was a mutual kiss..I tongued him just as much. well actually it just happened... a chemistry thing I guess..I see your point though...

[This message has been edited by Stratecpl (edited 07-23-2001).]

Connie,

That's sad, that things "can't" work out for the 4 of you!

It's her choice that she's bi, and I'm glad that you & Ron respect this of her, but to "deprive" her hubby of having any sexual relations with you (which he admitted to you of wanting a sexual encounter with you), is very selfish of her! *Shaking my head* But hey, if he's okay with that, then oh well...

Hang in there! Believe me, patience DOES pay off!


CyberWife

[Stratecpl]

CyberMWCouple,

I really am beginning to doubt if a real couple exists anymore.... one that's not into jealousy, and one that is not a "NO-SHOW" (one of my pet peeves). One that doesn't try to force their beliefs on us, as if THEY know us better than WE do. One that doesn't view us as a last-ditch alternative when their REGULAR friends' plans have fallen through and it's either play with us or don't play.

How much patience are you talking about? In ten months, TWO couples??? One that lives 800 miles away and can't possibly come up often.... the other, a manipulator, trying to get us all to themselves so no one else can have us??? If they were different, we wouldn't mind, but they are not our type (we tried very hard with them, but to no avail). We don't like being OWNED by someone else.

Sorry to rant here, I needed to say what was on my feeble mind. And I'm sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes, I know many who come here are BI or BI-curious. If you are, I think you'd be welcomed into this local club with open arms.

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

[This message has been edited by Stratecpl (edited 08-01-2001).]

Feel better, Ron?

*Comforting hugz for Stratecpl, and anyone else who feels they need it too...) NO groping though! Please, keep this group hugz CLEAN! *lol*

I don't know what else to say...Except to wonder when your GRAND opening is for this PRIVATE club of yous?!

I think it would be COOL to have a "Meet & Greet" with everyone here on the Swingers Message Board though....*Nudging Julie & MR. Julie... ....LOL* Seriously though...

Hubby & I met online in what used to be a FRIENDLY chat room (until the buttheads out numbered us ), and we've made a lot of cool friends too! Some of whom we've met in person, and from other states as well, even those from Canada!

This was not a swingers chat room though, and this was way before we got into the lifestyle. We don't have a realiable vehicle anymore, but I think it would be nice to travel again and do the same here...

There's ALWAYS hope!


CyberWife

[anandjeff2]

Originally posted by Stratecpl:
we are not dead set against swinging with a couple where the woman is Bi..we just can't seem to find any that DON't expect me to be Bi Or expect me to "at least think about or try it"

Connie

Thats too bad so many are like that..I hid my bisexuality for over 20 + years ..noone guessed it in the least especially not my hubby. Our problem in this area is finding a couple who wants to do full swap..We have made 2 great sets of friends ,both of which the couple has a Bi Woman who wanted to explore her Bi side but that was all.Well not all the one woman and I have done some oral on the others man but that is all. We are still trying to find the elusive couple we canfull swap with eventually...myself I woudl never pressure a woman to "be Bi" as that is just plain disrespectful. We have run into the bed notchers in this area for full swapppers and we dont even want to go there..we like the friendships we have with our couples and prefer it that way...too bad you guys aren't closer this way....we always like to meet up with couples for a nice dinner and chat...


An

We received a short note from a couple with a bi-female today. I read their profile & ad, and they're looking for either a bi-female or a couple WITH a bi-female, and what they're REALLY into, is "FF action with her hubby watching, and if comfortable, then he may join in..." The ad didn't say anything about what other hubby is "welcomed" to do while playing with them.

I told my hubby, "NEXT!"

Like I said, I'm NOT a "girl-toy"! Besides, that's not our "thing"...Oh well...


CyberWife

[Stratecpl]

anandjeff2,

We'd certainly enjoy meeting up with you guys, too. You are very sensible and sound great. Where did you say you were from??

Yes, it's very hard to find the right ones. We originally looked for couples for friendship AND full swap, too. We discovered the bedpost notchers immediately, as well as the picture collectors and single guys posing as a married couple... or married men posing as single men. We always felt that cheating is wrong, no matter what.... but SHARING is GREAT!!! LOL

CyberMWCouple, you say "NEXT???" LOL I'm certainly glad that not everyone out there wants to exclude us men from the playing. I mean, what are we here for in the first place, to lift heavy objects and take out the trash? LOL

We have gotten e-mails very similar to that one, though. What really galls me is that IF they'd only READ OUR PROFILE they would have gained a real wealth of likes and dislikes!!! It's plainly evident whether or not they read that stuff, you know.... their first few words say it all!! LOL

Oh, well, I'll sign off and dream of that fabled PROPER swingers' club now.....

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

Originally posted by Stratecpl:
CyberMWCouple, you say "NEXT???" LOL I'm certainly glad that not everyone out there wants to exclude us men from the playing. I mean, what are we here for in the first place, to lift heavy objects and take out the trash? LOL

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

Hubby & I ONLY play TOgether and SAME room sex as well! No if's, butts (unless it includes Hubby's ), bribes, or whatever they think it'll take to get either of us to play separately!

I remember when the FIRST hubby of this couple that contacted us via email with pics of he & his wife...After emailing a few times, we felt comfortable enough to have him call us by phone, who later talked with my hubby a few times. He invited us over to their place for a "casual" get together to see how we would all get along and so forth. We ALMOST agreed, until he tried to talk us into SEParate room sex, if any. We both hit the breaks on THAT one! He said, that since we were first timers and VERY new to the lifestyle, that we should do separate room sex FIRST, then take it from there. I think NOT!

Well, we never heard from them again, since we told them what WE thought about his disrespectful "suggestion"... His loss. His wife seemed nice though, too bad her hubby was thinking with the wrong head though. *lol*

ANYway, I don't think this had anything to do with the "bi" subject, but it felt nice to "share"....*LOL*

OH yeah....ALL hubbies are VERY important to us wives, no matter WHAT we're doing, and including the hubbies in our play sessions is priority ONE! Having any bi-experieces is NOT! And I might add, for us, bi-experiences isn't necessary either in our sexual relationships!

I'm done babbling now! "NEXT!" *LOL*


CyberWife

[This message has been edited by CyberMWCouple (edited 07-24-2001).]

[Stratecpl]

CyberMWCouple,

I certainly don't call that babbling!! We enjoy little bits and pieces of the action, as they happened (or DIDN'T happen). We know a very nice couple that we have chatted with, dined with, and just hung out in general with. They're great folks, but they will ONLY do separate room sex. They don't try to persuade us to change our beliefs, but we know we'll never play with them unless we do because they absolutely won't. It's their loss, too....

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

Originally posted by Stratecpl:
CyberMWCouple,

I certainly don't call that babbling!! We enjoy little bits and pieces of the action, as they happened (or DIDN'T happen). We know a very nice couple that we have chatted with, dined with, and just hung out in general with. They're great folks, but they will ONLY do separate room sex. They don't try to persuade us to change our beliefs, but we know we'll never play with them unless we do because they absolutely won't. It's their loss, too....

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

When I noticed the time of my last post, no wonder I was feeling like I was "babbling"! *lol*

As for the "separate" room thing...This one couple that we swung with, we were their "first", and they were eager to get things going (mostly the other hubby). They were very friendly, she was kinda on the quiet side, but had a pretty smile and her personality was a plus to be around with. Her hubby was outgoing, very talkative, and they both could hold an intelligent conversation.

I believe I mentioned our "rendeveous" with this couple awhile back, but to make a long story short, while we engaged in full swap, her hubby turned "limp" and had trouble with doing the "deed". She just raped MY hubby for all he was worth (of course, you can't rape the "willing" *lol*), we ended up with a FMF 3some, which lasted over a couple of hours (poor hubby), while her hubby sat at the dinning table drinking his beer, and "coaching" us on how to please his wife.

ANYway...After ALL the 3some sex we had, and ALL her hubby's "coaching", we ended the afternoon with friendly goodbyes, yada yada yada....And never heard from them again! We tried getting in contact with them time after time again, but to no avail. We had each others home & cel #'s, but they never returned our calls. Again, "their loss".

BUT, a few months later, they sent us an email, answering OUR ad (again), and when we answered them (knowing who they were from their names & email addy *lol*), saying "HI so & so, but this is "us", how ya guys been, yada yada yada..." And never heard back from them (again)! What's up with THAT?!! *Shaking my head*

Through the grape vine, we've heard from other couple-friends who've met them one time or another through THEIR ads, that they only do "separate" room sex now. Why? We have NO idea, but can only assume the conclusions of it.

Oh well...Chuck one up for one of those WEIRD experiences! *lol*


CyberWife

[This message has been edited by CyberMWCouple (edited 07-25-2001).]

[anandjeff2]

Originally posted by Stratecpl:
anandjeff2

Where did you say you were from??


Oh, well, I'll sign off and dream of that fabled PROPER swingers' club now.....

Ron, Husband of Stratecpl

NY is where we are..lower part of the state...as for that proper swingers club..jeff and I were talking that its a shame we havent hit the motherlode..it could be kinda fun to run a club that is classy... course he would be more the guy below stairs..LOL if you get my drift...

An