Do you really weight 0?

[hfire269]

I always put my weight in.. even though it changes consistently.. I am about 160lbs give or take a few depending on the day.. lol I am considered a pettie BBW... But I dont consider myself a BBW by far. I am only 5ft so I am slighlty over wieght. According to the charts I should be like 120lbs. I wouldnt look right at 120lbs. Id fall over backwards because I have a 42DD chest... LMAO I am one of the few women that is actually very comfy with my wieght even when I was 180lbs at the beging of the year.
Putting a "0" in for wieght for anyone tells me that they arent true to them selves and probaly wont be confy with a swinging situtation so we dont normally mail them. If they mail us we ask for a picture if they dont send us one.

[txduo2000]

I put my weight in, though it is fudged a bit to the lighter side of my normal fluctuation.

When we see an ad, and there is "0" for the weight, we generally assume it means that they are on the heavier side of the spectrum, unless there are pictures ... in which case, we wonder why they didn't put their weight. :rollseyes

I understand weight along with age isn't really anyone's business, but even mainstream sites ask for these stats since it is such a blind way of meeting people.

[txduo2000]

Originally Posted by hfire269

Id fall over backwards because I have a 42DD chest... LMAO

Actually, if you fell over, you would probably fall over FORWARD ... the weight of your boobs would pull you forward. lol

[CatnLion]

While you may not be comfortable with those who post their weight as 0 we are not comfortable with those who describe themselves as HWP or looking for HWP only.

While I'll agree that swinging is an attraction activity what you don't have in looks you can make up for in personality. We are a BBW/BHM couple we play with all body types.

The point is we don't limit our selves out of the gate by not looking at or talking to HWP couples to see if there is anything of interest between us. While I hate to admit it I did fill out a profile once and put in it that if you are a HWP couple we will not hold that against you.

While it didn't get us many replys, it felt great to do it.

xxxooo

[DBL D]

Originally Posted by CatnLion

...While I hate to admit it I did fill out a profile once and put in it that if you are a HWP couple we will not hold that against you.

While it didn't get us many replys, it felt great to do it.

xxxooo

Shoulda said you WOULD still hold it against them...mighta helped.

Male D

[dragonblade]

My personal thought is much the same as bear and babe's, if someone asks me outright who's seen me how heavy I am, I don't mind telling them, but I gained about 100 pounds in a year due to a medication, and with being 5'11" I don't look my real size, but seriously, there's not a lot of people who if I put that I am 310 would contact us. Not that I'd want people who are snobby anyway, but the fact remains, my ideal weight according to charts who don't account for breadth of shoulder etc etc, say that my ideal weight is 180..I've been there, and I look anorexic at 180, but at 210 or so I look like I am 180 or less....people see me now, and though yes, I look a little overweight, I certainly don't look 300+ pounds, and anyone I've told in person were shocked...including doctors. So I guess the reason I don't put it is because not only does it not show my true self, ( I don't tend to put pics on a profile because of hubby being military and technically swinging and just about anything fun is against the rules ) but I don't put my weight because that's not accurate as far as how I look either...if someone asks I don't care and I'll tell them, I love myself, and though trying to lose weight, it's not an easy task. I tend to be a person not to look @ pics in a profile before reading them. That's just me, but I'll take personality any day, unless they have no teeth.

So I guess my rambling boils down to: To each their own, but if you want to know my weight, ask me, if that's all that's important to you, I wouldn't want you anyway, and if you're not attracted to my personality, you shouldn't be attracted to me even if I was model thin... I love me and my hubby loves me and that's all that matters right?

~~Blade~~

[EvilMJ]

Blade

I so understand what you are saying..!! I am tall as well and don't look anywhere near my weight. I remember one time back when I used to run regularly I had to seem my doctor about what I thought was shin splints (turned out to be a stress fracture but that is another story) he weighed me and kept looking to see if I had my hand on the desk or something because he felt I could not weigh as much as I did. So even in excellent health at the time I still tend to carry more weight that most (slow metabolism.. ) ah well.

I hate to list my weight because I feel that I will be judged harshly for it on paper/screen. I have read some people's profiles that specifically state that they want people that are in shape..ya da ya da..and I know if they read my profile with my actual weight on it they would say no thanks. I have met a few of these people in person and they have wanted to hook up.

So sure I am setting myself up for a lot of no thanks by putting zero down but I don't think my correct weight provides anywhere near an accurate picuture of who I am. I prefer to use recent photos and notes in my bio about being bigger (no I am not grossly overweight by any means, but I am definately curvy). I also agree that being overweight makes you more senstive and self-conscious about things (not when I am playing though... )

Brad ..I like your scale, lets go with that~

[Paphian]

Originally Posted by EvilMJ

Blade

I so understand what you are saying..!! I am tall as well and don't look anywhere near my weight.

Both you and Dragonblade do provide a separate means of "assessment" other than listing a weight, EvilMJ. You've got a pic, Dragonblade has an annotation that she's a 'BBW'.

I think at least part of what's being discussed in this thread (and what was certainly the thought I had in my reply, although I should have been more clear in that regard) is that some people's intent by using '0' is to deliberately mislead. That's what I meant when I said, "...does anyone really think that they're just so damn sexy and personable that when you finally meet, the other person is gonna simply overlook the fact that your personal ad was flagrantly misleading?" IMO, neither you nor Dragonblade are trying to mislead anyone.

I certainly agree with the idea that there's a lot more to swinging than just how someone looks. But as much as we all may not like to admit it, we all have got to get through that initial meeting. When we meet people in clubs or through other venues, there's no 'surprise'. We see people first, make a decision to try to get to know them--or not--based on a whole complex set of interactions that often follow the seeing, and then proceed from there.

On-line is turned around. We interact through a BBS like this one, or via chat or IM, and (especially in the case where there's no indication in someone's profile) build some kind of mental image of the people with which we're 'talking'. Unfortunately, that mental image is often very, very wrong and upon meeting someone, can be a real problem. It's the clash of perception vs. reality that gets in the way.

It's sorta like the old story (True? Beats me...) about how pilots, for years, had this mental image of the woman whose voice was used for some warning announcements in military aircraft. Most had this 'young fantasy girl' idea of what she looked like, but the reality was that the government had hired a woman in her late sixties that happened to have the right combination of the kind of voice they were looking for and a price they were willing to pay for the work. Pilots were dismayed when they found out.

[twoplayful2]

"BBW" doesn't always cut it either. Some women will put that and they're really not carrying more than a few extra pounds IMO. I'm with those who automatically "no thanks" anyone without either a number or a recent picture. We like bigger girls but we have a limit. We don't like too small either, that's probably a stricter limit. It's a pretty wide range though, but if you're not in it we're not going to be attracted. It's better to be upfront with people rather than surprise them in person. I also really think those who put zero are restricting the PMs they're going to get. There are too many profiles on Swing Lifestyle that DO have the info so we can just skip to them instead.

[GerdOEvert]

At the clubs, there do not seem to be many people overweight in our experience. I think the over weight do not get much attention, so quit coming.

But in advertisements, and photographs -- a million seem to be way out of shape. Also, if you meet couples for an introductory coffee, many more see out of shape.

I have a chuckle about the BBW group. They better be happy and laugh, because they do have limited appeal to a limited audience.

On a related topic, some clubs also advertise in a way that makes you wonder
"Do I want to go there?" or "Who are these folkd". Not all in this is "peaches and cream".

Otto

[kittycat11]

Well, as far as I'm concerned, any self respecting LADY always shaves alittle off her age and wieght!! (At least thats what my Momma says!!) lol.... really, I do shave a few pounds off my weight but I have a full body pic up and people can see what I really look like. But I have one of those bodies that seems to weigh more than it looks and I want people to get past the stats part and of course my own psyche loves the lower number!! It's a woman thing! Another thing my good old Momma always taught us girls was that you needed to look at inches and your clothing size and not put so much emphasis on the number!! Maybe they should include dress size instead of that foolish wieght range.